This is a copy of my answer to a question. I thought it was so good, I put it as a topic.

I´ve been thinking about this topic for a long time, and found out that it all comes down to a couple of things.

I´m going to break it down for you right away, you can ask yourself if this makes sense.

1. First, you gotta believe in yourself.
This means, you believe in your core. You are fully aware of your own capability.
Hard to describe.
The gut feeling that you have about you, that you are going to handle whatever happens. I think that is the core of self confidence.

2. Being aware of your own self worth
If you were to stop and ask yourself a question, what do we people find valuable in life? Money, jewlery, precious moments.
But these are all external things or events.
I think the highest level you can achieve is to realize that you are the most valuable person, thing, moment in life. Your heart, body and soul, your mind is the most valuable in your life.
Self- value.

Most people have external self value, wich means that they determine the value of a person by the things he has valueable in his life. Maybe an expensive watch, a car, a fancy suit, expensive vacation etc.

What you need to do is change that to internal self value. Where you will determine the value of a person by his character traits.

Good way to achieve this, is to go to work on your character and develop it. Than you will find out how hard it is to have character and you will change your focus from external to internal.

I think your problem with women is that you dont believe in yourself and you are not aware of your own value as a HUMAN BEING.

3. Self-deserving
Whenever you feel unvaluable you dont feel like you deserve something. Like when you see a hot woman, you feel fear, but underneath it all is your feeling that you dont deserve her anyway. She probably wants rich guy with good looks.
Im not that guy (Identifying your own self worth by external things, events)

So say a lot to yourself things like: "I´m no different than that guy, I deserve that too"

4 . RESPECT YOURSELF

What is respect? Check online. Study it. What would you do, if you had total respect for yourself?

QUESTONS TO ASK YOURSELF
- How do you behave toward someone that you respect a lot?
- Could you behave toward yourself like that?
- Why do you respect that guy?
- Do you posess the same qualities?
- Could you develop them so they shine?
- What could you do to develop that qualities in yourself?
- How would you feel if you already had that qualities?

Treat yourself with respect. Respect your time, dont waste it.
Respect your proprety, dont ruin it.
Respect your family, your relationships. They are YOURS.

I hope that helps.

Take care

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Good post. I want to point out too that one reason some people can have serious difficulty with this (the mindset of being deserving or worthy of respect) is when they don't have much going on for them. I'm referring only to a certain group of people, this is not applicable to everyone. Any given "natural" instructor, if he's any good at all, will dedicate a significant amount of time emphasizing the importance of inner game, or being sure that you do something in your life other than and unrelated to interacting with women.

As a man especially, setting and completing tasks/goals that you are proud of correlates directly to how worthy of respect you can allow yourself to feel. The reasoning is primarily scientific, because whether you realize it or not when you finish a task you started it causes your body to release endorphins which naturally fight off depression and anxiety. Integral to your entire mindset because someone suffering from this type of depression will find it next to impossible to feel any sort of value toward themself, which in turn will be communicated to others who will readily concur. So my point is - if you are someone who finds the original post's advice difficult to implement in your life, make sure you are not neglecting your growth as an individual by leading an unfulfilling life.

Good luck.

_________________
"Jerry Lee Louis is the true king of rock n' roll."

This reminds me of maslow's pyramid. ^_^

You know now that you mention it, it's practically identical... so perhaps in essence Maslow was stating long before anyone that *NOT* being a pua makes you abnormal.

_________________
"Jerry Lee Louis is the true king of rock n' roll."

Good post, OP.

If you don't believe in yourself, no one else will.

Absolutely brilliant! Would love to see more work like this.

Thank you,
Ang