Ok so I used the direct approach email, it worked great. Then I talked to her on IM and got the # close. Just texted her today and she wants to hang out this weekend.

Now normally you don't walk right up and hug someone you are meeting for the first time. With online dating you get to know the person and have a higher level of comfort when you first meet.

So what is appropriate, how much kino should be used right away.

I go straight for a hug, not a full on crotch to crotch, but I'm a warm guy that's comfortable with contact. Make sure you smile at first eye contact, I tend to fuck that up because I'm still sizing the girl up. If she offers a hand, I laugh it off and put it on her, this isn't a business meeting, she's not here to prepare my taxes.

I've had one time where going for an immediate hug went bad, the girl stopped dead removed my arm and said, "Nuh-uh, not yet." Which I gave her a weird look for and laughed off. That girl was way eccentric, though. Ended well, tender make out an hour later, real sweet girl. A hug is friendly and in no way a big deal, just make sure you smile first.

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31 and still figuring it out.

this isn't really an online-dating question...but

it's a fake comfort though because you only know each other in a limited context and you don't know the whole. body language which accounts for roughly 45% of communication was missing in your previous interactions.

So generally in the beginning I'd say none. at this point you're still figuring her out. think of kino like a reward for later if she seems to be into you and you're still interested. still you shouldn't shy away from closeness per se. like if you sit down sit next to her not across from her. don't walk around with your hands in your pockets lol.

last good date I had I played it totally cool for some hours, but we did sit next to each other in a bar and on a bench and having some food and then a bit later surprisingly she grabbed my hand first.

I'd say use as much kino as you feel comfortable with. If you can hug a girl straight away, I bet she will love it, will ease some of her nerves and worries in an instant. Having no fear at first is a very dominant thing to have.

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Been there, done it, oh and still doing it!

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