I'll keep this short

Pretext:
I met this hb on a night out and k+# closed, met her there again 2 nights later and took her back to hers..

At her place
we get some chinese food eat it, then go into the bedroom. we would make out for a bit then talk and repeat etc

hb: "we're not sleeping together"
me: "i cant beleive your already thinking about that!" etc

talk some more, make out

hb: "i don't want you to think i'm easy"
me: reframe her as constantly thinking about sex [mistake i think here]

we keep making out for short periods then cuddling.. she was always the one to finish the short make outs [another mistake, shld take away etc]

hb: "i love that you don't want to sleep with me"
me: "i never said that, just wanted to get to know you more first"

I then get her horny by talking about sex etc blah blah blah

hb: "stop it i'm getting turned on"
me: i just carry on etc

eventually we started getting more intamate with groping etc but then she stopped, we talked then we just ended up sleeping..

i stayed a bit in the morning, then left

we spent pretty much the whole night talking, comfort stuff when i wanted us to be doing other stuff

WHAT NOW??
Where should i proceed from here?? text her, wait for her to text me

How should i play the texts?? ie be quite sexual or, disinterested, game
(i think i struggle at showing interest when i should)

I really would appreciate some help, as i really thought i would fclose and am annoyed as i know i fucked up but not sure where, but i just want to know where to go from here?

thanks
st

To me, it sounds like you are getting in a LTR.

_________________
Dear Optimist, Pessimist & Realist,

Just to let you know that while you guys were arguing about the glass of water...... I drank it!

Sincerely, the Opportunist

Thanks for the lightning reply..

I know and I dont want an LTR.. i even told her as part of my game "i just got out of a relatinoship as i realised i just don't want one at my age"..

thanks a lot for the advice man..anyone have any thoughts on what to do now??

we're both going back home this summer (both live abroad) so i dont think its on the cards, and i really dont want one (im always a sucker and end up in one!)..

How do i reframe it in texts, be very sexual and dominant..lots of attraction as opposed to comfort i think....is it too late?

I am new to the forum. I want to say thanks for teaching me something new: Always give her the impression your not after sex immediately i.e. I can't believe you are already thinking about that... Thanks mate. p.s. huge apologies for not contributing anything useful.

If you see her in person. I suggest you learn more about NLP (Neuro-Linguistic-Programming), tell her a couple of pattern.

She will be more likely to accept what you offer her (Which is Casual sex without strings attached, If I understood correctly).


Here's an example:


Natural Woman pattern

Mindlist:


"Do you think most men know what women really want?"
Of course, she'll just laugh.
"I think most men might THINK they know, but I think almost every man makes one, huge, critical
mistake when it comes to women..."
(Now THAT should get them intrigued.)
"The mistake is that they don't recognize that in each woman their are actually TWO women... the natural
woman and the culturally programmed woman. The culturally programmed woman is the one with all the
rules and all the roles... all the restrictions, constrictions... all the shouldn'ts, shoulds, don'ts, can'ts,
mustn'ts...etc.
But the natural woman....that's the woman right there at the core... where you keep your most exciting
memories... where you ponder fantasies... daydreams... amazing possibilities... the things you'd do if no
one were watching and no one... even your best friends... would ever, ever know about...
Most men just do things that trigger the culturally programmed woman... But when a man... a rare man...
can touch a woman in that special place in all those special ways you LONG to be touched... in ways
you maybe even can't admit to yourself... then WOW... an almost complete transformation takes place...
and you start blossoming way beyond what you ever even thought possible.
So I think the smart man is the man who has the realization that that place is there... waiting and longing...
even inspite the fact that women often have to lock all of that away... and yet they are still there..."

_________________
Dear Optimist, Pessimist & Realist,

Just to let you know that while you guys were arguing about the glass of water...... I drank it!

Sincerely, the Opportunist

Has anyone had this before.. was it like going all in.. so my questions is:

Do you think this situation is salvagable or is it blown?

I think it is absolutely salvageable.. i've been in the same position many times and usally always ended up f-closing.. i would advise a push pull method. don't over pursue. keep her on her toes.. make her wonder what your thinking.. once you've made it obvious the fun of the game is over.. but play it to closed off and she will think u aren't interested!! make the romance a adventure! also try some phone game in order to get better results when texting her.. there are some great examples on this site!!! she obviously wanted to sleep with you that night but didn't want you to think she was a slut... also the NLP advise was great to!!
best of luck man

she gave a blunt response? Maybe just ask her if she fancies having sex? If that's what you want from her, and she's a blunt girl