I'm new with to the online dating seen, I just need some help with these girls:

Hot Emo Girl, out of state, Objective: target practice/seeing more of that hot bod
Me: If vegetarians can't harm anything, how can a vegetarian be a princess? I thought all princesses had a dark side?
Her: I do have a dark side, but she only comes out at special times. Rawr!
Me: I never had a girl try to seduce me with dinosaur sounds before. Is that your special brand of kinky?
Her: Dinosaurs are hella sexy. But that's just my opinion. Think about it... do you know what it feels like to be caught up in a cataclysmic explosion that causes you to forever have a fossilized bone? Exactly.

Sexy Book Nerd Local Area, Objective: New Friend and/or Sexy Sex
Me:(Paraphrasing here) Story of when I messed with a cashier at walmart while buying a machete. I told the cashier my uncle just got out of prison.
Her: She's right, that's a horrible idea. Your prison-hardened uncle could surely wrest it away from you and then where would you be? Probably chopped into pieces and buried in the woods. That's where.

6 Foot Beauty Local Area, Objective: Sexy Sex, Too soon to tell if worth it as platonic
Me: Things I hear far too often:
"You're Tall," Response, "You are wearing pants."
"Do you play basketball?" Response, "Do you ride horses?"
Do you have anything whitty for the "How's the weather there?"
Her: LOL
Well it depends on how nasty you want to get...
"How's the weather up there?" "About to rain..."
"Why don't you climb up here and see..."
"It's great above the clouds! How is it down there in the real world with the common people??"

MILF Local Area, Objective: Target Practice/Sexy Sex
Me: How's it going? Sorry for a bland intro, I have to send out so many of these.
Her: Hey, no worries, you are a cutie, but a lil' outta my age range.
Me: But i need someone to buy beers for me!
Her: Aww... meet me at the corner liquor store in an hour and I'll get you some... Pabst OK?? ha ha ha..

I have a few other conversations going, but these are the one's I'm currently stumped on. I'm posting here because of how well the "But I need someone to buy beers for me!" line worked. Thanks for the help guys!

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I am but the student in the presence of the masters...

Hey dude you're opening well but you now need to transition off the the openers, usually there's something in their profile that you can ask about, tease about. So there's no advice I can directly give as you need to be getting to know them a bit, but check out qualification and comfort stuff with the aim of getting a date or digits.

I've found casually mentioning facebook leads them to asking, oh you've got facebook, add me... You can then take it off the dating site and escalate on facebook.