Ok, this post came out quite long, but read it through.

First of all, I usually dont come to forums to ask such things, I work them out myself but this time I really need good advice, because I really starting to get into this girl. She has got into my head, and thats not good, like my friend said.
This girl is certainly at least 9 in your terms, but thats not most important.

So we met eachother in summer while working at the same place, after a while she and her friend quit and they gave me their msn. So i started talking, things were going great, we were talking always when we both were online, talked and flirted hours almost every night. So after a while she invited me over to her place, I didnt go because it was like 1:00 AM and she lives 30min drive away and i had to go to work next day, same thing happend few times. (not an excuse, just decided not to)

So school started, we were getting along better and better, again she invited me over few times, I would have gone for sure, but due to some VERY BAD and STUPID COINCIDENCE I didnt, I couldnt. Usually we both were busy, busy with school and workout. Then school break came and she said she´s going to visit a friend for a week, who lives in other country (it was her boyfriend, i found out from others). While she was there she contacted me asking how im doing and that she has thinking about me.
So break was over, school went on and we keep talking in msn, everyting was good. She´s saying things like "Can it all be so great, it must have a catch", I say "I dont know, thats up to you to figure out". We were having alot of fun, both enjoing that. Still havent meet... busy, busy, busy.

So finally, after 4-5 month, before christmas we meet up, I go to her place I bring a cake too, coz long time no seeing and she´s like "Oh, thats my favourite!" We were having great time, laughing, she was playing with her hair constantly, eye contact all the time, she had candles lit etc. (but i didnt touch her or kiss, i usually dont do this at first time i meet with girl) we both were little shy maybe because we havent seen eachother for so long. Anyway time flies and she says "Oh, i have to kick you out now... the house rule you know" (they have this time limit for visitors) Anyway i was there way longer than was allowed. When I left I was so exited or something...I dont know, I didnt even give her hug or kiss goodbye, just said goonight with wink while looking over shoulder at her. On the walk home i was thinking ahh, wtf i just did, more like what I didnt do.
Next day everyting is great, shes telling me "Next time I wont let you go before the cake is finished, things will get rough " We still cointiniue to get along great, just like before, while we talk on msn shes clearly investing way more that i am.

Earlier on that day her bf posts a video on his facebook profile Dan Balan - Justify sex... and commented "Enjoy " So maybe she had told him that she was meeting me, but i dont know.
She and her bf talks in english to eachother, the guy is different nationality than her and me. Also he is 30-ish, we both are 21.

Then few weeks back we having great conversating like always, she mentioned a friend is coming to visit her from other other country (I knew it was her boyfrined, but i didnt tell). After that next time we spoke she started turning cold, she started throwing things like

Cut from convo:

I: so just spending quiet evening
Her: Jup, what else i got to do
I:I dont know, you have to know that..theres plenty of things to do
Her: I didnt say that you have to know
I: youre right
Her: just in case, to avoid misunderstandings in the future

at first i tought that everyones having bad days once in a while, kept talking. I asked her is everyting okay, you have changed... She said "Dunno, Im still the same, nothing has changed" So i quit on this topic.
Now last time we talked she said she said she´s studying and was like icecold, basically one word replies from her. So i told her that i understand she need to study and ended convo.

I know that her boyfrined must have told or done her something to cause her to be like this towards me, atleast i think.

Now i havent talked to her couple of days. Im thinking of what to do, maybe give her some time alone, dont initiate contact with her for couple of weeks or ask her to meet up soon, something like " hey, I havent seen you in ages, we should meet sometimes, how about ...... " and see how she is in person and tell her what i feel and what i want. Maybe something about valentines day, but thats far away...
I havent exaclty told her that i like her, but im sure she knows that. I know she likes me aswell, I can tell that.

Any advice what you think is best thing to do, I dont want to be needy or desperate, never. I dont want to lose her for ever too.

Well you really missed your window of opportunity by failing to take control. She invited into her life and you did nothing. This was the pattern and she has no reason to think it will ever change. She already has someone and even if she likes you better a woman will choose having something with a okay guy rather than having nothing with an awesome guy.

I give this advice all the time because it was given to me and turned a bad situation very good fast.

I had a gf that I liked but I was in a weird place in life and I was very submissive, indecisive and slow to take action/control. She sent me a message saying she wanted to get together sometime that week and I KNEW it was to breakup. I told my friend the whole situation and he said

"You have given her signals that you are a weak man. She wants you to be more assertive and take control of the relationship. Just write her back this "I'll pick you up tomorrow at 9pm. Wear black""

We didn't break up that night and it was the BEST sex we ever had together. Read The Way of the Superior Man to get an idea of why this worked so well.

I think your situation is very similar but a little different so I have to edit a little, try writing this.

I want to see you. I'm going to come by on _____ so we can catch up. Wear something cute.

The worst thing that can happen is she says no. If she says no then it probably wasn't a situation you could fix anyway.

_________________
You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

Thanks for the reply.
I think thats what i need to do, im going to message her in couple of days to meet her next week and see what will happen.

Good Man! let me know how it goes down with a PM if you would.

_________________
You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

Or post it here!

I'd like to know too

Whiskey
P.S. I've had generally good luck with this tactic in slightly different situations,.. on a 5th or 6th date I've told a woman almost nothing about the date, other than to dress comfortable and when I'm picking her up. Those have been some of the most fun dates I've had,.. for me of course,.. but mostly for her! You can almost feel how into it, and more importantly into you she is,.. even if you just end up taking her to an artwalk.

Hey man I think your problem is hesitating in making a move on her.

When she gives away so many IOIs, it is a mistake not to make a sexual move on her and that is a huge turn off for her as you come off as diffident and unattractive.

When there is a bf involved in the situation, there is often too much risk for the girl to take, so it is not simply emotional, it involves lots of cognitive process when she weighs the options between you and her boyfriend. I know she must have fallen for you and thought of ditching the bf, but when you hesitating, she knew that she could not rely on you for support and thus she chooses the safer option of sticking with the current boyfriend.

I have faced this situation before and made quite similar mistake as you do so learn from your mistake and move on man

Cheers

This.

_________________
SEX Technique Material http://bit.ly/iFdky0

FREE PDF w Openers, Date ideas and Videos on Direct: http://www.sashapua.com

Its been a while, almost forgot the theard here.
I messaged her that Im going to come by on weekend, just as you said. Later that night she came ot talk with me on msn

Her: what plans do you have here
Me: I told you
Her: without consulting with me
Her: but you dont know where I am at that time
Me: thats why I let you know, so you wouldnt be anywhere else
Her: I meant the city
Me: going somewhere?

she said that she doesnt know yet where shes going to be, her girlfriend knows. They are maybe going somewhere. I just said "ok, what a pity for all that fun thats not going to happen now...some other time then",
she aswered: "Its not nice to do the plans that concern me without me " negging me??

I just told her to let me know where shes going to be

Alright, Im on my way out with other girl today to have a fun night. But this girl I like is on my mind all the time, well... I think I give her a call tomorrow if she hasnt replyed me by then (when I said Ill be coming over) and say something like "Hey troublemaker, listen, I got few hours of free time. Ill come by so we can talk".

As i said earlier she mentioned to have plans with her female friends. Should I do it or not?

hell no, wait one more day...