Hi Guys,

There's this girl at my workplace. It began with me and her going in the same cab to the office. I kept my cocky funny stance and eventually we went to a movie after work. All normal. I played no routines except for keeping a tight inner game and being humorous.

Then, on weekend (Saturday), she asked me what I was doing on text. Conversation on text went forward and I did the "Three best things I like in you" on text.

When we met for lunch, I ran cube on her and she was visibly impressed. She said most of it was true. We then went to a movie and I kept making her laugh and all. (All day she kept asking me what was the first best thing to which i kept saying, "You'd stop doing it if I tell you". All canned.)

Then I dropped her to her place and we hugged.

The next day, Sunday, she texted what I was doing. I said I was going to an art exhibition, to which she said "Yuckk!! Enjoy ".. And I maintained that I really went to the exhibition even when I didn't.

Then after sometime she texted "when are you coming back?" to which I replied, "In half hour. Wanna do some fun in the evening." She texted, "guess so...muvi?"

We then went to another movie where she wrapped her hand on to mine. And we kept squeezing each others hand. The I tried the "do you want to kiss me " routine but stopped after "do you want to.." coz I couldn't pull through. Then she was like "Whats going in your mind..." through the rest of the day.

At dinner, she asked me what I thought about her and I said, that earlier I thought that she was one of those slutty kinds but she's actually the opposite and a one man woman." This put her interest level down and turned her bitch shield on. I was an idiot to have said this.

Then when I dropped her after dinner, we hugged in the parking lot and I kissed her. But she didn't let me kiss her on the lips. And then when we were hugging, she said, "I don't even know you well. It;s just been 3 days.."..I said "You dont need to know someone to like him"..The after a goodbye, we parted.

After this, on monday, I texted her to be on time for the cab. She replied,"Ill be late, you carry on" and then neither of us have spoken or texted. She kept quiet at the workplace too. Avoided me.

How do I move it from here. Please help me guys. I want to get in to LTR with her.

Also, we are in India and please reply keeping in mind the Indian orthodox beliefs about kiss and sex and all..


Thanks,

shot yourself in foot with the slut reference---None of them---even the real slutty ones like being told it-- it mightnt be a fatal mistake- but to be honest i think it was---if so chalk it on the old experience board--never do it again and move on to new girls--its a damn pity u said that to someone you work with as well--darn

Personally I think you were doing alright until you choked at the kiss routine. Why didn't you just stick to the "inner game and humour" instead of going "real" to "fake"?

Coffee.

_________________
"At the end of the day these are women's lives we're dealing with, not mere entertainment."

"We are what we repeatedly do. excellence therefore is a habit and not an act."

@herne: I know I shot myself in the foot..big time! Do you think there's any chance of a comeback here?

@AFCcoffee: I didn't know how to K close with cocky funny stuff...so I went with that routine...but I messed it! Please suggest a damage control in this case now.

- Don't date girls at work if you care about your job. EVER!

- You thought you were giving her a compliment with the slut line but you basically called her a slut in girl speak as that is all she heard. As for your kiss routine, you have to build up to a kiss and not just toss it out randomly and for god's sake, if you start towards it, DO NOT BACK DOWN. It's better to be rejected, than seen as a pussy for not following through.

- She didn't kiss you back and said she doesn't feel like she knows you. I've had girls that I've known for two hours make out with me and tell me I'm the most awesome person ever. Then I've had girls that I dated for a month tell me that they're not ready for anything yet. The difference? The attraction and sexual tension was not there in the latter case. This was when I was younger and have since seen my errors.

Please move on and don't try to hook up with her anymore. I hope you can still maintain a good work relationship with this girl and consider it a lesson learned.

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I'd give it a few days to a week break to give her space ect. Try not to run into her at work if you can. However If you do see her I'd make eye contact and try to seem somewhat sorry. Some girls can be very forgiving if they really liked you originally as long as you show some signs of being sorry. My theory on that is some girls might like to feel wanted and if you show no signs of being sorry then it might seem to them you never really cared and you really are a ***hole ect.

However it could take her a while for her to get over it depending on how sensitive she is which is why you need to lay off if not move on for a few days maybe even 10 days.

Then slowly start coming around saying hello ect (if you see her at work).Maybe leave a gift or something on her desk and if you ever get a moment alone with her just flat out apologize and be honest. Be sincere.

You could possibly tell her your feelings if it's appropriate and the moment is right (like just say you really liked her ect.), maybe it'd help her forgive if she felt the same? I mean you have nothing to loose you know? even if it's very AFCish. If anything it might help your work relationship even if it doesn't go beyond that.

If all else fails even if you apologize, then maybe it's better you don't go beyond that. I wouldn't want to date someone who is not very forgiving. People screw up, it's life. Girls say shit they don't mean all the time.

Anyway if that doesn't work then just move on, that's pretty much all you can do.

IMHO the convo(Slut), location(Work) and religion is the biggy here.
There's no come back, slap yourself and move on.
Experience is a bad teacher-you commit mistakes first before learning

_________________
A's Ranks Higher than King and Queen

No I dont think theres any hope for you being with her after that---we are in damage limitation here---think u should show remorse and apologise for what was said--in about a week having stayed out of her way as best u can in the meantime---the best outcome on this situ is that u can be friendly towards each other while at work and she doesnt regard u as a creep--other than that zilch--ur gonna have to just learn from this and move on--and dont kick urself everyone f88ks up just dont do this mistake again

Thanks all for your suggestions...

I'm from india too !!

have done many mistakes myself,
some pretty embarassing and downright stupid !!

Just try to land in the friend zone as now the aggressive pick up won't work !!
also u just can't ignore this girl and let her go to hell as she's your co-worker, u hve to have good relations with her so to not affect your professional life !!

Now the next tip is i think more suitable to guys and situations that we encounter in India coz of the somewhat paradoxical conservative situations we confront here....

when one is a beginner in pick up, he should not use it too aggressively in his social circle or with colleagues as you are prone to make mistakes and some fatal mistakes can cost you some close friends and even your job !!

if you actually wanna be an expert in pickup and go beyond borders to see how much you are capable of accomplishing then you should develop a parallel social circle just for this pick up thing.......same as "Neil Strauss" did and became "Style".

I know this is a big thing to manage and style was into this thing 24x7 for 2 years but you ve to keep the two world apart atleast in the beginning !!


once u ve done ur share of mistakes and brushed up your skills, jump into your real world and enjoy !!!!!!!