Everything I try to do just doesnt seem to work. I get out of my comfort zone and go to parties. That leads to more social anxiety. I go and approach a girl that leads to more social anxiety. Girls complimenting me and giving me attention that also gives me more social anxiety. Like it feels like everything I try to do doesnt give men any more confidence. In fact, it gives me more fear and anxiety. I remember this past weekend I went to a party with my friend.

Hes a really popular guy and I guess I hit it off well with him. When I get there everyones greeting me asking me questions and shit like that. Guys would be loving this kind of attention but I fucking hate it. Its just that I cant connect with people anymore because I have so much shit going on inside. I cant trust people and whenever I do it seems like they always abandon me or ignore me.

I have an idea where this came from though. A year and a half back I lost all of my closest friends. Im not gonna go around as to why or how but I did and there was nothing I felt that I can do to get them back. That traumatized me. I felt really anxious in social situations and didnt have any confidence in myself at all. Before that, I was a smooth, charming, hilarious, and really fun guy to be around. After, I just became this anxious wreck.

Getting out of my comfort zone doesnt seem to be working. Approaching people doesnt seem to be working. Going out to parties doesnt seem to be working. I dont know what to fucking do and I really, really, really need help.


Thanks

Well man... you have to believe in your self, like you believed in your friends. It's hard to explain but try to "split" yourself up in two, you look at your self like your the man, you are the one everyone likes to hang around. You dont give a shit about what other think about you, because you know self that you are the SHIT. Define your own reality and realize we are only living once and this time of our lives will never come back. It's a hard thing to do. But if you practice everyday on how you see your self you will be better. If you dont give a shit about others opinion and you just do your thing, people will feel confidience when they are around you, they will seek to you and therefor you will look more alpha for the girls you like.

The key is to love life, and your self.

Everyone can relate to feeling like shit at some point. It's all a part of life.

Sounds to me like whatever happened between you and your friends is a big cause for your new anxieties. Getting into details about what happened really isn't important. What is important is that you make amends and lift that burden off your shoulders.

How you handle this all depends on your personal situation. If your interested in being friends again then just apologize and be straight forward. Your old friends will give you opportunity to speak.

If your not interested in being friends, maybe they were dicks, then good for you. No one needs to hang out with a bunch of losers. Find positive and move on.

Hope all turns out well

Pretty much this bro, but i wanna add a few things

"Don't believe in the me who believes in you, believe in the in the you who believes in you" -Kamina

Looks to me like you need to learn to love yourself, i recommend you take up a period of isolation, take some time, and try to seclude yourself as much from other people, create a blank slate on your personality for you to write on, remove all outward influences... Learn who you truly are, the problem with most people today is that they try so hard to live up to other people expectations that they forget who they truly are, and in time, they become, nothing but a bunch of layers. So what to do during your isolation:
First off, take up a passion, something you love, and do it, for example, i love martial arts, and i train every day, whether its alone, or with a sensei. Do this, do it every day, make sure it is something that inspires you, but also something that YOU truly love, forget, about what other people think, remember, this is about you know, there are no other people anymore.
Second, set some goals, write a bucket list, and chase after your dreams, no matter how ridiculous they may be. This is YOUR life, you chose how to live it.
Next, take time, and mediate on who you are, look to your past, what you've accomplished, to those friends you had, and on how they completed you, and on how you can fill those gaps yourself, look at what you look lack, and seek to improve, and remember, that everyone has insecurities, even THE MOST ALPHA ALPHA MALE OUT THERE.
Fourthly, read/watch/listen to inspirational material, no i dont mean that bullshit they sell in infomercial, i mean shit that inspires you presonally, music, movies, books, w/e...
Finally, make sure you do SOME sort of physical exercise, i cannot stress this enough, your body needs to things to be healthy, oxygen, and sunlight, make sure you get enough of this EVERY DAY.

Now i'll leave off with an interesting obvservation...

You remember fight club? i cant remember the exact words, but Tyler Durden pointed out that, people are split in two, the person they actually are, and the person they wish they were like, in psychology this was called the ego and something else i cant remember. Basically what i wanna point out is, USE THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE, aim to be like that person you hope to be, aim to improve yourself, you ideal self will continue to kick up the standards naturally, but sooner or later, you WILL be that IDEAL PERSON

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"Be the change you wanna see in the world" -Gandhi