I work at a restaurant and I served a family that was visiting the local university that I just graduated from. I gave them, and their daughter (whom they were there for), a lot of information on the place and then gave her my e-mail in case she had any questions

She sent me an e-mail, thanking me, so I friended her on Facebook.

Flashforward a few weeks: I put up a status that just a quote of a poem, and she comments on it letting me know she's coming to my school. A public exchange ensues:

------------------------------
HB: oh hey guess what

ME: What?

HB: going to binghamton:]

ME: Awesome! We'll have to hang out sometime when you get here

HB: mhm:]
and i see that you breathe fire?

ME: Well, aren't you the perceptive little Facebook stalker?

HB: facebook is for stalking. duh?
HB: i can do the stupid light-the-inside-of-my-hand-on-fire trick
woo

ME: Haha! Nice.

Yes, I breathe fire, eat fire, juggle fire, ride a flaming unicycle, dance through fire...

I do many strange and wonderful things.....

HB:with fire, apparently. very cool haha.
hm...i light everything on fire. everything. i burned a whole pack of 5 gum wrappers in my anatomy teacher's sink to show him how they change color. he wasnt too thrilled, but hey.

ME: Wow, crazy lady. Remind me to the lighters away from you

HB: i'd tell you i mellowed out but then i'd be lying. going to a bonfire tonight after i get out of work. guess who gets to start the fire??

actually, not me. no one really trusts me, go figure.

-------------------------------------

I then had to leave so the exchange ended there. I sent her a message two days later:

Hey,

Unfortunately I had to cut our little exchange short the other day, I went off to attend the First Friday art walk. Ended up at this really sick loft party after I chatted up a mask-maker--go figure!

How was your bonfire?



She responded:

cold haha
i haven't drank in about 6 months because of a guy
and i drank for the first time friday b/c he's a douche and i shouldn't have let myself fall for him.
i had 23 shots of assorted vodkas, jd, and tequila
and didnt feel a thing.

buddy alcoholic? i think so haha.

oh man my life is so fucked right now lol i have no liver.


And then sent another message shortly after that to correct *budding*

I was doing fine before, but now I'm made unsure by her last message. The whole thing with the guy who's a douche makes me feel like I've got some shit test being thrown at me, while the 23 shots thing sounds like some sort of qualifying.

So, my question is, what do you think she is throwing at me here? And in what way do you think I should respond?

I graduated, but I'll still be in the area when she gets here, and I'd like to see what I can make happen with this girl. I'm fine once I have the girl, but my online game is absolute shit.

_________________
If the dream is won
Though everything is lost
We will pay the price,
But we will not count the cost.
-Rush

FAIL. You didn't close. You lost the sale.
FAIL.
FAIL.



She responded:
You sound like a pussy.
Stop it.

Move on, and chin up.
Be happy.

Rune,

I think i love you

Rune, thanks for the very detailed response. I've been enjoying reading your posts elsewhere on the forum.

Just for clarity's sake, she lives nowhere near me at the moment. The whole point is that she was just visiting my town while looking at the college.

As for the "buddy alcoholic" statement, that was all part of her correspondence to me. From the point she responded to me, I did not return her message.

And I entirely agree with you, Rune, about not thinking, and I've been nodding along as you've said it in your other posts. It's something I've always been able to practice live with a girl, or even on the phone. But sending things out in cold, hard text makes me uncomfortable, so I definitely freeze up sometimes.

Anyway, thanks. And if anyone else has some advice, I'm still open to hearing it.

_________________
If the dream is won
Though everything is lost
We will pay the price,
But we will not count the cost.
-Rush

So, I tried the whole stop thinking thing. I put myself in frame and just went about responding as if I was talking to her in person. Just to show what happened in the last few hours:

MY RESPONSE:

"A girl who knows how to drink? You'll do fine at Binghamton.

Although, 23? Felt nothing? I think someone's fibbin' a bit, but you should probably lay off the bottle for a bit, you lush.

Anyway, in the interest of being fair, I tried to FB stalk you, but you have nothing up! Your Bio is an ellipsis! wtf? How am I supposed to come up with pithy remarks about your personality in random online conversation now?"


HER RESPONSE:

"true story
i swear lol. after my sophomore year, i have no liver, and the highest tolerance ever.

lol why lie?

lol questions about my personality??"


MY RESPONSE:

" "Who are you really? And what were you before? What did you do and what did you think?"

First: a thorough and stimulating answer to the aforementioned questions.

Second: if you can tell me what movie that's from you instantly become my new favorite person (hint: read it with Humphrey Bogart's voice)"


HER RESPONSE:

"i dont watch movies
ever
and i dont know who humphrey bogart is

ahem

i am a teenage girl, trying to forge and maintain relationships that prove to be healthy and entertaining; someone who is still figuring out who they are, and someone who thoroughly enjoys and abuses the ambiguity of her identity. who am i really? im afraid i cant give you an answer, seeing as im still discovering myself emotionally and psychologically. im the type of girl who dunks her grilled cheese in chocolate milk, drives a 1992 volvo, cries hysterically at the sight of spiders, and loves football. im a cynic. im called a hypocrite by those who hate me, a 'walking contradiction' to those who dont. i go days without sleeping, then days where i sleep for 14 hours of the day. i have mood swings that would make the iceman jealous. i gag over my aunts authentic italian cooking, yet love the taste of kraft mac and cheese. im a gemini and live up to my reputation. im olivia :]

before this? i was a flourishing alcoholic who couldnt save herself and needed people to do it for her. before today, i had hope and love and all the things that happy people tell you are out there. i played field hockey. i got good grades. i tried, i loved, i laughed, i played, i felt. now im a little wiser...a little messed up, but wiser.

questions, comments, concerns?"



So that's that. I think it's going well, not a lost cause, and a fun long-term gaming investment. I'm hoping for a fruitful meetup when she arrives here, or perhaps over the summer meeting up in NYC.

For now, I'll keep on with what I'm doing right now. It seems to be working

_________________
If the dream is won
Though everything is lost
We will pay the price,
But we will not count the cost.
-Rush

respect dude

&hearts xoxoxo &hearts
Welcome.
Seize the moment Caesar.
Oh.

...good.
"Thinking" has a dirty sidekick called emotion.

Emotion sways you from your moment, into thinking mode. Why, I don't fucking know; but it's there, and it's apparent.
YAY!
I'll take that to mean you screened out what was irrelevant to the moment.

If so, PERFECT! 100%. A+!
Another soul saved from the mind.

I can die happy now. =p.

Okay, so I was going to just let this thread die, but the response was just too good/funny to not post here in case anyone was interested.


MY RESPONSE:

Comments: My first instinct was horror at yet another youngin' not knowing who Humphrey Bogart is, but then...wow. Someone who actually knows their own self. Even if that self is ambiguous. Someone who's trying to figure it out. I'm impressed, to say the least.

And you're a gemini. Of course you are

And I loved the well-wrought melodrama towards the end. Very nice.

Concerns: I'm sorry to hear about the alcoholism, especially in light of your bonfire expedition, but I'm hoping you have it well in hand.

Questions:

1) Why don't you watch movies?
2) Do you watch TV?
3) Do you read?
4) I'm guessing you're Italian. Anything else, ethnicity-wise?
5) You said you had hope and love and "happy things" before today--do you still have them? If not, what happened today?
6) What does me being a Leo tell you?
7) Do you ever make it out to the City over the summer?


SENT A SECOND MESSAGE A MINUTE LATER

Btw, thanks for that awesome response

Most people don't bother with that sort of thing. *Staring intently ahead, tapping fingers together in front of his nose*Hmmm. I like you.


HER RESPONSE:

well i aim to please.
actually i dont but that sounded right lol.
what do you mean, of course im a gemini????
and im a teenager. melodrama is what i do.

okay

i dont watch movies because i dont really have time or interest...if you tell me somethings a good movie, ill watch it...if not, then i couldnt really care less haha.

i watch criminal minds and the big bang theory...but ill sit down and watch marathons of whatever's on...wife swap, america's next top model, rock of love, dateline, whatever haha.

i read. oh man i read. my mom used to prohibit 'recreational reading' when i was little as punishment. i work at barnes and noble♥

yes, im italian...from naples, to be exact...german, swedish, and greek (hailing from Sparta. fuck yes ;])

no, i dont have hope and love and all that happiness. maybe ill tell you about it one day.

leo? well. you have a personality, and ill initially like you, but my past dating experience tells me to stay away from leos. far, far away.

and yes, i do. half my family lives there, i go there all the time :]




SHE SENDS ANOTHER MESSAGE 22 MINUTES LATER

not that i want to date you lol. just that the only leos i really know are my exes who are douchebags


AND ANOTHER:

oh and i love this kind of thing




THE END




So, yeah, I thought that was pretty funny. She may not want to date me, but this summer could turn out to be a lot of fun with this girl

_________________
If the dream is won
Though everything is lost
We will pay the price,
But we will not count the cost.
-Rush

"Thinking" has a dirty sidekick called emotion.

I think that's pure genius man

How can I put myself in frame ?, you seem to know a lot about not thinking and this stuff haha, not to say your stupid... :p

I aspire to be a cynic and am unsuccessfully finding anything on how to become one D:

_________________
And remember, if you don't make it happen, Nature will unapologetically weed your genes out of existence

- Mystery