Salut!

Guys, I have never thought I will write a topic in that section of forum but as it comes out I am not as experienced as I think.

I'm seeing this girl like once a month (for a couple of days) since New Years party - for the background see my journal 2-vt79972.html?start=15 and read the report of this night with HB8. I then thought I could have sex with her, I was wrong as it comes out.

Every time we see each other we sleep together, every single day. It's been 3 meetings = 10 days, 8 nights = ~160 hours together. It looks like I have somehow missed the 7-hour rule.

Anyway, since our second night together I am stopped at one point: LMR. And not a regular one, it's sort of Chernobyl radiation affected LMR. I mean, the closest I went was her with only panties on, kissing and so, and then sacramental "No". And it's like that on every single night, 7 times if I'm right. I tried everything: facebook freeze-out, making her hornier, laughing at her immaturity ("I guess you're over 15, right?", "Come on, we're not 12-year olds", "Haha, ok, it's my turn to act like a child") and nothing works. She always stops me.

I can give you more details: She's 2,5 year single and she claims she haven't had sex since she's single. Ok, maybe her hymen is reviving but it's not an argument for me. She says it's because she doesn't want to be seen as slut and so... At the same time I recently told her I had sex 2 weeks ago and it's no big deal for me. And I believe that despite all this kissing and stuff none of us truly admits it's a relationship.

I don't want her as an exclusive girlfriend (logistics) but it would be nice to see once a month and have a good time together, on the other hand she looks like she needs to know what kind of ground she's stepping at and be sure no one will think of her as a slut. And if I can tell, she's not even near to that. We have some powerful connection, we laugh all the time, we kiss and hold hands but for me it's normal, for her not as I think.

Any suggestions?

Salut!

Surielx.

_________________
An Alpha male cries only when Mufasa dies.
Personal thread: lr-s-surielxs-crazy-adventures-vt79972.html

She probably knows exactly whats going on and what you want. It isn't THAT unusual for a girl to withhold sex until the relationship is clearly exclusive. If she isn't giving you what you want, take the relationship back a level to friendship and let it go.

You can't make someone have sex with you if they don't want to. Not everyone sees sex as a casual thing. Some people hold onto those no-sex ideas really tenaciously.

But also, props to you for not lying to her to get her in the sack.

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -

Salut!

Ok, some clarification. She isn't sure "What are we?", so I will state the unexclusiveness of our relationship but get this: she's afraid that having sex with a guy she kisses and sleeps with for 3 months is somehow related to the "slut" subject. I can't figure in what context; if it will be HER feeling like a slut, the environment or she thinks that I will see her as a slut. Or these three together. How do I make her rationalize the process?

Salut!

Surielx.

_________________
An Alpha male cries only when Mufasa dies.
Personal thread: lr-s-surielxs-crazy-adventures-vt79972.html

This doesn't change my answer. She won't have sex unless she is in a committed relationship. Many people feel this way. Hell, many people won't have sex until they get married. It isn't a rational decision; it is a personal choice.

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -

this chick is nuts. i guarantee she likes sex. she's not a virgin, so she has been fucked before. i guarantee she strokes her beaver once to twice per day. if she isn't into INTERCOURSE, is she open for anything else? oral? hands? mutual? i mean .... come one!

what red-blooded 25 year old woman doesn't like orgasms.

i would say "i don't want to have sex with you, but i really want to give you pleasure" and convince her to let you go down on her.

we all know that ends with penetration!

lolol

ok, so i'm horrible. but i know somebody is going to agree with me.

Salut!

Guys, thanks for your help, I can see you make the path a bit clearer.

@Wal: She wants sex, she just can't get over the "slut" thing. It's rather about this than the relationship thing, she has never gone into that subject but she mentioned "slut" subject two times.

@Mack 2.0: That "somebody" you called...

I totally agree with you, I may try oral first. But I want to be prepared for her next "No" so I need to find a way to speak to her emotions to help her get over this ridiculous "slut" thoughts and omit the I-will-tell-anything-to-have-sex aura. Any suggestions?

It's rather the situation when she (in simplicity) tells me "I don't want to be considered slut" - What to answer?

Salut!

Surielx.

_________________
An Alpha male cries only when Mufasa dies.
Personal thread: lr-s-surielxs-crazy-adventures-vt79972.html

tell her "i agree. i don't want to be a slut either. so let us not have sex. but let me give you the pleasure that you need. and we will save the sanctity of sex for later"

Nice!

Just slowly build it up. She obviously believes that having sex outside of a committed relationship would make her a slut, or at least make her feel like a slut, so build it slowly and make sure she knows you're discreet (you won't go around town blabbing about how she did this or that) and that you never see her as a slut... Good luck mang.

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -

or just pull your meat out and spank it right in front of her and say "join in or watch. choice is yours."

Your name should Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -

Salut!
The truth is she has never had sex outside a relationship, maybe these are her thoughts but the question is how to convince her she wouldn't and, more important, how to make her not feel like that. Connection between us is great but these stereotypes must be abandoned.
Discretion! Right, I need to convey that and tell her no girl resisted me for so long yet. It's good, thanks.
The concept is very good although the word "but" worries me. I will say something in that way, other words. Good point, thanks.
This^^

Thanks guys! Any other thoughts?

Salut!

Surielx.

_________________
An Alpha male cries only when Mufasa dies.
Personal thread: lr-s-surielxs-crazy-adventures-vt79972.html

Okay, but you may not be able to impose your beliefs about sex on her.

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -

men have convincing women to have sex since the beginning of time. in fact, i've come to believe it's the natural order of things.