I think your right, it's something that I have to change, or meet in the middle with myself, before women would take me for a fool like guy, maybe now I think I'm on top to much.

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: Blog entries@ http://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com/

all you need to know is you showed enough insecurity in that one argument (with all the different thigns you said) that she knows she doesn't need to see you again.

When things go wierd, oftne it's best just to bail and cut your losses, let it blow over, let her wonder what you're thinking, and come back later - potentially reframing it as if nothing ever happened. Let her wonder what's going on.

When you lose your cool - that's something women don't want to see. When you say certain statements, such as "you wont' get a better chance" that's also something they dont' want to see. Cross off enough of these check boxes, and they don't need to see you anymore.

They dont' need to logically justify these thigns (and they can't) - they are all emotional reactions, that emotion is developed over thousands of years of evolution to tell her which guy is stable. It's not contestable verbally. The only thing that can change it is her seeing you behave differently than that.

Thanks for everyone's input, important you guys read this, as yesterday the tables turned, and kind of explains everything really, and shows that I was being to PUA minded as Hobbit stated.

It's important to remember me and my the girl in this post, haven't spoken properly since last week, had no idea about what she's been doing, even deleted her number etc.

Last night was my friends gf's fancy dress party, I went with 2 friends, their gf's and mine was meant to come, but we split, so obviously never happened. Me and one of my friends decided to move on to central London, we did this went to a few places, had something to eat after out clubbing night, spoke for about an hour with my cousin's friend who is a doorman at a club, whom I haven't seem for some time, this was all time consuming, this is where it gets important.

I start to make my way home, waiting for a bus, chatting to people, guess who I see in the corner of my eye, my EX, the one who things went funny with, had no idea she was there, she never knew I'd be up there, she just assumed I was going to the fancy dress party too.

We spoke, left my friend with hers, took the same bus home, I asked face to face, "what's up?" Casually, said" you kool?". She said"I'm really sorry",I just said for what, she said "about us, it wasn't what I wanted", I said shit happens.

She said now she seen me she needs to tell me the truth. She thought she was pregnant, 10 days late on her period (now had a test and she isn't) and she said "she loves me", said if she told me, I would probably run away from her, so the easiest option for her was to call it a day.

I can actually believe this, because she's that kind of caring girl, and I do care about her, which is evident throughout this post.

So what do you guys think? Genuine, go back with the flow?

I'm seeing her today.

I'm the type of guy to stick with someone through thick and thin if I care about them, female or a male friend. I wont let PUA minded things pull me away from that.

Now do you guys believe in fate? I always have done, everything happens for a reason, and the way all this happened, me not knowing where she is/was and her the same with me, plus all the time consuming things I did, just makes me think.

Thanks for reading.

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hart to tell man, woman are a crazy breed. So she loves you and was worried that if she told you she was pregnant you would leave so she broke up with you instead?? The result was the same so im not sure that really makes sense

Do you really want to be with somebody who doesn't trust you enough to be honest with you about such an important issue. If she cant talk to you or be honest, what is going to happen when something actually does happens, will she just quit and run off again when things get tough?

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~Carmo~

most relationships end within 3 months. Its the time for all those hormones wear down and for you to really see what each other look like. Don't sweat it, its no you. Its both of you that weren't a match.

edit: just read your post. Maybe she changed her mind. Make sure she has time to think always

Okay, here's what I think.

She wasn't 10 days late on her period- she was actually 10 days in, having an irritable day, which ended with her dumping you. She now regrets it, and is going into the "Oh but wait... I can explain!" routine. I believe you when you say she's a caring girl, but believe me when I say no girl is that caring; if she thought she was pregnant, she would not have dumped you. She would have made you dinner.

Women manipulate men in many ways; they don't do it on purpose or with bad intentions... it's hard to explain. I've seen it time and time again, and this routine is the oldest one in the book: "I dumped him, I feel bad, now what can I say to make myself come out looking better? To make it seem like I did it for his own good?" This is the harsh reality. Your girl is not a bad person; I've heard of worse tactics than this.

I'm not saying it's defiantly a lie... I'm just saying don't bank on it.

Now do I think you should get back together with her? Sure- go for it. But not before you look her in the eyes and tell her "Listen. The way you ended it- I deserve more than that. If this is going to work, you need to show me more respect". Don't be fooled by her excuses; it was an act of disrespect on her part and she knows it... you need to let her know that you know it too, and you won't stand for it.

Now, does it surprise you that I don't ?



-Roz

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NOTE: I'm taking a break from the site, and hence will not be responding to any messages!

Haha thanks guys, all comments appreciated.

Roz I am not surprised in you not believing in fate ha.

We've spoke and sorted things, on sunday, I told her, what she did, was disrespectful, and I wont stand for shit basically. I'm stubborn, of course I care about her, and in ways I don't believe what she said and in ways I do, so now, I've decided after what happened, I'm going to take a bit more of a back seat, not think so serious for a while again and just enjoy myself, and see what happens.

We seem to have had great communication again in the last few days, brief and good talk.

I'm going to go with the flow, and whatever will be, will be.

I'll keep this thread updated. Incase people are interested.

Thanks a lot guys.

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: Blog entries@ http://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com/

Er... care to elaborate, and contribute something useful?

Actually this is my own experience from interacting and discussing with a wide variety of women. Believe me dude, you are picking on the wrong person to accuse of spouting "PUA material. Every other post I make, I explicitly state how against the vast majority of it I am.

Have you actually got a problem with me telling a man he has to BEHAVE differently? Can you honestly hand-wave away that concept as "PUA material"?

Do you even know what I'm talking about? Haven't you ever had a girl turn cold and then blame it on some weird reason that didn't matter before but somehow matters now?

Update since everything was sorted. I've walked away from it, she's been ignorant last few days, ignoring me, called her out on it, turns out she has an STD, accusing me, going mad.

She never consulted me, or spoke about it, just straight into pure abuse, "Your this, your that, leave me alone" Tried to speak because an STD is a serious issue. Everythings done now.

Before I got with her I was clean, I'm going to get checked tomorrow or the next day, I hope if anything, it's nothing serious and can be cured. I don't have any symptoms really. It could be her trying to put her shit on me and make me feel bad.

She's threatened me by saying she will go for me with a bat, smas my car up etc. She don't scare me, wants to smash something up, good luck to her, but I've walked away now just as she has. This is a terrible sign.

She's pissed me off more than upset me, I care, but for her to go about things like that is a total lack of respect. I'm sure most would agree.

Thanks for reading.

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Damn dude! If my chick gave me an STD... Oh hell no... we'd have big problems. Hopefully its something curable. Good luck man.

Thanks man! You know what, I just heard she hasn't even been checked out. Not until monday, so she's going by pure assumption because she has some pain. Shows great immaturity there.

Glad she's gone now from my life. Onwards and upwards from here on in!

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Been there, done it, oh and still doing it!

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Good, now stay away from it. We're talking more than lack of respect here, and I hope you know your worth; don't even bother with girls like these. I get she's in a very difficult circumstance what with finding out about the STD and all, but there's a way to go about things.

Anyway, I really hope everything turns out right for you and you can just take care of this situation as fast as possible, and move on.

Good luck!


-Roz

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NOTE: I'm taking a break from the site, and hence will not be responding to any messages!

I haven't called her immature directly, it's more in my thoughts, because she should have spoken to me, like a decent human/adult would. Not assume she has something before getting checked, and then accusing me, what she has done is totaly wrong, and disrespectful on many fronts, or maybe I'm just deluded. I was told she's getting checked on monday, it could be cystitis, urine infection, something pure and simple, then who looks a fool? Not me. I haven't said one bad word to her and don't intend on doing so, even all the abuse she has given me for nothing, I don't need to drop that low, this way I have no regrets.

I still believe underneath all this shit, she's a good girl and she's lucky she has a good family, but I don't want it anymore and definitely don't deserve it, because I don't want her crap side with it, because it's not normal, and really isn't acceptable behaviour.

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I intend to man, I'm not bad, person, my morals are good too, I'm confident, I can find a girl if I want one, I just don't look, but as you said, this is the kind of girl I do not want. I'm 21, almost 22, I've hopefully got some good time ahead, I've learnt so much in the last 3 years or so with different girls, I use every experience as a learning curve.

I agree, finding out you may have an STD is bad, but it wasn't from me, I was clean before I got with her, so that's why I'm getting checked, appointment on monday. I found out she's getting checked on monday, so she's going by pure assumption because of some pain and being late on her period, pure stupidity in my opinion.

As stated by yourself Roz, there is always a right way to go about things, this could have been resolved if she used her brain, and it wouldn't have come to this. 3 months into a relationship, and all this bullshit, lucky I'm out now and not a year down the line.

Thanks

Chel

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