So after no luck on POF, I decided to create a spoof account & stick up a picture of a random HB.

Within 5min I had 3 pages of messages. Then within a few hours, 15 pages!!!

Mostly consisting of boring "hey how are you?" lines. I decided to suss out these people and find out what I would genuinely be interested in replying to. It got the point where I would look at a msg for 3 seconds and ignore it, even if the guy seemed pretty cool. It was just that...out of all these msgs very very few stood out. In fact so far, I've even stopped replying to a lot of people who seemed interesting at first, because they suddenly became 'wussy' and boring. Just no substance to the conversation. Mostly descended into them wanting cybersex.

Things that got my attention:

-Correct grammar and spelling. I simply ignored messages where people typed like this: hi h0w ru goin?.

-People not saying "omg you're so beautiful, how are you single!?!?"

-People saying they want to find out more about ME, without adding it "babe or sexy"

-Profiles where people had stated their intentions clearly and not been TOO ambiguous, but also with a bit of spice. aka humour

-LONG messages, even if they turned out to be wussy, I felt compelled to read them simply because of the sheer information that had given me.

-Honesty. Even if people were asking for a hookup and it was well written, I felt compelled to reply & say "I'm not into hookups, but I appreciate you being upfront".

I just started ignoring people at a whim because well...there were so many other messages to go through. Why talk to Mr. Joe average when something interesting could popup?

NOTE: I've also found that on my 'real' account, girls will reply to 'mean' messages just to rip you a new a-hole. But if I send something nice I see "read deleted" pretty quickly. Just testing out both extremes here.

My goal is to figure out what makes people stand out just by their messages. Because I didn't even have any desire to look at peoples profiles if they seemed generic.

Will report back soon!

Its not that hard to stand out from all of the generic messages girls get. The hard part is grabbing their attention with it long enough to get them reply back and waiting for your reply back. You see online dating is very much like advertising, more exactly online advertising. The better advertiser you are the higher chance of closing with the girl. In generally this means using words in fancy dancy ways as well as doing the same with your pictures. As people have very short attention spans when it comes to online advertising. Much shorter than they do for real world advertising.

Also another thing you may have notice. Girls pretty much don't read the about me section of your profile. They look at your pictures, stats (ie height and maybe some other things) and decide if they are interested or not. And girls do reply to those online liners, but only to model looking guys or guys with model like pictures.

I think your initial response just needs to have an impact. For instance using a false critique:

eg. Your boobies look so big, are they real?

Something that will make them want to answer you back. Because once they do, you've pretty much got them to invest which I think is also the other component to keep a conversation going.

_________________
"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

The thing is you don't have them them invested once they reply back to you. All you done really is got them hook enough to reply back. To get them invested you need them to drive the conversation. By that you need to get them reply back more than a simple reply back to you. Something more along the lines of a short paragraph. Think of this as if you are a sales person (which in many ways you are here). How would you go about selling the product which in this case is you?