Hello My PUA Brothers in Crime,

Went sarging again yesterday at a wedding. Spitting game has become natural now, and approach anxiety is simply an annoyance. It's funny because the groom was a typical AFC who took his bride back after she cheated on him and had a kid with another guy. Sadly, I've seen this fate for so many AFC's out there who end up just taking what they can get.

Anyways, I realize I have a serious sticking point that's hurting my game and I was hoping to ask for all your help on his. DJ, I hope this post gets to you well because your last post on "The Creed" was awesome and really need your help.

My skills as a new PUA is getting stronger every day. I feel like I'm pretty good at storytelling, misinterpretations, DHVs, kino escalation, etc., but the one fatal flaw I have is that I suck at NEGGING.

I thinks it's because less than 3 mths ago, I was building an unsuccessful life off of supplicating to women and never threw out a neg before. It doesn't feel natural and when I try, it seems very incongruent.

I think part of it is because I'm unsure exactly the theory behind negging. I know it's a way to lower a HB's perception of her own value while you are showing DHV. But what makes up a good neg? Is a neg kind of like what we call "bagging on someone"? Does a neg have to be a true "putdown" to make a HB self-conscious about a flaw she has OR can it be a playful tease about something that doesn't hurt her that much (eg. teasing a HB10 about her looks when everyone knows she's a 10). Is a neg a statement where you "accidentally" point out DLV in a HB and make it seem like it was unintentional?

Anyways, I suck at negs, but I know they're crucial to having strong game. So if you guys can help me in ANY way with this, I'd greatly appreciate it. Any clarification on the theory behind what constitutes a neg, particularly would be very helpful.

Thanks a million, guys.


Respectfully,

M

So, at first, my opinion says nothing is crucial if you play other right. I have seen very good guys playing without negs. But I agree, negs make game easier and funnier.

Negs are commonly divided into three groups;
shotgun negs
sniper negs
tease negs

Shotgun negs are the ones that convey the "i don't think about you as a romantic partner" attitude. They are useful during the approach and female-to-male interest. They show you are not into her or that she is not interesting enouh to earn your time. So they demonstrate higher value. But I think it is not good idea to excuse target out of conversation completely, cause she may get mad at you for not-letting her talk with friends. But that's my opinion. Great combo with cocky, slightly rude voice.

Sniper negs are the ones that embarass her, make her think that she did a DLV. Very useful for HB10, because they are used to be just perfect in front of guys -> they shoot the bitch shield down. Use them in calm and confident voice, or the wow, look at this voice.

Tease negs are least embarassing, mostly used during flirting. Great to create sexual tension, by subtle clues. They're just calling for response. Almost every neg can be tease neg, it all depends of playful tone of voice.



For end, I recommend negging to shoot bitchie shield down, and during flirting. Tease it a little, be playful, but don't overdo. Also, if they're used on a low self-esteem girl, you will lose rapport instead of gaining it.

Just look at girl, and find something to comment on. And, try not to explain. Maximally say "it was a joke", and ONLY TO TEASE NEGS.. Act as if it is her problem, not yours.

Keep us posted.

_________________
You don't know the future, you can't change the past. The only thing that matters is THE CURRENT MOMENT.

Thanks, Paeter.

Highly appreciate your help.


Respectfully,

M

Of course negs will feel uncomfortable; it's something you've been trained not to do for years.

In Style's DVD "The Annihilation Method," he recommends taking every bit and pushing it beyond your own comfort zone. Try negging a girl until she walks away pissed off; it will teach you about female limits. You've already tried not using negs, so you see how that works. Use blatant, borderline offensive negs. Use subtle negs. Neg the group. Neg yourself.

Everyone's game is different, even using the same material. I may be able to sniper neg really well but shotgun negs may pigeon hole me; whatever. Find what works best for you, and when you think you've bombed out of a set push it 20% farther. You learn by failing far more than succeeding.

Guess that's not much help... but it's the best advice I can offer. Keep negging until it feels strange not negging.

Good hunting
~Grayson

you want to be playful when you neg; dont insult her, and dont wait for a response;
like when youre in the middle of DHVing glance over at her like you just noticed something "you got a eye booger" then just continue on with your story like you didnt even give it a second thought;
a neg is suppose to bring down her social value, and make her feel insecure about herself, while you dhv (display higher value) and raise your social value which causes her to become attracted to you

here is something from my notes by the man that invented negs
Mystery



NEG
Mystery writes about NEG HIT Theory!

HERE IS HOW:
A 10 is there surrounded by friends. She has put on this BITCH act. Is she REALLY a bitch? Unlikely. All my girlfriends were wonderful human beings - beautiful people have it easier because they are beautiful and often times have better upbringings because of it. BUT - they need to have a standard with which to uphold when all these NOBODY guys approach her. So her values are very honed and understood. When a man walks up and says, "can I buy you a beer?" she WILL be annoyed by this. While the guy thinks he's doing something nice for her, she gets this ALL the time. She is desensitized to this. You are the 8th guy TODAY! So she is very good at brushing all these guys off. Shit, she HAS to be... she isn't going to sleep with ALL of them! So she may say NO or act annoyed and then the guy thinks she's a bitch and walks off pissed and feeling like a failure. And that seems to work. Sometimes when the girl is particularly in a feeling of control (like in a club where she is PREPARED for the barrage of men - it IS after all something that occurs so often that when it is GONE she MISSES it)
she will accept the beer and then flake the guy off. Hey, the guys are stupid enough to buy her one, she might as well take it. When they take a beer from you, the girl is saying to you, "I don't know you and I don't care about you. You are just another one of those typical guys and since I dont respect you, Ill take the beer from you before I snub you."

I was with my friend Diane (the 10) and her cute friend (an 8.5 maybe I guess). A guy came up and asked, "I don't mean to bother you but would you like to dance with me?" The 8.5, not being used to this said, "ummm, ahhh ..." and the guy gave a puppy dog look and I was smiling at her knowing how pathetic the guy was so I saw the humor in the situation and the girl said, "ummm, why not. sure." The guy said, "REALLY? are you SURE? Wow, I NEVER get girls to dance with me." What a
pathetic loser. She started talking with Diane and the guy just standing there and they never went for the dance. weird eh? He then said ... to ME... "Can I buy her a beer?" I said, "you can buy ME a beer ... but you'll have to ask HER." At this point I knew he was being a hassle to her, she wasn't interested in the slightest and felt uncomfortable. I thought is was great to see this occur in front of me - it was highly educational and more so entertaining. So I say, "Hey, the guy wants to buy you a beer " I'm getting into this now hahahaa. It was great. The girl goes, "ummm, no thank you." Now Diane (the 10) says, "yes, she'll take the beer." So he buys her a beer. And then he never talks to her again! Weird eh? Well that's how it went down.

I digressed. oh well, steady stream of text from my brain ... Ill trudge on (sorry reader) ... since a 10 is so GOOD at snuffing your approach (nothing ever personal either - it is a strategy that is built over years of stupid guys approaches EVERY FUCKING DAY, she will do the same to YOU. That is why SNUFFING THEM is important. You cant INSULT them because they are used to all the hurt guys INSULTING them (ahh you are nothing but a bitch!) so this rolls off their back like water off a muskrats ass. How do you SNUFF them without INSULTING them? Well, let's say she has long nails which are most likely
fake. Now why do 10s dress so FINE if they don't want the attention? Because they LOVE the feeling of control sometimes. They are in a club with friends and they want to be the leader of the circle (social hierarchy in primates) and so she gets all the attention. The guys come and buy drinks for them and she gets off on knocking the guys down. Its all in a days play. Ok, so she is wearing fake nails to look even BETTER! Most guys will say, "wow you are so beautiful." BORING, typical and in her mind by now (after years of the same shit) TRUE. Imagine a guy comes along and says, "nice nails? are they real?" she will have to concede, "no. acrylic." and you say (like you didn't notice it was a put down), "oh. (pause) well I guess they still
LOOK good." Then he turns his back to her.

What does this do to her? Well, he didn't treat her like shit and INSULT her. He complimented her but the result was to target her insecurity. She thinks, "IM HOT IM BEAUTIFUL (especially in that emotional state of control as in the public)... but I didn't win this guy over. IM SO GOOD at this. ILL just fix that little smear on my image that he has of me." then you continue to show disinterest in her looks as you giveher a neutral topic like the Elvis script. During this her intention is to get you to become like all the other guys so she can feel in control and snuff you and you then give her another NEG HIT like this ... "is that a hair piece? well, its neat ... what do you call this hairstyle? The waffle? " Smile and look at her to show her you are sincerely being funny and not insulting. You are pleasant but disinterested in her beauty. This will intrigue her because she KNOWS guys. And this isn't normal. You must have really high taste, or be used to girls or be married or something. These questions make her CURIOUS. So this keeps happening and is known as FLIRTING. She give you little neg hits and these tests are qualifiers. You pass them by neg hitting her back. After all, you aren't like the others showing interest. But ... why?

To get control again she says, "will you buy me a drink?" notice how she is trying to get you now! BUT, she only wants to sucker you in enough so she can SNUFF you. That is all she is about - this strategy is all she knows and it's not working for you so she is trying to do damage control on the situation. But at the same time she doesn't quite understand WHY you don't think you are great. After all, her nails ARE fake. You say, "ahhh, thats so funny ... you nose moves when you speak... (pointing and being cute) look there it goes again ... its so ... quaint ... hheeeee looky" She'll say, "ahhh, stoppp blush*.
Now she is self conscious and having her in this state is where you want her. You have with 3 neg hits successfully created INTEREST (curiosity) and removed her from her pedestal (removed her bitch shield.) You were humorous, you had a smile, you dress well, you are confident and everything she would want in a man.

You didn't take her shit. OH, and when she asked you for a beer, you said, "no. I don't buy girls drinks. but you can buy ME one." You are qualifying HER now. If she buys you a beer, this is symbolic of her RESPECT for you.

If not you say, "pleasure meeting you" and turn your back to her again. DONT walk away, just turn your back. You are neg hitting them again just when they thought she was negging YOU. That is teasing each other. That is the first step to flirting. This is all textbook psychology. Simple stuff and it works enough for me to have had 58 girls in 6 years.

A NEG HIT is a qualifier. The girl is FAILING to meet your high expectations. It's not an insult, just a judgement call on your part. The better looking the girl, the more aggressive you must be with using neg hits. A 10 can get 3 neg hits up front, while an 8 only 1 or 2 over a longer time. You CAN go overboard if they think you are BETTER than them You can drop the self-esteem right from under them (just like most 10s do to guys) and this isn't good. You have to get as close to the breaking point as you can without crossing the line. Once you have gotten her RIGHT THERE, you can start appreciating things about her (NEVER LOOKS). There is a mutual RESPECT now. Something most guys never get from the girl.

This is how you remove a bitch shield 3 neg hits oughta do it within 2 or 3 minutes of neutral chat. Once it is down, you can from a mutual respect place, seduce her.

_________________
People seeking to excel have continuous barriers to overcome.
~Live the life you love~

I had exactly the same problem, so what i did was I used a regular neg (i.e your nose wiggles) , i let her burn for a few seconds, then followed it up with "I'm just joking it doesn't really!" this made me more confident in sounding sincere with the neg itself as i knew i was retracting the statement soon anyway, and it still counted as a tease neg. Eventually i just said it the same way but left out the "just joking" bit. give it a try

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Hi! Can I buy you ...um...drink..you want one? A drink, can i buy you one? CAN I BUY YOU A DRINK! No?...ok