So last Saturday I went out to do some sarging...and I wanted to go ahead and do something a little more exciting. I wanted there to be more of a challenge for me when it comes to picking up a woman, cause I've got the routines, and everything about making myself look appealing to a woman down. So here is what I did to make the night a little more interesting...

I went to CVS Pharmacies and bought an eyepatch. I deciding on using this cause I figured I wanted there to be an instant turn off for me to work around. Then I went on my phones app store and realized they have an app with 1,000 cheesy pick-up lines on it, so I decided to use only cheesy pick up lines as openers with women at the club....this (I figured) would be a big road block to my game, and would make things interesting.

Here is how a couple sets went down...

Me: Hey, are you a model?
Girl: No, but I'd like to be...why? You think I can be a model?
Me: Oh yes, for sure. I think you'd make a perfect Campbells Soup model, cause you're MMM MMM Good.
Girl: HAHAHA! Oh my god, that is funny! Hey...what's with the eye patch? Did you injure your eye?
Me: No, I figured I could save money by only wearing one contact at a time. It works, you should try it out.
Girl: HAHA! Well I don't wear contacts, but I'll take your word for it. What's your name?
Me: Tom...
Girl: Well, Tom I'm Mandy, and these are my friends Maggie and Bruce.
Bruce: Hey there partner, no one told me Captain Jack Sparrow walked in the club tonight.
Me: HAHA! Right...well I was planning on showing your friend Mandy here my plank, Hey...have you seen my parrot?
Bruce: No, where is it?
Me: He's right over there... *pointed to a fat guy across the bar inhaling bar nuts*
Bruce: HAHA!! That's funny as hell. Well I'm not sure if I'd like you talking to Mandy...she's my girlfriend.
Mandy: NO YOU ARE NOT!
Bruce: *whispers something in Mandy's ear*
Mandy: Shut up!
Me: Well you want to know what I thought if Bruce was your boyfriend?
Mandy: What's that?
Me: To me, he'd just be someone to make us breakfast in bed in the morning.
Mandy: HAHAHA! Yeah Bruce...you get on that!
Bruce: That's not funny.


I spent most of the night talking with Mandy, I got her number and a kiss close off her, so it went pretty well. Here is another set I did with this really hot chick sitting alone in a corner pretty much.

Me: Hey...you know what I think of you?
Girl: (Looking real confused) What?
Me: If I was given the chance, I'd do to you like I do my jeans, and wear you out!
Girl: You're a freak...
Me: Well honestly it seems like every pair of jeans I get I blow the crotch right out of them. I'm not sure why.
Girl: What?! Is that your sick way of telling me you've got a big dick?!
Me: No, seriously I've got 12 inch pubes with 1 inch cock, so I'm just guessing the reason why all my jeans have the crotch blown out of them is....most likey cause I've caught my brother doing yoga in them. Sitting indian-style with them on and shit.
Girl: HAHA! Who's your brother?
Me: Brandon...but you might know him as Murph.
Girl: I DO KNOW YOUR BROTHER! He is really short...sort of looks like a leprechaun!
Me: Right, but I think he looks more like that goofy looking bastard off House.
Girl: What's your name?
Me: Tom
Girl: Tom, I thought you were a weirdo coming up to me like that...
Me: Well, honestly I thought you were a weirdo sitting in the corner acting like a wallflower in a crowded night club...but I'm nicer than that to tell that to you. What's your name?
Girl: Amanda

Long talk short I got a number close off her, and a free drink off her from doing the questions game to her.

In conclusion, I did good. Got 4 numbers and 1 kiss close for the night, and I was shocked as to seeing how nothing seemed to have changed much.

How do you guys go out and try to switch your game up?

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You all take 'er easy. And if she's easy, take her twice.

It was one of those days when not much went right. After work i decided that i needed some fun and wanted to enjoy the weekend.
I pulled out my best set of clothes and put them on my body.
i looked into the mirror and said how can you possibly resist me. I repeated this 20 times out loud. i called up the taxi firm and orderd a taxi with the destination of town. i knew that to change my fourtunes of the day i needed to get my mind in a deep pick up mode and challenge any doubts that crossed my positive thoughts.

TAXI- I climbed aboard the taxi and we set off on the journey. The taxi man was an asian so i said salam alekam. He smailed at me and gave a response that i did not understand. i continued with my conversation. " The sunshine is out and we are warming up nicely this evening".
The driver smiled and continued driving.

TOWN- I had reached town and paid the driver £13 which included £1 tip.
I still needed to get rid of all the negetivity from within my head but i knew When the storm does finally leave later, it will take the clouds with it and sunshine will return. i looked good in my jeans and my sergant over coat but tonight i was captain..........................

i walked to the first bar and there was a 3 set right by the door. i stopped and asked them " hello, can one of you guide me to the toilets please".
one of the girls said yes and grabed my hand and led me to the toilets.
When we got there i turned and grabbed her arm and said "i need to do a shit can you come and wipe my bum please"?
she pulled her arm away and looked suprised then walked away.
I didnt really need to use the toilet but it was mearly an opener.

the next opener was more succesful. This girl was an 8 and I asked her to move away from me because i didnt want people thinking i was with her. She gave me an upset look so i laughed and told her i was joking and she looked really great. i used and opener that i made up myself. " You know you can tell a lot about a woman by what phone she has". "really" she replied. I said to her give me your phone. she took it from her bag and passed it to me. I typed my number in and rang my phone. I now had her number. I said to her. You are very confident girl carrying a phone like this. I asked for name. It was MAndy. I said by and went to the other side of the bar. I rang her phone and she answerd. I said to her "Mandy you are still too close to me, please move away". she laughd and i went back and said i will call her tomorrow for a chat. i gave her a kiss on the cheek and left.

I went to some other clubs but Mandy was on my mind. I got a taxi home and went straight to the bathroom to masterbate.

The next afternoon I called her and we chatted for 20 mins and she asked me out for a drink. We are going to meet this Saturday. Hopefully i will fuck her. She is pretty hot and i would like to fuck her for a while. These last few weeks have filled our lives and minds with many stories but I tell you the story of mine because there’s another, much more amazing story happening all the time. The history books will have saved a few blank pages at the end of the storybook for us.

I will post the results of my date, today its not about having dreams and goals, passions and loves, or even a story to tell. What I take away from all this is how important it is to pay attention to your daydreams and not ignore them.
Peace be upon all that are strong.

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So there we have it!