1. Get a tan.. fake or otherwise.
2. Get contact lenses if you wear glasses.
3. Join a sports club, football (or soccer if you're a Yank), Rugby, Cricket etc..
4. Get on a team of that said sport - practice regularly.
5. Ensure you always have a stylish, up to date hair cut.
6. Go to the gym, tone yourself up - build up your shoulders, pecktoids and arms..
7. If you wear a uniform to school - accessorise, no rings, a few cool looking bracelets, and a nice watch - no need to be expensive.
8. Get some proper shoes, your ragged beat up sneakers don't cut it. do the same for jeans, underwear, and your tshirts... get polo shirts instead. or t-shirt / proper shirt combo
9. Stand up straight, and practise your speech. Don't mumble, try not to stutter, speak clearly.
10. BE LOUD... When you see a girl you like, watching you play football.. run towards her.. make like caveman - pick her up.. make her join game. She run.. but she'll remeber that muscular physique that she was draped over..
11. As much as you love heavy metal, don't ever wear heavy metal t-shirts.. ever. Period. Learn to like lame newish music, but always appreciate the classics.
12. Be a bit of a C*nt.. learn to fire off quick comebacks.. "Their mother" is a good place to start.
13. Don't over do it with the comebacks.. you might make yourself out to be toooo much of a C*nt.. therefore loosing core friends.
14. DON'T EVER CHEW YOUR FFFFKKIINNGGG FINGER NAILS.
15. Learn to fight - learn to take a hit.. and most importantly.. learn to control people with the use of Leadership and good logic - refraine from saying stupid things. THINK BEFORE YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH.
15.5 - Talking about X-box / World of Warcraft / PS3 / your wanking machine at school is unnattractive - remember - EVERYONE is listening to what you're saying to your mates. And don't trust your mates with information..
16. Use a little bit of PUA techniques to game the girls lightly - getting them in the mental state to give you their Virginity Card at that drunken party coming up soon.
17. Learn to drink - NO ALPHA MALE IN HIGHSCOOL PASSES OUT AFTER ONE BEER.
17.5- LEARN TO DRINK RESPONSIBLY.. NO ONE WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH A ALCOHOLIC C*NT.
18. With a mix of sport, cuntishness, and PUA - throw in some intelligence in the mix, and combine all three with confidence.
19. Hate to say it - but a majority of chicks in highscool don't really f^ck until they are in their final few years. If you're still in early years - string them along.. AMOGs in school all have girlfriends - remember - regular sex from first (freshman - for you Yank scum *jooookkkiinngg I love Amerikahstan*) year till whenever is better than no sex till you middle years..
20 = if this game looks way too much to handle - don't bloody play!!
oh yea.. and no matter how much you like cooking.. DO NOT EVER TAKE / SHOW INTEREST IN HOME -ECONOMICS..
Learn to cook from Jaime Oliver.. and besides - cooking is just time management..
or maths.. for example.. Egg+Boiling Water x 4minutes = perfect runny sh!t eggs, good with whole-wheat toast - chop up some spinach and mild chillies, and you got a super-awsome-kick ass fire breakfast - high in protein - for step 6.
oooh yea.. and if you're the runt of the family - try and look as much like that sparkly phaggot Edward from Twilight - and you'll have girls putting over you.. no matter how thick, weak, pale, nerdy you are.. just watch out for the AMOG descirbed above - he'll kick the sh!t out of you
and IF ALL THAT fails.. find the guy who gives you shit everyday.. the dude build like an elephant on Crystal-Meth..
Kick, scratch, headbutt, punch, his face until he either kicks the shit out of you - or until (and if you make it look crazzzyy enough) you beat him down to china town.
In the words of Ali G- ALL YOU NEED IS RESPECT...
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YEAAA BOIIII!
CHAT