Is it ok to tease girl's insecurities ?



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PostPosted: Fri Mar 12, 2010 10:13 pm 
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I've been dating this girl for just over 2 months now, and i always tease her about her insecurities. Every time I did she would laugh and playfully hit me, but last night over Facebook she gave me a paragraph being saying it hurts her when i tease her. Should i drop the whole teasing insecurities game or continue doing it?
Thanks - Nick


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 12, 2010 10:49 pm 
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I wouldnt theres other things that you could tease her on and get just as high as a reward. It's high risk and not so high reward imo. When you could just tease her on her laugh or shirt etc. Dont get crazy with it.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 9:45 pm 
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well, its a little late as you must have taken new steps inbetween the post and now but anyways... shell appreciate if you do her the favor of not teasing her in the way she meant when she told you. the most important part is taking her seriously and being understanding, i guess. if the topic has been kinda forgotten by now just wait until it comes up again.
or: the next time you catch yourself teasing her about something again, dont keep the realization to yourself or wait for her reaction - apologize immediately. only if you mean it of course. atleast to me that sounds like the right thing to do.


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 3:29 am 
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You went too far, dude. If a girl goes there and isn't fucking with you, you went to far. Respond with some complements and DHVs.

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PostPosted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 8:41 am 
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If you are consiering these negs

Then stop. Once you get the girl you can stop negging. Maybe every month neg a few times to keep her knowing you are the alpha male she wants


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 3:00 pm 
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Quote:
I've been dating this girl for just over 2 months now, and i always tease her about her insecurities. Every time I did she would laugh and playfully hit me, but last night over Facebook she gave me a paragraph being saying it hurts her when i tease her. Should i drop the whole teasing insecurities game or continue doing it?
Thanks - Nick
Man, you are the full bullshit! The cool relationship build on 3 things:
sincerity
trust
respect


You do this, cuz in past you felt pain in this same way.
You create a bullshit - not a real, cool, happy relationships.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 29, 2010 6:37 pm 
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I think the mistake is just that you kept doing it after getting her, which is not necessary (unless you do it very rarely).

Dude, make sure you understand WHY you are doing these things.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 8:32 am 
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I'm going to take a contrarian position here and say that you should make her feel insecure. However, not directly. Teasing is too direect. You are actually making fun of an insecurity.

But if you can do it in an indirect way, where she doesn't know you are doing it deliberately, you are just highlighting it, then I think that is a good way to hook her. It would also help if she somehow associates as the person who can help her overcome these insecurities or give her something that is missing in her life. Perhaps she is older and you can make her feel young again. Perhaps she lives a mundane life and you can make it exciting. Perhaps she has been to sheltered and you can bring out the bad girl in her. Etc and so forth.

This is mentioned specifically in the book Art of Seduction, and I think it works.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 2:27 pm 
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Really nice topic Nick, i like make hot and hard to get girls insecures for themselves, but in a kind of a funny way even if my point is to make them really insecure. Actually i dont call it insecure, i call it reality.
You make your own reality with her being lower value and you being the prize. You can make that by impressing her or recognizing and showing hers insecurities. ( a lot of times the second one works better, you see drunk people having SHB. This is their technique)

But if a target/girfliend shows me that she likes me i stop making her insecure and i reward her for a good/sexy behavios by complimenting her (see, recognize and show her secures and saying that you are attracting to her -evem with her insecures-). If you see things got bad for you like she have the control of the relationship now you use the neg technique in a FUNNY way, cause if its not in a funny way she will -at the most of the situations- get mad and TIRED of your judge. You say it in a funny way cause her subconsequences dont know what funny, it just take the words.

Again, really nc topic.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 2:54 pm 
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So my answer to your question is:
smtimes neging have been percived like insult and make really feels bad. Use the push pull technique.
You can neg/joke yourself and your insecurities to see how it feels and how to act -by the way this is called selfsarcasm which is sexy to the girls- but if you over do it and going on with making joke of yourself and your insecurities you will start to feel really bad and like you insulte your ownself, you will start to feel that it s not more funny and you develop to the people around the desire of insulting you in a ''funny'' way FOR THEM. So you can make joke of/neg others and laugh with your gf.

I know that my advice are not so clearly cause my english sucks.


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 9:46 am 
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Going back to my earlier comment about not making it seem directed at her. You ever watch acne product commercials? They work by making the viewer insecure about their acne in an indirect way.

They usually depict a super-good-looking guy/girl who has one itsy bitsy teeny weeny pimple on his/her face, which makes him/her miss out on a really fun party or going to the beach or some such. Then they discover this miracle product (whatever they are promoting basically) and suddenly life is worth living again.

The target viewer, who probably has a much worse acne problem, immediately associates this with him/hereself. They think subconsiously: if this amazingly good looking person is self-consious about this one pimple, then I'm perfectly justified in being subconsious about my pizza face (or if nots not a pizza face, its always going to be worse than a single pimple).

So the moral of the story is: I think you can make the person feel subconsious about something by telling a story about someone else, if possible someone better off than them in some way or with higher social value, whaver. They will subconsiously associate it with themselves. Then you have to link the solution to this problem to yourself, that is to say that you are the key to allowing her to get past it.

For example, if someone has lived a sheltered life, you could talk about this girl you know who wished she had done more in her life, etc. And then you position yourself as the badboy who can solve this problem of hers, which she may not even have consiously believed was a problem in the first place.

The tricky part is figuring out what the person is missing.


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PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 6:38 am 
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dont do it. 8)


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PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 6:55 am 
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dont do it. 8)

Very bad advice. You should NOT make fun of a physical insecurity, at least not directly, but you should make the person feel insecure and create tension. Otherwise there is no seduction.


Edited.


Last edited by TheIntruder on Tue May 11, 2010 7:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 7:43 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
dont do it. 8)

Very bad advice. You should make fun of a physical insecurity, at least not directly, but you should make the person feel insecure and create tension. Otherwise there is no seduction.




WOW. do you really believe all of that . Teasing and sexual tension is a must, but you dont need to destroy a girls self esteem, making her feel so bad about herself, that she will date you. You have much to learn my friend. 8)


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PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 7:57 am 
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I mistyped something earlier. I meant you should NOT make fun of a pysyical insecurity, at least not directly. However you should make the person feel insecure, off balance. If she is too comfortable then there won't be seduction.


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