i've decided to make a thread where you can ask me about relationships.
little background info about me :
at relationships:
1. i never had a normal relationship, all of my GF's had problems like : drug addiction, diseases ( even cancer), borderline/biplolairity, preganancy, immature and maturity and so forth.
2. i had 2 good healthy relationships but i sabotaged them by behaving in a certain way.
3. i have made all the mistakes and done all idiot like shit, i learned from all my mistakes and mistakes from others.
talking more about what i know or who i really am isn't important , you probably got a problem and that needs attention.

tip 1. Don't text certain facts like '' she calls me 20 times in a week'' because it doesn't matter if she calls you 10 times or 20 times.
tip 2. Don't make uber-long stories.. keep it short and write the most important facts or causes.
tip 3. Don't thank me by saying '' oh you're so good thanks bro'' because your thanks won't make a difference to me and you. instead of thanking me you should try to solve your problem, and changing/improving your inner game.
tip 4. don't ask me personal questions like how many Gf's i've had because that is not important.

forum : This is a relationship section so don't post about K-closing or that kind of stuff. If you had a previous relationship and you want to talk about that is allowed as well, you don't have to be in a relationship to talk about relationships.

me replying: i give my opinions and reality bitch slaps BUT don't take my word for granted, im not solving your problem but im inspiring you to solve your problem. don't always expect me to write long replies, short and clear answers are often the best answers, but if your problem is challenging i will consider writing very long replies.
These are not rules but merely tips to avoid confusion...
challenge me with your problems !

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

Lodewijkp,I got 1 for you.

My gf prematurely walks away from me while talking.

Then I'd say,"Hey,Im not done,why walk away"?

Gf:I thought you were saying bye.

Does that signal lack of respect for me or just lack of manners on her part?

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

k-loc

It depends what you were talking about, the subject could be sensitive on her part but less important to you.
She could be uncomfortable with the conversation and at that moment she didn't want to talk about it.
When someone performs an act of disrespect(immature) it's always a lack of manners - : i can be angry but do i allow myself to be angry ? im mature but do i allow myself to be mature ? She doesn't allow herself to act grown up because something blocks her from doing that....

there could be 20 reasons why she's acting this way, but one fact is certain ; it's not an respectfull thing to do ( walking away like that ), it's her way of avoiding certain topics.
You have the right to communicate your preferences ( values ), even if you tell her the truth ( you don't like her walking away like that ) she could get into conflict with you because you oppose your reality/value set to hers.
option 1 : If you have a solid relationship you could talk about this issue but don't do it from a forcing frame.

option 2 : if she's really avoiding certain topics she will not agree with your opinion , imitate her behaviour and walk away - Show her how anoying it could be. Do it from a '' i want to learn you something'' mindset and not a revenge or i want more power in relationship mindset.
Imitating would make certain behaviour socially acceptable so don't do it too often.
Don't allow her behaviour constantly because then you are approving her behaviour, don't be the angry parent BUT be the guy with high value!

a total lack of respect is different .... she would probably ingnore you or insult you and hook up with other guys.

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

Ok Lode I got one for you..

whenever i compliment my girlfriend on anything physical, telling her shes beautiful, hot, sexy, anything like that she tells me to stop..i think its insecurity because she always says whatever i say isnt true..how should i react to this? should i continue to compliment her anyway?

Like the advice. Im new to LTR eventhough I've been with her a year.

I actually had chosed option 1 and was rough about it.

Another 1.

Friday gone,the same gf of mines asked me if she could go out(to a bar)with her female co-workers.

After brain storming,I told her sure but be good.

If I say no,would that means Im insecure?

Or should I say no or yes to her going again if she suggests?

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

I realize that this is Lodewijkp's thread, but before answering the question, what is the reason for you wanting to say no?

Often.. when you tell your GF the truth she (often)doesn't believe you. That's because a womans reality is based on social conditioning. Other people could tell her she isn't hot or some guys negged her some time ago - almost all woman draw their inner game from external factors. that is the reason you must please a woman or she tells you it becomes boring because she can't draw the inner pleasure from herself like most guys do.
my former GF was very hot and most people will rate her HB15 ( i hate rating system) however she was very insecure about her tits BUT she didn't had small tits at all. all her GFs had massive tits and she just felt like she had the smallest. she let her reality build around external factors which were based on limting beliefs

therefore over the years it has become part of her reality and you can't undo that in a few days or with a few compliments.
advice: just say it's your opinion... she says it isn't ''true'' your opinion is your opinion and you can't say this is the ''truth'' it's just your opinion. she thinks according to this social conditioning i described above.
whenever you give her a compliment you say that it's your opinion and that it turns you on, you can even tell her that some guys won't find her attractive BUT YOU FIND her attractive. ( some guys like fat chicks, some guys like skinny chicks and some guys like chicks who snort coke).

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

k-loc

whenever you've agreed you can't switch it back, because if you do you are giving her the thought you are incongruent ( in relationship ).
whenever you have a GF you have stick with what you've promised, it's a trust thing and woman find it very important.
Therefore if you say no she thinks you don't trust her enough...
If you don't want her to go out next time don't say no... just say you prefer her not to.

I never say yes or no ... if my GF wants to cheat and she asks me if she can, of course i say no and put my foot down - but in reality she still can cheat.
therefore i always say '' i prefer '' keep it an opinion and not a order ( with small topics)
lastwolf has a good question ... why do you want to say no ?

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

Great answer Lodewijkp.

I usually don't say yes or no neither.

To answer Wolf's question(sorry Lodwijkp for doing this on your thread).

What would make me say no? the thought of her flirtin with other guys to possibly getting peer-pressured into cheating by her girlfriends.

Lodewijkp,you can add to that.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

k-loc

it is very true social pressure will make people do things they normally wouldn't do. But she can cheat whenever she want to, even if you totally disagree... I also guarantee she will flirt with other guys because of the social pressure, when she's asking you '' if she can go out with friends'' she's also asking permission to flirt with other guys.

Why would she ask it in the first place... right ?

flirting doesn't mean she will cheat, you must trust her - i know your fears but those fears are only bad expectations. If she cheats then she isn't worth it... if she cheats then she is a ignorant dumb bitch - you could get better. it's all a test, a relationship test.
il bet your GF flirts when getting groceries... il bet she flirts on work as well, it's just social communication woman are used to - it makes them feel comfortable in an enviroment where they don't feel comfortable at all.

you need to get these thoughts about her cheating out of your mind, because she could already have cheated 2 days ago... who knows ?
maybe she is thinking the same thing about you when you're going out and therefore this kind of fear is commonly a shared one.
When you keep fears like this in the back of your mind you will sub-communicate this unconciously into your relationship - it's a serious drawback. it's a primitve caveman thought : in stone age times when people left a social circle they could compromise the social circel, that is why we still have some overprotective thoughts. In the stone age rape murder were common .. but we don't live in the stone age anymore but our brains still have some instinctive patterns.

Solutions: realizing you got nothing to worry about.

1. go out with her
2. meet her friends and go out with them - get value in the social circle.

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

Keeping it short and simple.

I have just got into a relationship, first one for about 5years. I am just turning 18.

Just want your opinion on how I can keep things interesting, keep her intrigued how to ensure I dominate the relationship(in moderation)

peace.

Tips on keeping the girl? Having a healthy relationship? Dos/Donts?

Giving up the idea of dominating the relationship, because when you fixate on one idea you become unaware of the enviroment your in. if im walking outside enjoying nature but my mind is wandering about what i should do in the future - i can't enjoy nature at all.
The best thing to do is to give her a interesting boyfriend, but how do we do that ?

Meaning you have to invest in yourself as well, step outside your comfort zone and do things that will change your way of thinking in a positive way. Go out sarging and Breed confidence, the more you are ( this can only determined by you and not by others) the more you can give , thus have alot to give to this relationship. MY personal favorite things to develop myself are reading books about philosofy, buddhism, sarging, sports, walking in nature - it's not only doing but also being aware and thinking about them thus experiencing them.

i personally believe every relationship is different and all those rules don't apply to every relationship. What i do know is that your own rules sub-conciously applies into the relationship without realizing it.
Find your best-self so you can give your best-self to your Gilfriend, you are only 18 so you have alot to experience / find out. Go live life and be confident.

as long you keep investing in a strong personality you will dominate the relationship automatically.
peace

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

good question and most people ask it, however it can be messy if you apply to a set of rules.

Some rules don't apply in some relationships because every relationship is different - both 2 persons are different.
some dos could turn out bad and some donts could turn out well , it's a total paradox, You can only decide who you are and only your rules can be applied to the relationship.

Social conditioning.... Dr.Phil ( he's good guy tho ) often come up with these rules about relationship HOWEVER dr.phil is conditioning/manipulating these people to believe in these values. The couples are at his show because they have problems and phil make them believe certain values + social pressure of being on television only adds to this manipulation ( he has good intentions tho ). Some of dr.phils values also utterly destroyed some relationships.
If the dude lived up to these values but his girl didn't then it won't help anyway because one is investing more ( giving more ) than the other.

no one can teach you how to treat relationships, it's like swimming - you have to drown a few times before you can swim. Every relationship has a different swimming pool ; some with warm water, some with cold , some are stratched out, some doesn't even contain water. Be flexible and be like water - don't resist it. someone who only experienced swimming in warm water will recommend the same values/rules to someone who will swim in cold water. in warm water you can stay in for a long time - cold water ( or freezing) you cannot , some guys even swim in pools without water.

My personal rules : balance ... balance in everything - when balance gets interrupted everything turns corrupted. Naure was balanced for the last million of years ( ecosystem) even the predator on the top has a treath ; disease. thus everything is balanced. According to my opnion the concept of balanced Ecosystems ( balance of nature ) is one of the most succesfull concepts ever - nature existed for millions of years and never failed ( in balance).
It's like the eastern philosophy ''ying-yang''.
you shouldn't be investing more than your GF

so at number 1. : balance or at least trying to get balance.

my next personal favorite rule : Keep developing yourself, Your GF loves YOU and with you i mean YOU. So you have to keep investing in yourself because the best gift you can give to your GF is a Boyfriend who is in touch with himself. A BF who is the ruler of his own life.
buddhist concepts are good sources to get some understanding about this, but the RSD blueprint decoded also lay the emphasis on these concepts.
One value which you should apply to this rule is Looking at yourself first, when you read a book don't look how it could be applied into a relationship but first look how you should apply it on yourself.

Delusions :
some guys only have a 2 months relationship but act like they have a serious relationship. This is ok as long your GF thinks the same - but often this is not the case. Thus you are investing more, giving yourself up in the process and giving up balance.
Treat the relationship like it's expandable until you reach month 4 or month 6, this doesn't mean you should be picking up other girls and treat your GF like shit.

1. balance
2. keep developing yourself(inner game), you are the most important person in the relationship.
3. keep expectations down, don't expect anything

peace

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

if someone got some good tips, some constructive critisism- feel free to reply. i don't own internet and i don't own the forum.

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526