Ok. So I've been with my girlfriend for 5 months, almost 6 now. Everything's been perfect, up to a few weeks ago, things started to go bad. Here's the problem: Me.
I get upset about stupid things... When she insults me, in a playful way, I get mad, and then she gets upset that I get mad over such nonsense. This has started the past 2 weeks, and today we had a big fight at school. I was telling in obvious sarcasm how I always exercise at 5 am etc... and she was: "You're such a liar" ... I know she was following my game, yet I got mad!
So then she got upset and we stopped talking for the rest of the day. I then texted her and she told me, that at the beginning of the relationship she always showed her real side so I wouldn't think she's a doll and then a complete witch. She says she doesn't like a relationship with sooo many ups and downs, she wants something stable, not something that we're OK for 2 hours then the next hour we're mad and the next hour we're OK again. And I understand her, I just don't understand me.
Why do I take this shit so seriously?? At the beginning of our relationship she could have said the same and I would've just laughed, I'm being a fucking wuss, and I know it and its screwing my relationship. We agreed we'll both do our best to make things better. I love her!!! And I don't want to be without her, even though I have a line of girls waiting, I want her. So whats my problem? When and why did I became a wuss ??? .... I hope someone can help me or give me some advice and I would be forever thankful!
Thanks!

you became a wuss cause you love her. if in the first couple months you werent like this and now you are cause the stronger feelings you have complicate the relationship. also i think that 6 months is like a hump that happens with relationships. you guys are comferatable with eachother and fight alot more. just try to watch your attitude and be more like you were at the begining of the relationship. hopefully things will work out.

It sounds to me like you might subconsciously be worried that there is a measure of truth to her kidding around, and since you love this girl, she has more of an affect on your state of mind than the average bear. You have correctly identified the problem: you. It's time to do some self-examination and figure out what insecurity you've buried that's causing these feelings, then put it to bed.

Until then, the cycle will continue.

Your boy,
870

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You both are right. I became a wuss because my feelings for her are very strong and it is also true that subconsciously I might feel those things to be true. Anyways, today at school I told her if we could talk and she said she didn't wanted to see me. I could see she had been crying. Now I dont know if i should give her some space so she can clear her mind or what .... This is really hurting me.

I am in the same situation, I just always get angry at everything she does, and the problem is, me. It has been like that with every girl I have started liking, and the reason for that is, letting her into the real man, which is the man behind "the game", the sensitive man.

What I know I shud do, and you should too, is take it chill, think of today, enjoy the moment, AVOID trying to worry, when you worry, tell her, when she does something, tell her, but do not get angry, cus they get angry just as well! I hope I make sense, but what I am attempting to do, is every time I get mad, I act sad, and she always asks whats wrong, and I just say, nothing, which is bad, cus I should tell her what is.... They are angels, but we need to figure out a well to handle our emotions without being wuss's.....

I havn't argued with mine for 9 hours now..... I am sure ill get mad soon, I just dono when, let me know what you think bru

I used to be the same way until i saw the movie Revolver where in the end there are a bunch of psycologist talking about the human ego. It changed my way of seeing things and stopped me from taking things that other people say so seriously. Great movie to
Another thing to think about is when you want someone to see that you've changed you got to show it. Do it gradually and she'll realise that you're for real.

Today we talked and she was like
"its really hard for me to go back to the way things were before and pretend nothing happened" ... then I lost it and was like "Well, I don't know what else to do, I'm asking you for a chance and youre not giving it to me" then I dropped a tear.. she came to me and hugged and said she loved me, kissed me, and nodded..
So we're starting back again, things are not the same as they used to be, but It'll take some time to just build up her trust again. I will try to change and do all my best, and I hope things work out, today she told me several things and just when I was about to get angry I stopped.
It feels good, not having to get angry about everything... I'll let you know how things work out. Right now she's coming to my house to study for an exam tommorow.... Hopefully I'll get some

Man, I've been there with the ups and downs talk. Like just two weeks ago. I wonder what it is that we all have in common?

I hope things go well with your girl and you.

What you all have in common is one-itis... Its ok, it happens... Some of you may disagree but I whole-heartedly agree that just because your in a LTR you shouldn't start reverting to your afc ways...

See if this sounds close: you are feeling angry because you feel she isn't respecting you... Nit only that but you feel like you tell her over and over again what you Need from her and she still refuses to give it to you.. You scream and yell because you feel like your saying the same thing over and over again but she s not listening...

If I'm close I will give some advice.. If none of this resonates with your situation then I will leave it alone...

Later guys...

You are exactly on the spot, what advice you got?

Gambler

First of all just to get an idea of who I am read this post I just commented on what-pua-stuff-works-in-a-relationship-vt73915.html
Now the whole concept of the mystery method and pu in general is to communicate your intent without coming out right and saying it.. There's body language, kino, push-pull techniques that are used to get what you want without actually saying the WORDS!! You want a girl to jump your bones them you tease her till she can't stand it or you make her jealous... t yBut you don't just walk up to her and say "i need you to be horny for me PLEASE! Every body knows that doesn't work!

The same rules apply in a LTR... If you need affection or attention you can't just start talking about all of your insecure feelings... That obviously doesn't work... You have to use"game" to get what you want... Period....

Im at work right now but I will elaborate more when I get a chance... Basically you have tomake these things happen...NOT BEG FOR THEM !! I DON'T CARE HOW LONG YOU'VE BEEN TOGETHER

I youf don't mind, let me approach this from a different angle... Each one of you talk about getting write angry over things that wouldn't have bothered you before... Lets cut through all the bull shit and start by telling me what out is your really upset about??

here s my example: for awhile I had a real need for her to"initiate" sex... Now at the time our sex life was great. We would have great sex 4-5 times a week but I was always the initiator... This began to bother me and I wanted her to initiate sometimes (once a week our hell once a month would have been fine) Well I told her over and over again till I was blue in the gave how much this meant to me and I really needed it and time and time again she would promise but never deliver... I became frustrated and it started to affect my inner confidence... Before I knew it this had became a huge problem for us.....

It took me awhile to figure out the solution............

The question I have for you is what is the"real" underlying problem

the real problem? Well, her being controlling, at times! but not a lot, and my trust for her, due to the fact that she broke up with her 2 year relationship a week before me and her started talking... We are at the beginning of a thing now, and already argue and I get mad because she says that he "calls her" and she says shes hanging with me, and she mentions that she may go on the holiday to see him. So basically, my trust on her that she won't go off with another guy and ditch me.... That's my fear....

What you got in mind? How do I make her want me more than I want her?

Ahhhh... This explains alot... Basically you are the rebound guy and she still has feelings for her ex. You need to treat this like you are not in a relationship... If she is talking to her ex then the best thing for you to do is find other girls to text and talk to yourself... Let her know she's not the only girl around and anytime she mentions the ex ACT LIKE YOU COULD CARE LESS ... During the holidays let it be known that if she gites and visits him then you will party like your single

Buddha was walking into the city market one day and near the city entrance an old bitter man was sitting on a box glaring at Buddha, who carried a bright smile on his face. At the sight of him this old man started cursing Buddha up and down, left right and center, telling him how pretentious he was, how much better he thought he was and how he did nothing worthy of the air he breathed in this world. But Buddha simply smiled and kept on walking to the market to get what he needed.


The Next day Buddha returned to the market and once again that old man was there, this time his cursing intensified, screaming and yelling at Buddha as he walked by, cursing his mother, cursing his father and everyone else in his life.


This went on for the rest of the week and finally as the Buddha was leaving the market the man came up to him, as his curiousity had simply gotten the best of him.
“Buddha, every day you come here smiling and every day I curse your name, I curse your family and everything you believe in” the old man says ” but every day you enter this city with a smile knowing that I await you with my harsh tongue, and everyday you leave through the same entrance with that same smile. I know by speaking to you now that you are not deaf, why do you keep on smiling while I do nothing but scream the worst things I can think of to your face?”


Buddha, with the same smile still on his face looks at the old man and asks “If I were to bring you a gift tomorrow morning all wrapped up in a beautiful box would you accept it?” to which the old man replies “Absolutely not, I would take nothing from the likes of you!”. “Ah ha” the Buddha replies “Well if I were to offer you this gift and you were to refuse then who would this gift belong to?”. “It would still belong to you of course” answers the old man. “And so the same goes with your anger, when I choose not to accept your gift of anger , does it not then remain your own?”