I'm seeing this girl who seems emotionally unstable sometimes. But that's how girls are really, they need to be controlled and tamed. Saying the L word will only guarantee her success of breaking you down, which all girls love doing, even if they don't act like it. They prey on weak minded men. To me what a man says goes. Period. You need to be on point to be able to say such things to a girl you like. What I've done with this girl is I made her think nothing less and nothing more. She still wants my kids, I've only known her for a month and she's already given me the spare keys to her house. Not boasting or anything, you just have to be a little harsh in what you say if and when she makes you feel pressured or anything uncomfortable for you. No man should feel pressured or stressed by a woman. Period. Tell them your angry be ANGRY!!!!!! they love it. I tell this girl to make me food, she loves it. She does things for me cause I ask her nicely and coolly. When she's saying something you dont like, just act like you dont care. She will never want to be with anyone if she sees that you are a man and not a kid. Therefore she would want that for her self.

I agree don't say it, it will only eventually dull down the relationship. The movies make it seem like a guy saying the L word in some romantic gesture is the best thing ever but that's only if she is sure she wants to be with you forever. and if you say it and she's not feeling the same you're done. You will look weak. So leave her to say it first. I do have a question however, if a girl says it first should you say it back or should you not? I'm wondering if not saying it back would make her wanna prove herself more or give up.

I agree that your situation doesn't seem like the one where saying you love her is what will help you now, but we don't know the details of your relationship.

Some people seem to think it is never a good idea to express love so directly, but I am confident sometimes its good. Once I combined it with being physical close, and the next day she said: "you really opened up to me. I thought you didn't care so much, if you hadn't done that this would have been the last weekend we see each other."

Some girls really need to know you aren't keeping them at an arms length. They may be scared to get hurt. Especially if you appear to be the player type, which I'm unfortunately often judged for. It's all about feeling what she needs, be keen on details. If you are to tell her in the end, you need confidence your relationship will not be getting dull. Get creative afterwards.

I also want to know, how do you respond to when she says it first? Should I say it back?

Thanks guys. All your advice is much appreciated.

I decided not to say it in the end, the other day we had a little row during the day, and that night I rang her up after calming down and said "we need to talk" I later found out that at that moment, she thought I was going to break up with her, when in fact, I was just going to talk about the row and sort things out, which we did.

When she admitted she thought I was going to break up with her, she said she realized how much she does feel for me, and that she got scared and sad when she thought it might be over. I've decided not to say "I love you" but I instead said that I care about her a lot too, and that I like how things are with us. I then went around and fucked her. I'll leave it up to her to say it first, and I'll say it back if I feel it

typical.

now, if you can just make her feel this "fear" every day, she should love you passionately for all of eternity.

it's rather twisted.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

If I make her feel that fear daily, she will probably grow tired of the mind games and leave anyway. Surely?

yes, i was using reverse psychology.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Bump. A couple of us are still interested in these questions.