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| Author | Message |
| Dangerous2012 | PostPosted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 3:28 am | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Fri May 20, 2011 9:49 am Posts: 22 | | Hey guys I'm pretty sure this is a SP because its an issue I seem to run into a lot. Now I don't have approach anxiety, because I'll go over to anyone I want and talk to them. But its that moment after I've opened, where I have nothing left to say. My mind's just blank. Now here's the twist:
I found a girl that could be LTR material. We've dated for three months, I thought I was over my conversation issues. Now, I'm finding that we both seem to run out of things to say, which just creates awkward moments of tension.
I know I should have built up my inner game before running into a relationship... blah blah but it just happened. Does anyone have any advice for me about how to continue conversations and think of stuff to say?
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| Beyond Pick Up | PostPosted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 6:43 am | |
| Offline | | MPUA Forum Addict |  | Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2011 5:43 pm Posts: 237 Website: http://beyondpickup.net/ | | hey if you don't have anything to say... it's okay to remain silent... you could DO other things... instead of doing verbals use nonverbals... cool right!
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| Dangerous2012 | PostPosted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 8:51 am | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Fri May 20, 2011 9:49 am Posts: 22 | | That's true... but eventually I'd run out of non-verbals to use. Can you give me some examples of these non-verbals? Or anymore suggestions? thanks
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| mellowmarshall | PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2011 1:14 am | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Mon Jun 29, 2009 5:03 am Posts: 11 | | Are there certain environments or people that make you feel social? What do you talk about with your friends? Family? For most people, the answer to this will be "anything and nothing". There never has to be a point to what you're talking about, and there often isn't - but no subject is off limits.
More than likely your tongue-tiedness comes from insecurity, not from a lack of things to discuss. Do you think you are interesting? Do you value your own opinions?
I have this problem myself, but I think the answer lies in inner game. You are putting pressure on yourself to perform and it is shutting you down. Remember this: most people have interesting things to say, but are not always good at communicating them. As a challenge to yourself, try picking a ridiculous subject and opening with it.
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| Chief | PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2011 2:54 am | |
| Offline | | Moderator |  | Joined: Thu Aug 23, 2007 9:19 am Posts: 5903 Website: http://seductiveintrovert.com | | Ross Jeffries says that you'll never run out of things to talk about if you're genuinely curious about her. That being said, you probably already know a lot about her if you're in a LTR with her, but you can always find out more!
Personally, though, I think this has more to do with living in the moment. Relax and don't worry so much about what you should say next or think too much about what you just said. Focus on the present, relax, breathe, and things will come to you. Don't worry if there's a pause - that's only natural. Just appreciate her. If you live in the moment like this, conversation will flow more naturally.
Also, this is a relationship issue rather than a Sticking Point, so I'm going to move this thread to the Relationships board.
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| Dangerous2012 | PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2011 11:46 pm | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Fri May 20, 2011 9:49 am Posts: 22 | | Thanks Chief and everyone else who replied. Yeah I admit that I'm a bit uptight and insecure while in a conversation; always trying to think up of something witty to reply back. I'll try out all of the advice that I've received; I'll work on my inner game, non verbals and living more in the moment. That should help me be more relaxed. Thanks guys!
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| cadmium | PostPosted: Sat Jun 25, 2011 12:20 pm | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Tue Feb 22, 2011 8:24 pm Posts: 22 | | Go shopping or something. There's always stuff to talk about in a mall.
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