Regularly piss girls off with too much neg/cocky funny?



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PostPosted: Sun Oct 03, 2010 11:07 pm 
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Hi Guys,

When I am introduced to a mutual friend - I am very confident I do well. I tend to close 60-80% of the time - I am happy with those numbers.

When in field and approaching/cold intros through an acquaintance rather that a mutual shared crowd I bomb...

I get them laughing a little - but I get nervous. I do not know how to move to creating comfort and more serious conversation. I keep relying on my cocky/funny/negging which recently has resulted in me annoying a few girls and them going cold on me. Any clips/articles you can recommend to improve this part of my game? I am really struggling here...

I think one of my biggest strengths is building rapport & deep level comfort with girls - but for what ever reason I cannot do it in field? Guess the kind of conversations I have in private are not suitable for clubs/bars/daytime interactions - especially with someone you have just met.

Thanks in advance...

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 6:12 pm 
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I'm in the exact same boat. I can get a girl attracted to me by negging and being cocky funny etc but I tend to overdo it and end up annoying her.

Anyone who has any advice on what to do, please help! :)


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 8:47 pm 
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With a lot of girls, cocky/funny is good for opening and occasionally asserting your alpha-male dominance, but you need to build comfort and be genuine too. This is where "be yourself" comes in. Keep the banter light and playful, but don't overdo it. If she's not bouncing the ball back into your court, no need to spike it.

Basically, just lay back on it and try not to annoy people any more... then amp it back up occasionally until it becomes "routine" for you.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 9:35 pm 
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If you're pissing people off with your c&f, you've probably got too much cocky and not enough funny.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 05, 2010 3:10 am 
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Quote:
If you're pissing people off with your c&f, you've probably got too much cocky and not enough funny.
Well put.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 05, 2010 4:12 pm 
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Neg like once in the opening few minutes then just stop doing it at all. If you've got any attraction just move toward qualification and comfort. To get rapport going, the best way is to imagine that she IS a mutual friend and just ASSUME it.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 05, 2010 9:55 pm 
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Quote:
Neg like once in the opening few minutes then just stop doing it at all. If you've got any attraction just move toward qualification and comfort. To get rapport going, the best way is to imagine that she IS a mutual friend and just ASSUME it.
I disagree about cutting off neg early in the game. I constantly poke fun at girls throughout our relationship... I do the same to my guy friends, and treating a girl this way acts kind of as a DQ. That said, don't over do it and cut down every little thing she says, but if she says something and you can think of a witty, funny, response to it... Say it!


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 05, 2010 10:41 pm 
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I tend to neg when I think the situation's funny, and when I can quickly move onto something else, but have to keep negs short and sweet, it can get annoying, remember you've only just met these people, they wont know how to take you.

Cocky, serious, funny, nice or cruel.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 06, 2010 12:37 am 
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stay persistant.. & act like u dont know what u did wrong...

make fun of your friends ALOT.. Find the funny ones u have and just Crack jokes on each other till your both hysterically laughing..

it works on your rebuttal skills..

Then just Use your rebuttals to defuse the tension by making them laugh..

Today This chick sent me a text apologizing for not responding to my text last night cuz she fell asleep

Me: Excuseesss
Her: Suck it
Me: Deep Throat me
Her: get the Fuck out
Me: Huh? get out of where u act like im in the room with you? lol
Her: Get Out Of LIFE
Me: Ouch... Ok *jumps out the window*
Her: lol U Still Alive?
Me: No im dead :p
Her: Darnnitt
Me: Lol What a dork, neways what r u doing..
Her: lol oh nothing, blah blah blah

SAFEEEE lol.. Just use that model..


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 10, 2010 9:40 pm 
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I'd say build some rapport after you get three IOIs. Phase shift in building comfort. You may want to isolate. That's an option.


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