Building Confidence to have direct game



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PostPosted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 1:36 pm 
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Joined: Wed Dec 16, 2009 2:06 am
Posts: 54
No easy way around it, just get out there and start saying hi :).
And i think that using an opinion opener BEFORE going in direct defeats the purpose of going in direct lol, no offense.

Things i've noticed with all my direct practice you can be aware of.

- Shows more confidence
- Nowadays its actually quite refreshing to girls
- cuts through a lot of games and bullshit
- you are more congruent just because you are not acting out anything
- if you want one nighter, probably not the best, id just act out whatever her fantasy
man is for that night.
- A lot of times (in my experience) after going in direct a bit of calibration needs to
be done
- For HB9s+ keep in mind this happens to them a lot. Find a way to be different
and try to catch off - guard.
- Dont have to play the whole confident act, playing nervous builds a lot of
comfort and girls tend to meet half way(found this out by actually being nervous)
but it depends on the girl.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 7:12 pm 
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Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2008 7:53 pm
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Quote:
- For HB9s+ keep in mind this happens to them a lot. Find a way to be different
and try to catch off - guard.
I thought most approached girls are like Hb7-8 and not hb9-10 (because less people have courage to pproach hb10 than hb8 or so)


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 10:35 pm 
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I know everyone says that but man i see alot of confident guys approaching the hot girls, this however is just my observation.


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 19, 2010 2:40 pm 
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Hey John,
I'm new to this too, however i've found that after a while public humiliation is something you laugh about and shouldn't be feared. There are a few ways to alleviate approach anxiety without even involving ladies.

Often my friends and I have these little games we play in public to pass the time, basically you get points for how awkward a situation you get yourself in. Games like 'Knock and don't run', 'ghosting', or my favourite... 'strip bench' (where the setting is a park bench, and you get points for each item of clothing you take off until you are confronted by the other person on the bench, your points double once you get down to underwear, triple points for dancing on bench etc.).

How does this help you approach women? Well you start to associate the public humiliation with with humor, if you can play stupid games like this with your buddies, approaching girls will be a breeze. Also, after diving into these embarrassing situations, if a conversation starts getting awkward with a girl, you're less likely to freeze up and you feel more comfortable dealing with awkwardness which you are now so very accustomed to...

So my advice is to dress yourself up as a human sized boob, head down to the mall and start ghosting people haha.

This type of thing worked for me, but obviously it isn't for everybody.
good luck ;)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2010 3:00 am 
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Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 5:46 am
Posts: 210
Location: Sunshine Coast, Australia
Quote:
Hey John,
I'm new to this too, however i've found that after a while public humiliation is something you laugh about and shouldn't be feared. There are a few ways to alleviate approach anxiety without even involving ladies.

Often my friends and I have these little games we play in public to pass the time, basically you get points for how awkward a situation you get yourself in. Games like 'Knock and don't run', 'ghosting', or my favourite... 'strip bench' (where the setting is a park bench, and you get points for each item of clothing you take off until you are confronted by the other person on the bench, your points double once you get down to underwear, triple points for dancing on bench etc.).

How does this help you approach women? Well you start to associate the public humiliation with with humor, if you can play stupid games like this with your buddies, approaching girls will be a breeze. Also, after diving into these embarrassing situations, if a conversation starts getting awkward with a girl, you're less likely to freeze up and you feel more comfortable dealing with awkwardness which you are now so very accustomed to...

So my advice is to dress yourself up as a human sized boob, head down to the mall and start ghosting people haha.

This type of thing worked for me, but obviously it isn't for everybody.
good luck ;)
Ghosting is the bomb. God Bless Hamish and Andy :)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2010 3:10 am 
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Joined: Sun Dec 19, 2010 1:36 pm
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AOL: Adelaide
Location: Australia
Quote:

Ghosting is the bomb. God Bless Hamish and Andy :)
Haha yeah they're hilarious, have you seen their 3 step ding dong dash game? It's quality.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2010 9:50 pm 
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Joined: Sun Sep 20, 2009 1:14 pm
Posts: 27
hey direct and pranksta,

just wanna say thanks for your posts. your advice is much appreciated.

i thiink i need to work on my inner game a bit though.

thanks again,

John


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 2:13 pm 
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Joined: Wed Feb 18, 2009 3:39 am
Posts: 11
In my opinion, the only way to get around apporach anxiety, is doing a lot of approaches. But as PlayHer Man already advised, take baby steps. It's like a muscle that you build up. You don't start with the heavy weights, but with smaller ones and then build it up.

I had a time in which I didn't do any approaches for a couple of months, and when I got back into the Game, my AA was basically at the same level where it used to be (which was really bad). In fact, it was probably even worse, because I was supposed to know all this stuff and get good results, which fucked me up even more. So I went back to basics and imposed newbie missions on myself. Here is my workout plan:

First round: You have 12 minutes to approach 10 sets. Walk up to them, say something like "Hi, how is it going, have a merry Christmas ..." and walk away. Your goal is not to start a conversation, but simply talk AT them and walk away. The time constraint is key here. It sets a goal that has nothing to do getting the girl. It makes you independant of the outcome.

Second round: Same time, same amount of sets. Use an indirect opener. Ask their opinion about something, let them answer and leave.

Third round: Same time, same amount of sets. Use a direct opener. Walk up to a girl, make her a compliment (I like your outfit/ style/ whatever else or simply say that you think she is cute/ gorgeous/...) and leave. You don't need to wait for a reaction. The point is to simply force yourself to do it.

Fourth and last round: This time there is no time limit, but do this at least five times. Use a direct opener on a girl that is surrounded by people (for example at a busstation).

I did this a short time ago on a shopping street during the Christmas period. It is best to have a wing with you who can hold you accoutnable. You can also think up creative punichments in case you don't make it in the time limit. This plan was inspired by the website www.mypuajourney.com. But I adapted it to my specific needs.

Have fun,
Nemo


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Dec 31, 2010 5:43 pm 
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the only way direct is really gonna work is if you're honest and genuine about it

when your lying to yourself on the inside and not really "genuine" about what your saying, your gonna mess up, and your gonna cringe on the inside

genuineness builds real confidence. it makes you feel strong and alive on the inside. it gives you power - it boosts self esteem and confidence


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