Getting a girls number but no response



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PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 6:34 am 
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I'm new here. Tired of talking to girl after girl and getting no where... Sometimes I'll get her number and when I call/text (depending on what she prefers) I'll get nothing back.

I'd love to know what this means? and how to deal with it

also I probably talk to loads of girls a week and often then not I hear her say "I have a boyfriend" theses aren't girls I know I'll just see one approach with an opener, start a convo and I'll hear that.

How do I deal with this?

sorry for the long body of text and thanks in advance


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 4:25 pm 
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"I have a boyfriend" often means you a telegraphing too much interest too soon. If you are going indirect then remember to have your body language face away, open over the shoulder and only turn your body language towards her as the conversation progresses.

As for flaking, make sure you have established some kind of connection with her and have a legitimate reason to see each other. It can be as simple as showing her your favourite café or her joining you and your friends at a club night your friend DJs at. You don't have to actually do that specific thing, but future projecting makes her invest more in your interaction and she is more likely to remember you. Also try and set up day 2s on weekday evenings because it's less pressure than a weekend invite which can feel more like a "date" and also she might be worried she'll have to spend all of saturday night with you rather than her friends, and you might actually suck balls.

Finally, before sending out an invite, send a random and/or funny message that doesn't need a response a few days after meeting her. My outbox is full of messages that just say "omg I just met your twin!" It's a great message because it's random and makes her imagine tons of possible situations, makes her a little bit jealous, and shows that you're out meeting other women. THEN when she gets back to you, throw out the invite.

The invite itself should be to something a bit more interesting then dinner or film. Be aware of whats going on in your local area and in your town/city in general. You'll get points for knowing the new hip tapas place that just opened up, the underground indie place with free shows on weekdays, or the quaint little shop that does wine and cheese tasting every wednesday. Bounce to a few different locations, the last one of which should be walking distance to your house. Hopefully I need not spell out what you do then ;-)

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 29, 2010 2:41 pm 
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thanks I like that. Probably not a good place to ask this questioin (being wrong part of forum) but could you please help with some good openers into mid game routine?

I talk to a lot of girls in a week and I find it strange non have no interest in me. I'm clean cut (get a hair cut every 2weeks), I don't smell (thanks Axe) I'm not bad to look at (cept when the moon is full)

My usual opener in a bar is walking up to a set, taking there tissue or napkin and turning it into money. Its great but afterwards I just start iceskating with nothing interesting at all to say.

when not in a bar I just do the usual introducing myself into small talk or asking them if they believe in ESP (The book "The Game") which is great if I guess there numbers which are usual 3 and 7.

sorry for the long post had to give you a feel where I am. Any info would be great you seem to know your stuff. Ima use that "OMG I just met your twin" in text whenever I get another number.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 29, 2010 4:30 pm 
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Never open with a magic trick again.

It sets the wrong frame. You are overtly trying to impress them, it makes you look weak and needy. You shouldn't have to do anything overtly special to start a conversation. You need to set the vibe that you are someone that everyone like to be around. You can do this 2 ways

1 actually becoming that person in a way that doesn't sacrifice your unique personality. Think you with an exclamation mark at the end,or a common phrase around here "your best self". (this should be your end goal it is most effective, and enlightening)

2 Imitating it or following other people's instructions VERBATIM. Kind of like how most people follow the Mystery Method (MM) or things they read in "The Game" without understanding exactly how and why it works. More often than not MM will not work because the concepts are not understood and reinforce natural negative behaviors, like feeling the need to validate yourself to others. This school of thought can work and will cause short term gain but more often than not make you worse. People who are effective with this imitation school of thought act the part so much they become the part. Thus landing in the first option but taking far more time and effort to get there.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 29, 2010 5:02 pm 
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I was discussing that with some friends today. The women of the group all said they dont like to give away their number to strangers...

So I also think that finding a connection/reason to give her your number is better. Then tell her to text you to confirm a detail (eg. time of meet up?)

What do you guys think about SPAM you facebook name? maybe it is easier for the girl to add you than texting you back?


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 30, 2010 1:31 am 
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Never open with a magic trick again.

It sets the wrong frame. You are overtly trying to impress them, it makes you look weak and needy. You shouldn't have to do anything overtly special to start a conversation. You need to set the vibe that you are someone that everyone like to be around. You can do this 2 ways

1 actually becoming that person in a way that doesn't sacrifice your unique personality. Think you with an exclamation mark at the end,or a common phrase around here "your best self". (this should be your end goal it is most effective, and enlightening)

2 Imitating it or following other people's instructions VERBATIM. Kind of like how most people follow the Mystery Method (MM) or things they read in "The Game" without understanding exactly how and why it works. More often than not MM will not work because the concepts are not understood and reinforce natural negative behaviors, like feeling the need to validate yourself to others. This school of thought can work and will cause short term gain but more often than not make you worse. People who are effective with this imitation school of thought act the part so much they become the part. Thus landing in the first option but taking far more time and effort to get there.
Always looked at opening with magic that way but couldn't get away from it as it gets such a nice sometimes big reaction but I always knew it wasn't the right way to open a girl or set.

My only other opener is "Hi I'm Jeremy and I noticed you as I was walking and had to approach you. Could you do a favor for me? (she says "hm?", "uh?" something along those lines) could you smile? (usually smiles haven't seen one that doesn't at this point) aww I knew you had a beautiful smile!"

then I go into a bit about myself into asking for her number which usually gets the "I have boyfriend" spill or she'll actually give it to me (which rarely happens)

again I know this is the wrong place for this but what is a solid opener that'll work for just about any situation? and what's a good tranistion from that opener into a decent convo leading into asking for her number?

I usually end with "I enjoyed talking to you and I'd like to keep in contact what's the best way for me to contact you?"


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 30, 2010 9:22 am 
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My only other opener is "Hi I'm Jeremy and I noticed you as I was walking and had to approach you. Could you do a favor for me? (she says "hm?", "uh?" something along those lines) could you smile? (usually smiles haven't seen one that doesn't at this point) aww I knew you had a beautiful smile!"

then I go into a bit about myself into asking for her number which usually gets the "I have boyfriend" spill or she'll actually give it to me (which rarely happens)
I dont know what other people on the forum think but in my opinion you qualify her to much...

Also, "I have a boyfriend" is a bitchshield, so you might ask to early in the convo or display too much interest.
As i wrote in another post of this subforum, maybe they just dont like to give away their number to strangers. Do you have better success when asking for emails/facebook names?


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 30, 2010 10:39 am 
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Quote:
Never open with a magic trick again.

It sets the wrong frame. You are overtly trying to impress them, it makes you look weak and needy. You shouldn't have to do anything overtly special to start a conversation. You need to set the vibe that you are someone that everyone like to be around. You can do this 2 ways

1 actually becoming that person in a way that doesn't sacrifice your unique personality. Think you with an exclamation mark at the end,or a common phrase around here "your best self". (this should be your end goal it is most effective, and enlightening)

2 Imitating it or following other people's instructions VERBATIM. Kind of like how most people follow the Mystery Method (MM) or things they read in "The Game" without understanding exactly how and why it works. More often than not MM will not work because the concepts are not understood and reinforce natural negative behaviors, like feeling the need to validate yourself to others. This school of thought can work and will cause short term gain but more often than not make you worse. People who are effective with this imitation school of thought act the part so much they become the part. Thus landing in the first option but taking far more time and effort to get there.
I'll partially disagree with this. Opening with a magic trick can be the best thing to do if you can bring it good enough. Needless to say it's not going to work if you just do your trick , involve your set in the magic trick , make them part of it. But preferably you want to get another opener and follow up with a magic trick. I would do a magic trick along with a bet something like "You guys ! I bet you I can make 5 bucks out of this napkin , if it works you have to buy me a drink *smile*

If she agrees do your trick and enjoy your drink , but immediately change subject don't stand there talking about your magic tricks.

If she doesn't agree neg her for being a coward and proceed your game.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 30, 2010 2:46 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Never open with a magic trick again.

It sets the wrong frame. You are overtly trying to impress them, it makes you look weak and needy. You shouldn't have to do anything overtly special to start a conversation. You need to set the vibe that you are someone that everyone like to be around. You can do this 2 ways

1 actually becoming that person in a way that doesn't sacrifice your unique personality. Think you with an exclamation mark at the end,or a common phrase around here "your best self". (this should be your end goal it is most effective, and enlightening)

2 Imitating it or following other people's instructions VERBATIM. Kind of like how most people follow the Mystery Method (MM) or things they read in "The Game" without understanding exactly how and why it works. More often than not MM will not work because the concepts are not understood and reinforce natural negative behaviors, like feeling the need to validate yourself to others. This school of thought can work and will cause short term gain but more often than not make you worse. People who are effective with this imitation school of thought act the part so much they become the part. Thus landing in the first option but taking far more time and effort to get there.
I'll partially disagree with this. Opening with a magic trick can be the best thing to do if you can bring it good enough. Needless to say it's not going to work if you just do your trick , involve your set in the magic trick , make them part of it. But preferably you want to get another opener and follow up with a magic trick. I would do a magic trick along with a bet something like "You guys ! I bet you I can make 5 bucks out of this napkin , if it works you have to buy me a drink *smile*

If she agrees do your trick and enjoy your drink , but immediately change subject don't stand there talking about your magic tricks.

If she doesn't agree neg her for being a coward and proceed your game.
haha I've never tried it that way. I'm not shy when doing my tricks its something I know I can do with confident since its something I do all the time. Its after the trick I have the most probs with. I go into small talk and I know to make it as boring as humanly possible (not on purpose of course).

I'll have to try that next time. There are so many different opinions on what one person thinks of one openers verses another but I guess in the end it just comes down to actually trying them out and seeing the responses since not everyone is the same.

I went around my job asking some of the girls I work their feeling on the 2day rule when they give out there number to a guy they've met. Some said they'd want the guy to call them that same day and some actually didn't like the idea of guys calling them on the day they gave there number but waiting 2days until he did.

Finding the perfect opener isn't going to happen I know but I still need a solid mid game to transition into after the opening process so that I don't go into my usual boring small talk which fails over and over again.


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