Hey Medic, I posted these questions in a thread of mine in the Relationships section but am very interested to hear your thoughts. I'm a great believer in Natural Game and the development of my own Inner Game, I'm not one for canned Routines (although I've used a couple for fun).

Hope there's not too much here :

1) Being Alpha

What is it that makes someone Alpha ? Is it all about doing exactly what you want to do when you want to do it (within legal/moral grounds) and telling those who don't wish to do it with you to 'k-off ?

An Alpha will always say his true thoughts where appropriate - he does not let anyone disrespect him. He never lets his emotions take over - never gets angry, always stays calm and will happily point out when he doesn't like something and state to his GF that it should stop.

An Alpha basically takes no shit and no disrespect and never apologises for his actions unless they were legally/morally wrong.

Is this the true mindset of an Alpha ? Am I missing something ?

2) Specifics

Phone Calls: Should the GF initiate every call, should the Alpha, should it be 50/50 ? Should you only call when you generally have something to say ? If you've called the past two times, should you let her make the next one ?

Text Conversations: Same as above. Who initiates ? Should it alternate ? How quickly should you reply and who should send the last one.

'I love you': How often should it be said ? Only when you really feel it ? Who says it first ? Do you alternate ?

Dating: If a person says 'No' to a date - next time should you say No their suggestion ? And you should still do something fun on the night they say No ? If the person asks you for a date, you should never cancel other plans but if free can accept ?

Disrespectful: If the GF does something you do not like and you're 100% sure it is worth telling them (e.g. it's not your own personal inner game that's caused it to be a problem), you should remain calm and clearly tell them to stop the behaviour. If they continue it, how do you 'punish' them ?

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Many thanks for any help you can give Tbh I'm learning most of this stuff through trial & error, but if I can avoid some errors with simple advice, I think it'd be beneficial .

Prophet

i know this is medics thread.. but i have to give my input about that alpha behaviour question. sorry if i interrupt medic...

Ruler of your own :the thing that makes someone alpha is being ruler of his own life and emotions. it's doing what you want and YOU decide the moral/ legal grounds, being alpha is also expressing your disagreement with certain (cultural) moral values - Have your own values and life along them.

An alpha does not have to say his thoughts were inappropriate, as long he KNOWS/THINKS his thoughts are innappropriate he can learn his lessons and work on his inner game.
An alpha does let people disrespect him ... he does not give a fuck , people are always disrespecting from negative emotions like jealousy or inpatience. a Alpha never disrespect people who disrespect him because he knows they are led by negative emotions created by ignorance. ( EGO)

a Alpha always express his emotions while staying neutral, from his anger he tries to learn people a lesson - if he gets angry he will turn anger into constructive critisism. A alpha never thinks he's afc even when others consider him AFC , compassion and expressing emotions are alpha as long you don't let your ego take over and draw attention.

An alpha takes shit ... he lets people throw shit at his feet and from that shit he build beautifull castles, people can thow shit at you until they have no ammunition - the only thing they can do is being impressed by your castles.
A alpha has the guts to face someone and apoligize - a alpha never says sorry over the phone or over chat, he visits you at your house and tells you face to face he's sorry. He only says sorry from his own moral/legal values and not the ones determined by others.

Disrespectfull An alpha knows he does not have to punish because revenge and negative emotions make him weaker, he just accept the fact your GF is weak and ignorant and does not know she's disrespecting someone. Punishing is not the ultimate goal, the ultimate goal is to teach someone how to respect someone ! how can you teach that while using revenge and negative emotions ?

you don't have to say love you at all ... every action and every kiss has love in it - it's not what your saying but it's the intention and action that counts.

here comes the big secret ... you only get afc if you think your actions are afc OR if you let others make you think you're AFC.
Same with alpha, your only alpha if your think you're alpha... if you think crying is alpha then you are alpha. this is my opinion about being alpha - everybody got's his own opinion.
by the way prophet ... you are saying GF alot of times

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Hi Medic,
thanks for the reply. Only just noticed I actually missed out the question. But you answered it anyway.

Thank you

P

Hey Medic.

I got comfortable using "Hi, how are you doing. My name is Jason. And you are?" to approach women in school. It seems to work well in school, but some odd reason I find it weird or awkward to use it outside of school. And I don't want to be a one-liner using the same approaching method. I don't want to use canned opener, what else can I say?

I also have trouble keeping a conversation going, more like going from sociable to comfort to seducer. Im fine with sociable but when it comes to comfort or seducing, I get stuck. Any advice?

Thanks so much for this.

-JasonP

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"Entrepreneurship is living a few years of your life like most people won't, so that you can spend the rest of your life like most people can't." -Unknown

Hey Medic.

I think I'm in need of a good ass-kicking...by my girlfriend, as well as you.

Here's my question;

While I was on holiday in Bali a couple of weeks ago, despite not being remotely tempted to cheat on my girlfriend the entire time...the girl of my dreams found me in a club I had just walked into. She wanted me, and over the course of the night I began to realise I seriously wanted her too.

I'll spare you the details, but I spent the night with her and we've been messaging a fair bit since I've been back home. The thing is...I love her. Either that or I'm lusting over her...

It was a one night thing, but I've become quite attached in such a short time and this can't be a good thing.

I really want to pursue this further and see her again, and again. She is everything I've always wanted...which has now made me feel like I'm wasting time with my current girlfriend. Who I programmed into being the most loyal thing on two legs.

I guess I just want to know if there's something I can't see properly because I'm blinded by love/lust for this other woman?

She's English and I've always wanted to be with a pom since I was 17. They are the girls for me.

Cheers!
Jase.

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Who are YOU?!

Dear Medic

Two questions here. Is there such a thing as "too smooth"? Sometimes when I'm talking to a chick its like they can tell that I talk to a lot of chicks or something, say something along the lines of "Are you just a hoochie or something?" I brush it off ("No, I can just talk to people easily. Have you never had a conversation with someone before?") But ya.

Second question. When gaming a lot of girls at once do you ever feel insincere because you've said the things you're saying to other people? You know? Kinda like butter spread over too much bread? Maybe I just need to develop more routines (or, as I like to put it, more stories to tell, more ideas to share, more interesting things to bring up) but ultimately you're gonnna tell them to other girls too. I don't know. What do you think? I think it's great you're helping people out by doing this and I'm hoping you can give me some insight. Thanks dude!

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it HAS to look and sound real.

I've been scoping out this bird who has read the game before. I think she is currently reading mystery method.

Would this make it easier or harder to game her?

Advice appreciated mate. (Hell, she even suggested I read the game - subsequently i'm here on this forum)

Gentlemen, my apologies for the delayed response.

@JasonP
Keep in mind that it's not a natural act to cold approach, allow yourself to feel a little uncomfortable. Secondly, you can use situational openers, as long as you can follow them up with something of substance and a DHV. I know that some of the gurus dissuade the use of situational openers. Also, I don't find much of a problem with the canned openers, as long as you don't become dependent on them. I know that I have, previously, condemned canned openers, this is because newer members of the community can get caught in the trap of relying on them solely. Canned openers are a crutch. If you're going to use them, I recommend making your own, don't use someone else's, it usually won't be right coming out of your mouth.

As for keeping the conversation going, I always fall back on travel. I'm a fairly avid traveler and I have some crazy stories. Even not-so-crazy stories can be juiced up to draw in the listener. Give her something to relate to, relate to something of hers.

@Anytime
First, I am a little jealous that you went to Bali.

Secondly, you messed up. I don't believe in cheating on significant others. Come clean. It'll damage you for a while, but it's a self created circumstance. Be a man and step up.

Okay, are you done doing the right thing? Now make a choice. Do you want the woman who is dedicated to you or the woman that you just met and got hooked on? Whatever decision you make, stick to it, with both hands on the throttle.

Remember that your actions and decisions have an effect on the lives of others. I shall bring you back to the main goal of Pick Up, "leave her better than you found her."

You messed up.

@sacredstoryteller
Question 1: Well, I have encountered this situation before. I think that you're handling it well. It's all in the delivery. There's no need to qualify yourself, don't justify why you speak to people easily. A slight Neg can work wonders in this circumstance.

Question 2: It's totally normal to feel the way that you feel. I have felt this way, at times. I think that the key is to really give a crap about what YOU'RE saying. Secondly, I don't blow a bunch of smoke up their asses, I enjoy having a genuine interaction with everyone. I'd rather have one good set then 10 so-so sets.

Hmm, an analogy
Well I'm hungry, so... it's like hamburgers. I would rather go to a bar and get a fresh, thick, juicy burger than go to McDonald's and get a couple grey meat, disgusting cheeseburgers. Sure, they're both hamburgers, but the first is going to be much, much more satisfying.

@A/S/L
haha, I love the word "bird" when referring to women.

Well, it actually sounds like a bunch of fun. I think that she should be pretty receptive to just about anything.

Good luck & have fun!

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Life is a game. Win.

Holy crow, I just completely glazed over two other posts.. woops

@The_Prophet
1- Being alpha is a vibe that you put off. James Bond is one of my favorite alpha male characters. He's fairly soft spoken, a gentleman, but the character always seems to command people's attention. Being alpha, if taken too far, can be pretty douchey, so keep it in check.

2- Don't get caught up in details. Don't overwhelm her, don't do 100%. I think that 50/50 is fair. That should be the ratio for the relationship, in general. You don't have to be 100% at her disposal all the time, it's okay to take your time to respond now and again.

As for saying "I love you," this is something that you should reserve for someone who you truly, romantically, love, in my opinion. Don't try to get out of it by saying "I love all of my friends." Yeah, I've heard guys try to pull that one off...

If you feel it, say it. I've been the first to say it and, it's like anything else, if you say it with the proper, non-needy frame, and not expecting her to say it back, you'll be fine.

3- Dating: This is the fun one. When I offer up an idea and it gets turned down, my response it 100% of the time, "Well, that's my idea, the ball's in your court." Most women are used to guys swooning and being like "let me know what's good for you, we can do whatever you want whenever you want." LAME. Put it back in her lap, she can ask you.

If she says no, I think that you should do something anyway. Even if you don't do anything, you can sit on your couch and watch a movie, but don't let her know that.

When/if she offers a date, if you're into her, accept, if you're not, don't. Don't ditch your boys to go with her (in the beginning at least).

@Lodewijkp
Thanks for the addition.
I will only verbally assail (and make the mods aware of) someone for adding to the thread if they add nonsense, hurtful, hateful, or generally wrong information.

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Life is a game. Win.

Lol. I saw how that could happen.

I'm absorbing your words. maybe a bit more selective, but also just working on myself so I'm always ready for the opportunity, and also thinking of where I go after I've taken the opportunity. Ya, good shit.

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it HAS to look and sound real.

Always glad to help!

Anyone need anything? The Saints won the Super Bowl, I'm happy...

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Life is a game. Win.

Okay Medic, here's the deal (bit of a long read though)

There's this 1 HB (I know, don't shoot me down yet ) I've liked for about 3 months. We've kissed a few times and got along pretty well, but then she discovered her ex-bf will come back from his trip around the world come June. Now she's totally into him again. So I froze her out for a bit and stuff, but got weak and told her my feelings about her a few days ago (got sort of a LJBF kinda response).
Normally, I would just go out sarging and stuff, but it doesn't work for me this time. That means, I've kissed 20 really nice girls since this HB and the feelings stay the same. The main problem would be that I see her almost everyday at school and I'm starting to get uncomfortable around her.

What should I do? Go for it and try to break this other chap (if so, how?) or just try to block it out and go out sarging?

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A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them.

John C. Maxwell

I think that you already know what my response is going to be...

You've let her know how you feel, you've laid it all out on the line. She either respects it or she doesn't. Either way, that's her problem now.

If she's not willing to put the effort into you, she's not worth your time. Just accept it for what it is. You have to be rational about the whole thing, you can be cordial. Don't be rude or douchey.

You have to see her on a regular basis, don't get into conversations with her, if for some reason you do, keep it brief and to the point.

Get out there and start talking to a bunch of other chicks again, you WILL get over her.

Best of luck!

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Life is a game. Win.

Sorta saw that one coming.

Figured it out by myself actually, as I said kissed a bunch of girls since but doesn't help me yet. Ah, well, things will work out eventually.

Just had a glimmer of hope that maybe there was a way to 'eliminate' boyfriends.

Thanks for the reality input though!

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A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them.

John C. Maxwell

I love foreign chicks. Swiss, brazilian, french mm mm good. But theres one slight problem here... They don't really understand what you're talking about. I mean, they kinda pretend to, but I can tell they don't really. its hard to really express anything. So, how can you interact without language? I've been thinking more, take them places show them things and share an experience, but I don't know. Ultimately any relationship I've had with a foreign chick always ends weirdly.. but how can you do it?


btw I used your "Well thats my idea, balls in your court" Cool man