@fakehighfive:
It seems to me that you're focusing WAY too much on kissing. Envision the follow-through, go for the day two more than the kiss... I'm not saying not to kiss the girl, but it's not the main priority. Leave her wanting more and you'll get more. It's truly a "less is more" scenario. I wish I knew that when I was 16!

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Life is a game. Win.

thanks man even though it's simple it's something that didn't even occur to me! I'll keep that in mind as it's a big help that's much appreciated!

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:p

Dear Medic,

I go out on wednesdays with a couple of mates mainly to dance and sarge, generally I get one number and a few kisses throughout the night. Its nearly all dance floor game but at the end of the day my true problem is AA and its magnified by feeling a sense of leadership. I introduced my mates to game and now everytime we go out they are looking towards me to act first. I want to be self motivated and break that barrier but I am losing my state control at the moment. Its not that I dont have women in my life, I just feel nearly impotent until I get the first girl of the evening. I think I need a way to relax and focus that shit away before I sarge, what do you suggest to fight feelings of pressure?

MEDIC hey man, quick question! I'm not being arrogant, but i keep getting girls say i'm hot etc, and as a result get girls grabbing my ass when i go to the bar... Girls that i'd not even seen in the bar that night. Happened on a stag do recently and everyone was expecting me to turn round and open... But i bottled it, as i didn't know what to say or how to act... Seeing as they have effectively just opened me it should be easy, right? But for some reason i just have a brain fart and my natural tongue in cheek nature goes out the window and i can't think what to do... Help please!
Valiant

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It'll do a trip!

Hey medic im still new to the whole scene and cant wait to learn everything possible lol but big thing i need help with is getting the confidence to meet chicks just around. At partys im fine but say if im out at the movies and theres these really hot chicks i wanna be able to just approach them and give it ago. You got any tips ? thanks

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[{A;;C;;E}]

Hi Medic,

My game is all over the place. I have some issues with AA, and obtaining attraction from a cold approach, but my skills with mid-game and closing are pretty good.

I want to get over my AA, and thus have more success closing, but I have a limiting factor: It is simply not feasible to bring girls back to my place (for a variety of reasons). This understanding adds even more concern to pulling the trigger (more than just normal social anxiety), since I have no specific goal in mind.

Therefore, my question is: How do I close girls without being able to bring them back to my place? I feel the obvious answer is, "Go to their place," but in what ways is that done? It seems like an even greater challenge.

Thank You,

Tal0n

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If the dream is won
Though everything is lost
We will pay the price,
But we will not count the cost.
-Rush

medic, ive became really popular in my area for shitty game, rudeness, desperation. u kno the list goes on. at this point its depressin. wat shd i do

Thanks for the response! It sure is one hell of a community with all the advice!

This is the only real aspect of him that pisses me off. I've talked to him in a similar way before, however I wasn't straight forward with it, so I'll have to do that.

Also, are there any good, 'friendly' AMOG tactics that you may know of? I've done some searching, but all the things I've found are the opposite of that. I suppose if I have to be hardball about this, I will. Because the way he's playing this shit, is ridiculous.

The way I've been 'picking' up girls lately is just all in a friendly manner. Nothing my girlfriend is bothered by. I have to keep practicing my game, even if it is on a small level.

hey medic, i need some advice here on how to go on:

i have no problem approaching women. I also don't have a problem attracting women. But this is always just in case that i'm only interested in sex.

Whenever I actually have a real interest in a woman, i start acting diffrent. I get nervous and i lose my charm...I don't know why that happens.

Anyways.. I've met this girl at a coffee shop that i go to 3-4 times a week. She's new there and i like her a lot. Because its seems to be a familiy business and i didn't want to cause any trouble, I just handed her a piece of paper with my facebook address, a smiley and the words: "say hello"

she never did. so the next time i saw her (like 2 weeks later) i walked up to her smiling and told her: you didn't say hello!

she was like: yeah i know, i don't have facebook.. i have deleted my account. i was like: "ok, say hello now"

we talked a little bit and then she was: listen, the other reason why i didn't say hello is that i'm engaged, i just forgot to put my ring on today...

I think it's bullshit... she is throwing me a test or probably an excuse cause she wants to get rid of me. I know, if she'd agree to have a coffee with me sometime, she's gonna like me, even if she doens't right now.

But I don't know how to react to that.... her claiming to be engaged... I mean.... if she really is, I'm not interested in intervening and stuff. But she is superhot and i'm very curious about her. She's not like other girls so I don't wanna give up that easy.

she's not attracted to me. but i didn't have the chance to build up attraction. the situation makes it hard to do that because:

she's working at that coffee place, so she always has 2-4 other co-workers right around her, which makes it uncomortable for her to talk. What makes it even harder is, that this seems to be a family business, so that she acutally has family members around her all the time and she's from turkey, so they are quite protective (even though they haven't behaved that way towards me yet).

all i want is to have the chance to talk to her in some other environment with some privacy and have the chance to show her who i am. if she then still doesn't like me - ok no problem.

i just don't know how to convince her to go out with me once, even if she's not attracted to me right now.

do you have any advise on how i can make my move at this point?

Sorry for the long story..

I want to jump in an mention a similar problem, basically the first few lines of the quoted post above.

When you don't reaaaally care about the girl, its easy to be the perfect entity of yourself, but when its someone you really like, you get all stutter stepped.

Its the AFC coming out from inside.
The logical solution for it would be 'REPRESS! Never let it show!!"

but its this funky thing.. when you're with the less cared about girl its great, but you're not really yourself but you don't mind. When you're with the special girl you're strange sometimes but you feel you need to show them yourself. If you were acting infront of them you'd feel like you were performing grand treason.

So how is it you should act with these special girls? Not just some hot chick you really really really wanna fuck. Like real diamonds, you know.

I think there has to be a 50/50 negotiation between your AFC self and your PUA self. OR NOT. But, you know.. for me I wouldn't wanna feel that I'm tricking someone I really care about. And if you'd like to start a relationship with them then its good for them to at least see half of your weird side.

But maybe that should always be happening, there should always be that 50/50 split.
I might be wrong.[/b]

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it HAS to look and sound real.

Please help me!!!

Hello.
I have serious issues approaching. It's probably AA. I'm trying on improving my energy levels because I want to do direct openers because they seem easier because your straight to the point but hard because I wouldn't have a high vibe if I'd approach. I'm saying openers as high as possible when I walk alone and try to be way more outgoing when I interact with people. I know that my main issue here is my low vibe. Can you guys please help me!!! What are some things I can do to be outgoing, like those kind of people that are loud and say anything and are so random. I want that kind of personality. I sometimes behave like that but its rare and I always forget to use NLP to anchor the feeling with a body movement. I've discovered the PUA community this year and I have been learning and changing dramatically for the good this pass months and feel really good. The only thing I have done is said hi to this 10 when I sat next to her, she said hey back. It was like an auto instinct I didn't even think about it which was super cool. Anyways I'm a Senior in High School. Can someone tell me how to be outgoing like those kind of people please, I would do anything? Can you also please tell me which direct opener is great to use in high school like during lunch :DDD!!!

If you think its something else that it my problem let me know please.

Thank you in advance!

P.S. I've never had a girlfriends or kissed a girl.

no thanks

Hi Medic

I am in a relationship currently, and even though my girlfriend is quite hot, I believe I have been able to hold the position of a dominant man with my personality and the ability to be a challenge. I face problems when it comes to balancing the act of being a challenge though, which I guess can end up making you seem like a jerk.

So in short:

How do you think I can improve my ability to be a more genuine and a balanced challenge?

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Women are plenty, time is not.

hi medic, really helpful thread for a newb.

So i'm new to this and am having success approaching and number or email closing. After that I freeze. I feel like my phone call timing and the content/feel of my voicemails are really awkward.

What do I do once I have a number? Do you leave voicemails? How do you avoid coming off needy? And how do you build attraction from afar?

Medic,

MERCI BEAUCOUP

I want to thank you for opening up this thread. It served as my catalyst to sign up for the website and buy bunch of shit from Gambler ... so his commission cheques should have your name on it. One of the things you emphasize in your replies and which helped me make that last step was your #1 PUA rule: leave her in a better place than the one you found her in ... it's more than just karma, it's the life philosophy i could identify with whether we are talking about girlfriends, friends or just random people who's path we cross on this journey called life. I left all of my old girlfriends in a better place. I thought of it as a very small but important way I can make this world a better place. But I still left them ... and it's not because of them ... "no, it's not you ... it's me" actually rings very true here ... as i was too paralyzed to win over the girls i really wanted to be with ... instead of further introducing myself as so and so ... i'd share a field report with you instead ... and yes, there will be questions in the end ...

LAST DROP IN THE GLASS?

the moment of major frustration actually happened few weeks ago in london, england as i was out with my friends ... it was a good night and i didn't use any gaming material (just ended a four-year relationship - no clubs, few parties ... i was in love to the point that other girls didn't matter ... jesus i was going to marry the girl but ... as time passed it became obvious she wasn't the right one ... it was time to let her go) ... i read Style's game before I met this girl ... used it in a very limited way just before i entered that relationship so very little game skill remained, if i ever had any ... it wasn't until few days ago i thought that it doesn't make sense to delay my progress anymore ... i need to work on the game and myself to attract the women i WANT to be with ... but let's get back to the party ... finished with couple of girls asking me for facebook info, a tall pretty hot american 8 making out with me giving me her number and few other girls showing genuine interest .... so where is the problem??? very early the night i made eye contact with a jamaican 10, hands down the best girl in the club that night ... few other things happen eye contact here, there, gesturing that dj sucks - she laughs with her friends ... dance floor interaction ... but anxiety is there ... the night was great but i had no courage to approach her until the end of the night as she was leaving ... at which point we exchanged few lines and agreed to meet non-committaly at the next event a week after

week passed ... a boat party ... looked forward to it, counted days, hours ... couldn't get the girl out of my head ... came to the boat party leaning against the wall chatting with my buddy ... she walks out of a car with bunch of friends, different ones from the last party ... we make eye contact and i take a step forward, she comes close with a big smile on her face and i tell her "I'm glad you showed up." ... relaxed body language and good tone ... she says "Me too!!" as her body twists in a playful shape .... "She's into me ...." crosses my mind and then BAMM ... freeze ... i felt like a 15-year old .... there was a window to opportunity to talk to her right then and there and i missed it ... later i approached her again, chatted, opened up the dance floor together ... blah blah blah but as time passed my AFC impulse was taking over everything and i mean everything ... tension so tick you could cut it with a knife ... in about 30 min she turned cold and i knew i killed that one ... a 10 ... and i don't think it was the absence of game that was the core problem ... it was the level of comfort/confidence that i was completely devoid of ... in front of 10s i freeze

CRITICAL MASS

for the girls during the first night ... some of them 8s it didn't take effort ... i felt confident and as if no matter what i did i could have their number by the end of the night ... conversation was coming to me as easy as the one that i have with a buddy about basketball ... but with the 10 my confidence did not reach that critical mass or tipping point ... and all the chances that were coming my way were blown not for the lack of routines, lines ... etc. it was lack of confidence and that tension between the two people that erects itself when one of the people is not feeling comfortable ...

QUESTIONS

1. When meeting women one of the standard questions i get asked is what do you do ... I don't want them to know, at least initially, for two reasons ... it's a pretty good job and i don't want to create an economic incentive in her mind ... more importantly, i don't want that to be a take-away point after the initial meeting ... so i told few girls last night when i went out that i'm a philosopher and i'm writing a book ... cover was blown by my friend who told them the truth ... they called me on it ... i then asked the girl to reach in my pocket and pull out my wallet ... i showed them the business card and they were pacified ... left a really good impression in the end much better than if i said i was a trader ...

any thoughts or suggestions?

2. I definitely want to work on the game ... ground up but my biggest problem is fear of 9s and 10s ... just approaching them is petrifying ... same fear when approaching 7s and 8s but 100 times more intense ... is there something one can say or do to overcome that mental/emotional block ... the best thing i can think of is to change the frame in my mind and imagine a scenario in which i'm playing with and teasing these girls ... just before i approach them

any thoughts??

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