So I've been talking with this girl for a while, and we hit it off really well. I try to balance the "awww" moments and the flirtacious moments (you know how women are, show that youre the sweetest guy in the world AND a great flirter and you get pegged as prince charming), and i do a pretty good job. Shes been out of town for a while but none the less we talk, i actually have her IM so its easy that way. But I can't help but feel I'm at a bypass. She shows IOIs but she's not exactly begging to see me, and we talk regularly. she has a habit of telling me stories of other guys hitting on her, always in a negative light to laugh at them and what not. I'm under the impression this is quite the IOI, I hope I'm not wrong. In fact i think this dynamic started after i told off some douche that was giving her a hard time and we laughed about it after.


So heres the deal: She was telling me about how boring it is where shes at, (visiting grandma) so i said we should celebrate when she comes back by going out for a fun night. She did the typical girl thing where she neither confirmed or denied her want to go on a date so i get the impression i need that extra inch to get a yes. She is by far the hardest girl ive had to get inside the head of, part of why im so interested to begin with, but having abundant experience with starters and escalation and little experience with finishes i dont know where to go from here.

So I'm looking for pointers on how to use what i've already got (the possibility of a Day 1 to celebrate her return) and get her to agree to a set date and time, i think THE hardest thing i've had to deal with in all my pua experience. Tell me your thoughts.

Sounds like you're on the verge of being put in the dreaded friend zone mate.

The only way forward with this one is to:

1 - Stop being the guy who she runs to so she can moan about other guys hitting on her etc, just change the subject next time she starts telling you about stuff like this - it could even be a shit-test to see if you get jealous when she talks to you about other men. Avoid the subject.

2 - Kino escalate. You MUST do this to avoid the friend zone.

3 - Don't ASK her out on a date when she gets back, instead TELL her that she has to be ready at X-time, because you are taking her to Y-place. Be the man and take the lead. Oh, and tell her to look pretty for your date together, she'll love that!

-Soul

Looks like you have created affection instead of attraction, you need to "discover" a trait to her that now makes you interested in her as a sexual being that you never realised she possessed, then imply that had you known of this attribute, then you being a confident man would have approached the relationship entirely different. Then go kino (calibrated) as soon as you can, start leading and as soul mafia say's tell her to be ready at X time oh, and also tell her to wear her highest heels to the date: girls pick which shoes they are going to be wearing first and then dress accordingly (which is totally ridiculous but that's why we love them so much!) so you will save her a lot of fashion decisions before she does arrive and appear as a confident man who takes care of problems.

thanks guys you put to words what i was thinking. i'm not exactly at the friend zone lol its just not that workable of a standpoint unless i was already sleeping with her on a regular basis and we were in an established LTR. haha and thats some great advice soul... but what if its a day shes got some plans already? not that im worried but wouldn't rescheduling be the worst thing in this situation? Dont want to come off as desperate haha. Oh and i'll take the heels thing into mind, she's definitely the heel wearing type, and that will definitely peak her interest.

I get what you're saying about "discovering a trait", i've actually done that with her a few times before. You're not saying i should be flat out, right? Like hinting at seeing her in a new light, possibly sexual. I often use metaphors and such, like putting emphasis on certain words with that oh so dirty tone haha where it brings new meaning to ordinary conversation. Or did you mean a physical trait rather than her sexual side?

p.s. attraction vs. affection... I'll make a mental note of that and take it into consideration form now on. very good point. lol and by the way if i had blown her shit test with the whole other guys hitting on her she probably wouldve stopped talking to me. I basically just responded with "well theres a lot of guys that want you but i'm the only one that YOU want" only implied in what i was saying.

If she has other plans on the day that you arrange the 'date' then just re-arrange it for another day. That's not needy at all!

When the day comes, kino escalate hard and fast, have a fantastic day out together and make sure you fuck her good and proper. Once you have had sex, there will now be an emotional connection between you and take it from there.

Good luck pal!

-Soul

IMO, when a girl is interested, she'll do every thing she can to go on your date.

I mean, seduction process and reactions are slightly different in different countries or culture. In france for example, the girl will either say yes, or find a lame excuse to say no. But I've never experienced girls being like neither confirming or denying.

I've been gaming girls in Anglo-Saxon countries, and I've then experienced what you just said. They are neither confirming or denying, sometimes...
Do you guys get that a lot as well? What does it really mean about your game?

I'm looking for the answer too haha, it may be very important. I mean as far as i can tell, shes got something holding her back but she plays it off like shes teasing me. to be honest i tried digging beneath it and i was surprised because she said she thought she was pregnant and she didnt want to go out with me because she thought i would see her different. then after she found out she wasnt pregnant she started talking to me again but she still has the same mentality. Why are all the best girls the most complicated? And what else could possibly be holding her back?