Hey guys im new to the forums ive read around alittle bit and thought id sign up because honestly i cant live this lifestyle anymore... I want to be able to pick up girls. Im 18 and i havent had a girl for a long time. When i try to talk to girls they dont seem interested they look like their bord i dont have much to say to them and doesnt seem like i can really get their attention when i walk into a room. I am told on a regular bases that im really good lookin and alot of girls think im good looking but even those girls dont seem interested in me i even managed to not be able to get a girl that was really crazy about me :-\. Basically my problem is the fact that i dont know how to talk to the girls i dont know what to say i dont know how to act. I read in the shyness section on this site and i couldnt really get much out of it besides people saying just grab ur nuts and go talk to the girl i dont really see how thats gonna work for me :-\. Any opinions or suggestions would be very helpful i would really love to be able to get some girls talk to them and be the one that is known to get all the girls...

thank you

Got a few buddy friends who are into clubbing? start tagging along clubbing.. even if you dont meet girls in the club, you will start to build on a "party guy" image...

Ive noticed that since i started clubbing, alot of females outside of the ones ive meet at clubs actually find it interesting, they think that you know how to have a good time and are not borring..

You just got to make yourself interesting.. Take up some cool hobbies.. something you can talk about to girls and they will be like wow thats interesting..

Your only 18... chill out man you should be looking at school, jobs and cars!!! hahah

_________________
Either her, or your hand.. its all up to you

Well if the problem is after the initial approach then just remember these general guidelines for "fluff talking".

Use open ended questions, this opens the convo more, can give you information on facts and/or opinions that may be usefull, and lets you know if she's a talker or a listener.

If she's a talker keep the convo about her, and let her spill the beans about herself listen and try to retain important facts.

If she's a listener tell her stories about your personal experiences, maybe tease her about being shy... but then IOI at her by telling her it's ok shy girls are cute... or if you wanna pull some bigger guns... it's kool quiet girls are always the best in bed.

Remember be funny, tease her, mirror her positive body language, establish kino (touching) and ASSUME THE SALE on your close!

that brings me to another problem.. none of my firends like to party so i dont really get to many chances to meet girls i guess the only place i can really is at school and i dont really have much time between classes to pick up on girls...

I have to say personally I preffer day game over parties/clubs.

You can go for girls at school... or go to a mall/ local hangout. Your 18 are you in HS or college?

First off, you need to study the material and know the logistics to why you are failing with women. The guys above haven't suggested that and they are way off basis. Even if you go out into the field and fuck up, you will not know why. Reading the material will give you a insight on the social aspect of what goes on in the attraction/seduction stages. It'll teach you to turn those attraction switches on in a woman and to use the correct body language.

Body language alone can destroy your game. In fact, it speaks more than your actual words. Read up, learn, then go out in the field and practice.


Recommended reading: Magic Bullets, "Definitive guide to Body Language"

Are you a good listener? When they talk are you listening, or struggling to think of what to say next? A conversation has to flow.

Body language is important. How you dress and groom yourself are important. Your confidence level is very important.

The advice about get a hobby is good. There has to be something in your life that you are passionate about, so you can tell her about it and get excited and get her interested. You need to be an interesting person to have an interesting conversation.

Good luck. You're still very young. Don't worry, college is easier than high school when it comes to meeting women.

To answer all the questions you guys asked. I am in college its my first year. There is so much to read on this site i mean i just cant seem to figure out where i can start reading lol i tryed reading everything but wow i got all confused. I am a good listener acutally im much better at listening then talkin pretty much girls come to me only to tell me there problems so i can listen not really for me to talk to them. Can you guys suggest some things i can search on this site to read?

You are in college, don't tell me there isn't time to meet women. You don't have to show up right when your first class starts, and you don't have to leave when the last one ends.

Don't be a girls' bitch buddy. You know, the guy she bitches all her problems to. If she starts doing this, act uninterested and try to change subject. Conversation should become easy when you are comfortable with the person. I'm betting you put any girl who talks to you on a pedestal, which is bad. This makes you nervous, and less likely to keep the conversation going. Just think of them as another person, someone who you just met.

And most important - be yourself. Don't act like someone you're not.

_________________
The hottest ginger you'll ever meet.

I don't have an ego, I just love how awesome I am.

^ so basically dont be there for them? lol pretend i dont care about their problems?

I agree you do not want to just stand there like a lump of clay and listen to her problems. Rather than act uninterested, I would act very interested and say something like, "oh, I know how you feel, one time this girl I was seeing did blah blah blah and it made me feel blah blah blah. So I dumped her and moved on.
So, did you see that new movie? It was awsome"

or whatever. Shut down the topic at hand and start a new one that isn't all about her problems. Move on to something light, then get into positive discussion where she's telling you something positive about herself that you can then admire and relate to.

This is a crucial distinction.

A lot of good ideas here on not being a girl's whine box. Just realize
that when that happens, you're probably the one putting yourself in
that situation, not her.

It's about preventing the problem before it happens in the first place.

As far as overcoming shyness/approach anxiety, I'm in the same
boat. Here's an idea though:

Start with something that takes little or no work on your part, or
something that is super easy to you.

example: I have this Alf t-shirt. Every time I wear it out, everyone
looks and at least one person stops me to comment on the shirt...
most times it's a girl. BAM!, the work is done for me. All I had to do
was put on the stupid shirt. All I have to do now is take advantage of
the situation. [BTW, for some reason women LOVE Alf... even though
he eats cats]

Establishing a lifestyle is also very key to creating the life you want.
Really dive into what YOU enjoy and are good at... and women will
take notice.

Learn to play the guitar. OMG, that is a huge attraction trigger.

Oh. . . and since you're in college, learn how to throw a good party.

Be the host. Pass out flyers and let the girls come to you.

Had a P.J. and P.J. party back in college. Girls were showing up at my place in their underwear!

Arkitekt i actually do play the guitar lol and i must say it is one of the things that girls love. And thanks for all the advice theres alot of good helpful info in here i always actually thought that listening to the girl actually was a good thing but i guess not so im stop that lol.. also lets say im walkin down the hall at school and theres a girl passing by whos pretty attractive what would you do in that time? would u try to make eye contact? or what i mean i cant just turn around and follow her thats just werid... any ideas?

I look at almost everyone I pass in the halls, it gets you comfortable with eye contact. If a girl looks at you, then quickly looks away and looks back, that is a good sign. If she smiles, even better. I wouldn't, however, turn around and follow her to try to start a conversation. You can say something like, "Hey, hows it going." while slowing down. If she stops and responds go from there.

Today I had a good chance at this, but failed to capitalize. I was walking down the halls chatting it up with a friend, when I make eye contact with this really cute brunette. She looks at me, looks away quickly, and then looks back with a smile. I just smile back and continue walking, I really should have done the approach above. But, you live, learn, and do work next time.

_________________
The hottest ginger you'll ever meet.

I don't have an ego, I just love how awesome I am.