I'm gonna use the other night as an example. I was at a friend's house with about 7 other guys. (Large crowd I know!) Another of my friends came over and brought his sister and her two friends with him. Two of the girls were HB 6s while the other was easily an HB 8 (My target). About 5 of my friends immediately got up to talk to HB 8. My strategy was to play it cool and wait for the "hype" to die down a bit.

I made eye contact with her, and would catch her looking at me periodically, but she would never smile. Throughout the night she was always surrounded by at least 4 other guys. What kept running through my mind was the following:

-Is she gonna think of me as just another supplicating AFC if I go game her now?
-How do I AMOG a group of my own friends?
-How do I handle the eye contact situation? Why doesn't she smile?
-Which opener should I use?

The questions aren't really that important. I'm more concerned with getting out of this kind of mental state. Some nights I'll have a perfect game and would've closed that girl with ease, but in this case I couldn't get it (my state) right. I don't understand why it varies so much. Does it perhaps have to do with preparation?

Any thoughts/advice on this would be much appreciated.

i have this problem too i over analyse and there is a reason for it: YOU WANT TO DO THE PERFECT PICKUP EVERY TIME!!!!!!!!!!!

heres the catch the more you analyse the less opportunity it is to go out!

sometimes you have to just go out an do it then analyse afterwards not before

I recommend Eckhart Tolle- The power of Now for you. It will make that inner voice of yours to shut up. I used to have the same problem. Always analysing, rarely acting. Too much ego involved. Check out the book, it also comes as an audiobook.

Also, JUST DOING IT like crazyone and Nike suggest helps. Meditation might also be of help.

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Hi Teddy, were you smiling at her, or just looking her way? Is it possible she was just mirroring your behaviour?

I was sitting with a couple of friends on one side of the room while she was with a few others on the other side. I caught her looking at me a couple of times. I didn't smile as the eye contact only lasted about 2 seconds.

I don't really see how she could be mirroring my behaviour since she would already be looking at me when I wasn't looking at her.

I would have smiled at her bro... its amazing how powerful a simple smile can be.

its simple, she looks your way bc shes interested, you catch her doing this, make eye contact, and smile

pretty much, you acknowledge her interest, and demonstrate yours, however, you separate yourself from the idiots trying to hit on her, you pretty much say "yeah, i think your cute... but im not about to devalue myself to try and get your attention"

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"Be the change you wanna see in the world" -Gandhi

Thanks. I've pretty much made that realization by now. We've digressed a bit from my original post though. This situation was merely an example, not really the point of the post. I'm trying to figure out how to "fix" my mental state on nights like this when I'm low energy and just not flowing?

think about this:
THAT GIRL YOU WONT ISN'T OVER ANALYSING SO WHY ARE YOU???

EVERYTIME YOU START TALKING TO YOURSELF IN YOUR HEAD STOP!!!

THE RIDE IS THE IMPORTANT THING: when you play a video game do you analyse the game before you start or do you go with the flow just go with the flow!

WOULD YOU BUY THE CHEAT BOOK TO A VIDEO GAME WEEKS BEFORE YOU PLAY JUST TO MAKE SURE YOU DONT SCREW IT UP!!

PICK UP GUIDES ARE FINE WETHER ITS MYSTERY, PUA TRAINING, ROSS JEFFRIES OR WHOEVER THEY WILL GIVE YOU A STRUCTURE AND FRAMEWORK BUT YOU, YES YOU WHO WILL HAVE TO DO THE WORK!!!

I WILL GUESS WHY YOU DO IT AS WELL: YOU DONT WANT TO BE LAUGHED AT OR RIDICULED OR SHOUTED AT!!
IT DOESNT MATTER THINK ABOUT THE FACT YOU HAVE A 99.9% CHANCE YOU WONT SEE THEM AGAIN AND IF YOU DO TTHEY WILL SIMPLY IGNORE YOU AND LET THEM IF THEY ARE A BITCH LET THEM ELIMINATE THEM SELF FROM YOUR WORLD!!!

i think thats the most important question here.
also sometimes theres just no way you could get a chick without pulling risky stunts noone dares to actually go through with outside their imagination.
just one warning: preperation is the opposite of good work on your state, you cannot prepare or even repair your state in any way. if youre really worried that it might be a general state issue go with the other tips like meditation. i dont know enough about eckart tolle to recommend his books.

Hi Teddy, just one thought that I would like to throw out there and ask other people's advice on too.

I seen an interview with 2 PUAs on Youtube, and they were making the point that they don't even count their first 5 approaches of the night when they are in a nightgame environment because they are getting into the flow of things.

So, is this the case for all PUAs including the top ones?

Does it mean we are all in our own heads unless we warm up and get "into the zone" so to speak?

And does that mean that we will never have a guaranteed level of confidence, even if we get good at this stuff? I mean that voice will always be somewhere and it is how you deal with it and suppress it on any given night that counts??

she is just as worried about her appearance/presentation as you are.

If you mess up, you may never see her again. so its always worth to at least try...

That's a really interesting thought...

I've felt that on nights when I've prepared better, I game better. By that I mean if I've been with a couple of friends prior to going out and I've been able to get my conversational momentum flowing, I'm likely to approach more sets and perform better in them.

I've found the same just with general confidence and eye contact, although I am not yet approaching. The more I have socialised in the day the more I can make confident eye contact, look relaxed and be confident. It's like I have a buzz about me or something. Power of perspective I suppose.