I open a chick in a bar/club/walking home from a club, speak for a while, raise my game with her, kiss and number close but then things turn a bit sour. How? Why? Where am I going wrong?

Example 1 (Nutty Chick - 8/10)
Girl has big crush on me, we text loads... I setup a date. Goes great, more dates follow. Things go great. One mess up then it all changes against me. I chase her a bit. Then tell her I CBA... she starts to chase me a little... I can't be bothered. She still messages although I am really off with her in the texts

Example 2 (Slightly Reserved Chick - 8/10)
Start chatting to a girl on way home from a club, stay chatting for 20 mins before she goes home, escalate with number and kiss close. Message her the next day with random comment about the night, Interest is there. Suddenly the texts stop... Sent a random message after about 2 weeks today saying 'Hows things in the life of you? x'... no response

Example 3 (Hot and Cool (So Far) Chick - 9.5/10)
Girl giving IOIs in the club, I put my arm out and she moves into my arm and kisses me, we talk etc. She even buys me a drink! End up with her all night in the club making out and talking. Start to head out for a taxi but then I back out (sort of) and we look for her friend (I want a relationship, not ONS). Next day comes and in the evening I drop her a text... lots of interest follows, add her on fb and hint at us going out (she says yeah). I message again whilst travelling a couple of days later and interest is still there (laughing, joking etc) so I make date plans. TBC due to her working hours (find out tomorrow). I text her today (a couple of days after last time we text each other) 'you up to anything exciting on your time off? Im back but been told to stay home by the Doc '... no response at all in about 5 hours

I see these correct things:
- Getting IOIs so acting on them
- Getting kiss closes
- Getting number closes
- Not jumping in for the lay as most girls may not want and neither do I
- Generating attraction/interest via testing - almost DHVing in these
- Arranging Day 2's in 2/3 of the examples

I'm no pickup artist - nor even an apprentice.. But check this:

Between these three girls, there are several things in common regarding the situation.. Look at the basic structure: "Fun Time" -> "Interest"; "kiss and number close" -> (to where your seeing a repeat scenario)...

The point i'm getting at is that you are "fun and ready" at first - but then your waiting too long, trying to make something of a "ONS" situation... Your game needs to be more congruent with what you are wanting. Whether that be short-term sex with someone you don't wanna settle down with.. or whether your wanting to go slow and really get to know someone before kissing them.. Just find your groove and what you really want - then stick to it

Is it possible for you to turn a ONS into a long-term thing? Yeah, tons of guys on this forum can help you with that area.. But i can't. I'm saying from my own experience that if you are going out to get a ONS - then with 2-3 days time your trying to flip it to a "potential" relationship, that you are gonna fail almost every time.

Thanks, I see what you mean but in the past this has worked (3 times - 2yr LTR, 4 month relationship, 3 month relationship) which is what I can't understand. I'm fine in the initial stages but now seem to hitting some block but can't work out what it is.

My experience of ONS have been just that and only that. One time we had a few dates after so I decided to go with the number/kiss closes and offer a day 2 if she was cool

I'm just wondering if I should call Example 3 when she finishes work or will this come across as needy seen as I messaged her with no response. Even though she noted that we would sort out Day 2 today?

With the 2yr relationship, 4 mo, 3mo - Are you still good friends with them? If no, try to be. If yes, ask them what attracted them to you. These girls will know you 100x better than any other female out there, and let's face it, your sister/mom won't give the best advice when it comes to dating. Once you find out what attracted them to you, you'll be able to focus on stuff that matters.
- This might give you the "missing link"??

Honestly, i think problems like the one you're facing are often disguised by that "one thing we did wrong".. But you're only gonna drive yourself nuts trying to figure out what it is. So what can you do? Simply focus on the generalized picture and adjust it from there, then ride it out - if it doesn't work - tweak it some more.. Trying to "fine tune" your game is more about practicing it over-and-over than it is about trying to change it by doing 1 thing differently... (exception: you noticed a specific action was a direct-correlation with a girl becoming turned-off to your presence) (Secondary note: Re the last parenthesis.. I really don't think the latter is your issue, read on)

The real reason i say that, is because a lot of guys are going to over-analyze the really simply shit, then they are gonna switch their game, go nuts from not getting the types of women they want, and then come running back here going "okay i hit a ___ with a HB10"... In most cases, women act based on feelings. If you can learn to guide those feelings to where you want them to be - in correlation to what you need them to be - not only can you get laid in minutes; but you can also find the one person that will complete you. And whether you want or don't want that, having that power is a rather special gift.

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I am good friends with two of three. One thing to add aswell is that I ended it with all three of them which I am still surprised they are friends

Anyway, so this Example 3 girl... I'm thinking of giving her a call as it just seems as though the texts stopped randomly. I wasn't being clingy (only texting every couple of days), wasn't being too under-responsive, was always being funny so everything was fine as I stated

I am not allowed to go out and game at the moment, Dr's orders so want to get a day 2 sorted for HB9.5

Would you leave a voicemail if she doesn't pick-up? If you don't leave a voicemail is it best to text again saying what you called about?

I feel like not fucking them is a complete incorrect move. Girls want to be fucked. 70% of the girls at clubs rnt looking for bfs they r looking for dick. Don't disappoint! What seems to be happening is you are creating a moment, capitalizing on it, then letting it all fade away. You are also meeting these girls at clubs. When they are at clubs, they are PRIMED! They senses are all super excited and their brain is firing on all cylinders. Think of the stimulation, the lights, the music, the whole floor shaking, the energy from everyone else, the alcohol, the guy who just slipped a finger in . Its hard to recreate that intense of an experience the next day or whenever. You have to go when you have the opportunity. Most of the girls wont be looking for relationships, but after you fuck them silly, who knows they may wanna lock u down.

Exactly.

As for calling/leaving a voicemail/etc.. Your analyzing this way too much. Do you wanna leave a voicemail? If so - do it. If not, fuck it. You gotta be the man here. I can't live in your shoes and tell you what actions to do or what actions not to do. All i can say is that you are already "undervaluing" yourself in the presence of this girl - which even though your seeing everything as the right move, that presence of having less value will KILL the attraction another person has for you. In turn, i think it would be best if you waited till you got an opportune reminder about her - but by the time that comes around naturally, it'll have been too late. Do you remember anything about what she was doing this week/anything you guys may have talked about?? Start there and see if you can find a reason for her to meet with you - then go there and mess with her in a respectfully fun way, get the energy flowing. If her heart is beating and pumping close to it's maximum potential - you're doing it right.

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