Or, someone slap the shit out of me, I can't believe this is bothering me even though I have another date tonight.

Last week I went on a coffee date with a girl who who during the date and afterwards sent me nothing but IOIs. Two days ago she sent me a text message telling me "fyi, I have Tue and Wed off". I had asked her before in a previous conversation if she would like to go to a dinner show with me on either Tue, Wed, or Thur, and she said she would tell me when she found out. I got off work, drove home, called her, and left her a message. It was short and to the point. I said in so many words that I was thinking we'd go Tuesday, they have a cool website with information about the show she should check out, call me back when you get the message.

Well Tuesday is tomorrow and she hasn't called back yet. These things do call for reservations. Perhaps the ball's already in my court and I'm just looking for confirmation on the fact? In any case, I need to know what of the four dishes she wants to eat because they require for you to call that in too.

So is this normal, or what?

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Life is no less funny when someone dies than it is less serious when someone laughs. -- George Bernard Shaw

too many factors to consider, just keep your mind busy with other shit, i remember my most recent fuck buddy, it took 2 months between the first meet and when i finally closed the deal, patience is truly a virtue in these cases, if you let it get to ya you're going end up calling her too often and seem needy and let her know that shes got the upper hand and screw you're self over, just scratch her for now, trust me they always come around...well from my experience anyways

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a good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow

Would sending her a text message saying:

"Are you metting with me Tuesday? I need to know before making reservations."

be acceptable or overkill?

Or perhaps...

"Sleuths Mystery Dinnershow is wanting to know what we're ordering to eat. Would you like the prime rib or lasagna?"

The girl I'm seeing tonight didn't confirm either over email, so I just caught her on the phone and made sure she was coming out then and there. I'm thinking maybe these girls think that we've made somesort of unspoken agreement that we're going out and meeting, but for me it's not the same thing at all. Plan's aren't made until both parties say "Yes, that sounds good. I shall be there."

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Life is no less funny when someone dies than it is less serious when someone laughs. -- George Bernard Shaw

Man your game smacks of typical AFC right now. First off, drop the dinner/show plans. Every AFC in the world does this and pays for everything too. So don't do that. What you're going to do is do something casual with her like go shopping or just "hang" for the day. Secondly, why did you give all the power away by making everything dependant on HER decision to call YOU. It should be the other way around. Because now she knows you're waiting by the phone JUST FOR HER. To put it bluntly, No this is not normal. You're acting like a total pussy trying to please her anyway you can. So the ball is definately not in your court. Do yourself a favour and read the above quote again and look how much interest your showing this girl because you're trying to make this "perfect" AFC-date.
This is horrible advice. Patience is the hallmark of the AFC where you hang around her and give her all this emotional fullfillment while you go home to pull your pud for months until finally she "gives in" and SHE LETS YOU f-close her or you blindly stumble into her pants one night.

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Holden/28/Canada
Style of Game: Pragmatic Pimp Approach

Holden is right. The fact that you are making these extravagent dinner plans is very AFC and you should just drop is and if you don't hear from her, then call her in a couple days and suggest something like hanging out at the mall or a park or something chill. Spending money to hang out isn't necissary. I'm still working on my phone game, but I say you only leave one message and then if you don't hear from her for a while, try calling again, but don't leave another message. Same thing with texts.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Whoah, one second.

I'll admit I still have my AFC tendacies, but I'm hardly paying through the nose for this date. I'm a concierge. Through my work, the evening is going to cost me $30, and it's something I've been planning on seeing with or without a date since it's my job to recommend these things to people. Last month I went to Discovery Cove for Free, took a 300 foot free fall on the Sky Coaster at the Fun Spot for free, and payed $13 for myself to get into Medieval Times, and then extended the same deal to about 9 of my friends so they could join me. This IS casual to me My wallet is hardly going to go into cardiac arrest over here, so keep that in mind.

And yeah, I should have mentioned that before. My apologies.

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Life is no less funny when someone dies than it is less serious when someone laughs. -- George Bernard Shaw

In that case, I'd say that you plan for going alone and if she calls and its too late, then let her know that she missed the boat, but that you're going to the mall or something this week and that she can join you. Make sure you don't offer to take her to another nice event, because she flaked and now she needs to be punished. You can't verbally say to her, "hey, that's not cool, you're in the dog house now," so instead you do the same thing by taking her to something less interesting, but you still make it fun with good conversation and interesting stories and such. If you just tell her that there is another cool event and she can come to that one, then you are saying that its ok for her to flake on you and you DLV yourself. If she gets in touch with you in time, you can tell her that she just got in under the wire and that you were about to make plans without her, so that she understands that you don't wait for other people, you lead the way.

Going to things like this are great especially since you get them for really cheap or free, but make sure to show that you are dynamic by doing ordinary things regularly too.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

You're missing the point. It's not an issue of money. Its the image and impression thats given by doing these things. PUA Hitori wrote an article called "Women Explained" that sums up my point.

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Holden/28/Canada
Style of Game: Pragmatic Pimp Approach

"A chick's reaction to a man she does not already find desirable supplicating for approval is about the same as YOUR reaction when you stop at a red light and some hobo goes to squeejee your windshield for dollars. Maybe you'll give him your spare change, sure - but what if he was asking for sex? Would you bang him? "



Funny as shiit but true.

I typed a few things, and then deleted them...you guys are right. The supplication thing is a big pill to swallow but the fear of a girl turning me down because I won't pay her share of entertainment is one that needs to go out the window.

In any case, I made my last phone call to her and she didn't pick up or call me back. I'm not counting on her getting back into touch with me.

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Life is no less funny when someone dies than it is less serious when someone laughs. -- George Bernard Shaw

Its hard when you start and you are into a chick, but if she's screwing around, then you just have to say, "fuck it, I'll find another one." You don't burn your bridges of course, but you can leave a message that may get her to call you, or might just result in hooking up again later. Something like, "Hey, just thought I'd try calling you, but I guess you're pretty busy. Give me a call, or maybe I'll see you around some time."

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Why are you taking her to dinner/show? Take her somewhere fun and that isn't going to cost a lot. Take her bowling and get some ice cream. Your plan is too much of a "date". Initiate kino, run some tests "strawberry fields, cube, palm reading". You should be in the comfort stage. Don't ask what day......just fucking schedule it and tell her a time.