Hi! A couple of weeks ago I went to this birthday party and I ended up sleeping with the birthday girl... I think I did everything perfect, did the kino escalation in a really smooth way... We had sex, we went to have lunch the following day, then we kept talking on SPAM and texting when I was home, as well as Sunday...

This weekend I was going to go out with her, she seemed ready for it.. We were going to go out on Saturday, I sent her a message and she answered she didnt know about it. I obviously did not keep talking to her, and then at 3 am she sent me an unexpected message telling me that we should leave it for another day (I took this message as a IOI)...

However, this week, she barely responds to me on SPAM... She says 'yes' and stuff like that, and I don't know what to do to bring her interest again.

Any suggestions? What am I doing wrong?

Hmmm maybe bring the chat away from the subject of you two meeting up. DHV yourself, and don't always chat, give her a chance to miss and wonder what your up to. I don't always initiate the conversation with a girl I know all the time.

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Been there, done it, oh and still doing it!

: Blog entries@ http://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com/

How do I DHV myself if she barely talks to me? It's like:

Me: how are you doing today?
She: good.

It's hard for me to know what she wants. 5 days ago it seemed she wanted to go out with me, she even brought the subject, but right now it's really hard to start a conversation, and she doesn't start them either.

But yeah I guess I'll stop talking to her, and then when she comes back talking to me I'll DHV myself.

If she just says good, and not even "you" don't chat to her, or be sarcastic " Yeah I'm good, thanks for asking" often annoys girls and they say sorry.

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Been there, done it, oh and still doing it!

: Blog entries@ http://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com/

Why don't you just ask her what the hell her deal is..how is anybody on this forum supposed to know whats going through her head.. we can tell you what you did wrong but you didn't really supply any details as to what you talked about with her, what you texted her... etc

judging from what i read so far though, she seems angry at you for whatever reason. you guys already had sex so youve already taken whats precious from her. so i doubt shes playing hard to get

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"...so it goes"

funny message :p

I know no one can know what's going on through her head, but wanted to know the best way to act in a situation like this, if I should try talking to her, asking her wtf is going on like you said, or just ignoring her... I'll try talking to her today, would asking her is she is mad for some reason would be DLV? Let's assume she is a bit mad, and a bit weird as well since she might be scared of a relationship (she just finished being with some crazy dude like 8 months ago)... How can I approach her DHVing myself but at the same time showing a bit of interest and trying to get a response on whether she still wants to go out or she wants to stop seeing me?

Thanks for any suggestions, if I don't get any in the next 3 or 4 hours I'll probably act by myself and post results here!

Bro before you proceed. Get these stupid acronyms such as DHV/DLV out of your head. Sure there is an idea of lowering your value/ increasing your value. But at this point, if you really like her, you just have to just show her youre a great/nice guy.

Don't take every term you hear on this forum to heart. You're not "DLV'ing" if you ask her what the matter is, its only natural to ask her what the hell is going on if you banged her last week and now shes cold shouldering you. You dont have to "DHV" in the sense people think of here (such as telling stories that you have a friend thats a girl blah blah blah).

By showing her you actually care about her even after you banged her, it'll come off as a natural DHV. I hope soon you realize that these "steps" , or the blueprint this forum/PUA gurus provide is just a guide to become a better man and not a robot (not that im calling you one)

*EDIT* just make sure you dont come off creepy if youre going to ask her what the matter is

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"...so it goes"

Sorry I gotta disagree with both of these guys this is a case of GAME OVER... move on bro its just one chick... thats some dudes problems they don't know how to see quality if she slept with you same night u meet her... probably not quality... but either way "short wording is a BIG sign of lost interest lets rap this shit up" this was probably a case of giving her too much too early and she got bored....

Actually I did not clarify on this, but she used to work in the same company I was for like 2 months. I do agree with giving too much early as we did everything really fast, sex, going to eat, and planning to see again really fast. But we knew before even though we did not talk that much.

I don't agree with 'quality/sleeping same night you meet' relation. We are 25 years old, not 15.

@Patrick: You are right in all you said. I just feel sometimes I lose value for showing way too much interest. Maybe I should just cut down a bit on that.

Just chatted with her. Tell me what you think.

[10:40:45 AM] ME: :@
[10:44:37 AM] ME: You don't talk to me anymore. You left me this weekend
[10:55:30 AM] her: luqitaaaa
[10:58:36 AM] her: you always talk to me while I'm at work
[10:59:31 AM] ME: hmmmm
[10:59:46 AM] ME: cause outside of your job it's hard to find you!
[11:02:19 AM] her: It's true that I don't get online that much now
[11:02:34 AM] her: I don't have much time and I'm always very tired!
[11:02:38 AM] her: especially when I have dancing classes
[11:02:42 AM] her:
[11:08:43 AM] ME: So what are you doing this weekend?

She didnt respond yet to my question about the weekend :p

Nah you are continually asking her to go out. That's not a bad thing inherently but in this instance we can see she's seeing you as predictably asking her to go out every time you guys talk.

What you want, is for her to want to go out with you, and start giving you offers. That won't happen the way you're going.

Keep her on the side. Forget about convincing her to go out and start focusing on other girls.

When you do talk to her, be fun, flirty, don't be all like "how was your day", say strange off beat things (as long as they seem funny to you), or say something interesting that happened recently (even something that was entertaining that happened a while ago but pretend it was recent), anything else than the usual "get to know you" speeches. If you are being all fun and happy, and she is STILL not responding, just go "Gotta go" and log off. Leave it. After that, she contacts you first, or nothing happens at all.

The bottom line in this situation? Don't expect too much, just do your best to be attractive and independant and entertaining, and show that you aren't tied to her conversation - leave when you need to - or create a false time constraint, and always be the one to end the conversation.

She completely ignored your weekend question - you're really in the negative. REALLY REALLY don't expect much out of this one. The only slim chance you have is to just simply stay in touch with her, being attractive, not asking to go out. That's the ONLY way.


Also phone calls are the only real way to demonstrate how attractive you are. Have confidence that you can make the conversation funny and interesting, by playing off what's going on, and know that you will end it. When the situation is this bad, best to have a point to the phone call - some cool event that's happening that she might be interested in. Save the phone call till you have something cool, or a group outing or something. Just keep in contact with her on chat.

I was thinking on leaving her on the side... But she called me last night at 6 am... I ignored her call and sent her a text message this afternoon telling her 'I don't understand... All week long you barely talk to me and now I can see you called me last night at 6am'.

She sent me a message on facebook a couple hours later telling me something like 'really? Did I call you at 6am? Sorry!!!'

I got really mad with this response and told her I don't want to play stupid games. Told her the truth, that I would have liked to see her again but it is really lame that it is so hard to talk and then she calls me at weird times and she doesn't even know that (she also sent me a message last week at 3 am with something really retarded as well)

I don't know if I did the right thing, but what I felt for sure. I think that if she wants to see me again I deserve an apology. I also told her I'm not gonna be chasing her. And I erased her from facebook.

Tell me what you think

Well done man, best thing, iv had exactly the same problem this week, seeing some girl, shes keen, doesnt stop txtin me etc... sleep with her then shes a dick.
so i said to her... is it even worth my time to keep trying with you?
then she replied back saying it was me being off etc...
i had turned into a blubbering mess of desperation, but if u think uv lost her, i thought, fuck it, il just say that.

Now seeing her tonight... shes been texting me more now etc...

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Law of Attraction

see i kow what your talking about same thing is happing to me but in my case i didnt have sex with her yet...shes playing hard to get even tho she said she wants it im just gonna wait to hear from her im in the same boat

There you go, thats the kind of mindset you should always have. You're a man right? Then start acting like one more. You dont like games? Let her fucking know. You think you deserve an apology? Good, you do, because she sounds like one of those annoying girls that fucks with guys' heads. But dont let girls like that get to you. Remember, you're a man

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"...so it goes"