I'll try to keep this concise.

Humans have a way of over complicating things. Take an algebraic equation and try to explain it to a six year old, and probably 100% of the time he won't understand it. Why? Ironically it's a little more complicated than "he hasn't learned it yet" (let's hope I'm not over complicating, after all I am human). The six year old's brain is going ape shit trying to figure out this equation, making all sorts of assumptions and doubts and conclusions that are completely on a whim. In other words, the six year old is over complicating the equation, when the answer to almost all algebraic equations follows a simple formula that can be executed step by step. Simplifying the explanation and simplifying the approach yields tremendous results - explain these simple steps to a six year old child and his chances of understanding the equation will skyrocket. Simplification is a virtue.

Now there is no doubt in my mind that the whole universe of pick up is an extremely over complicated place. Every time I think about pick up I get a headache because of all the strings attached - It's like this huge mixed up spider web. There are thousands of theories out there about pick up, millions of little things to remember when picking up a girl, how could one possibly render all of them in a single approach?

For the sake of being concise I digress, but this is my point: people over complicate pick up. Our minds are wired in a way that we tend to dramatize things, we grasp concepts and create mental doppelgangers and holograms that attach these concepts to other concepts, creating this huge complicated web that we get entirely lost in. I know I do this a lot and it has really faltered my learning process; I think it's a pretty common problem though...

"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." - Hamlet

This Hamlet quote sums up the way our minds create illusions that we perceive as reality. Maybe I am getting too deep here, but I believe that a lot of our perception of all of the different theories of pick up and approaches and things to remember are overly complicated by our mind. It is really a lot simpler than we make it seem.

I'm rambling, so let's get to this fuck it approach:

-----THE FUCK IT APPROACH------

You know the fuck it attitude. You say it when you really just don't give a shit what happens anymore.

You spend hours working on something that just isn't working and it just doesn't seem worth it anymore: Fuck it.

You try to fix your relationship with your girlfriend but she is still pissed at you and there's no way your getting back together: Fuck it.

You've got exams coming up in the next couple days and you haven't yet studied: Fuck it.

It's a pretty universal feeling. But for most PUAs when it comes to picking up girls, this attitude vanishes. Suddenly there is this one thing that can never be fucked, you can't just 'fuck it', (both literally and for the sake of my argument). This is important. This is complicated. This is going to take work.

To simplify, the fuck it attitude is useful around all women as it gives you a sense of value. You have all read about the importance of being 'nonchalant' and 'relaxed' around women, like you really don't care if they like you or not. This is, in essence, the fuck it approach. It's as if you really don't care what they think.

Imagine that! You don't care what they think! You're going to go out and have a good time,
"Fuck it, life is short and I'm going to enjoy it."
I'm going to put out a good vibe and if anyone fucks with my reverberations, fuck it, their loss, cause I'm having fun and they're not.

Basically, fuck what everyone thinks of you. Fuck how you are perceived. Fuck whether or not the HB10 digs you, or if you are going to get a kiss close or a number.

How about you get chewed up and spit out and left embarrassed and harassed by a group of HB10s? Fuck them, man. They're fucking with your swagger and you don't swing that way!

In the end, we are all winners and we are all losers. We are all in this game of life. Fuck it and have some fun.

Sharplin out.

_________________
-Sharplin
My journal:
sharplins-journal-vt84603.html?highlight=

I agree with your post, there's no better feeling than "fuck it" and just do whatever you want to do and don't give a damn about anything. It's a great mindset when you go out, BUT... only when you are in the right place. Some people have got responsibilities, a job for example, and they can't deal with everything by having the "fuck it" approach. You can't walk around with that "fuck it" feeling 24/7, like Hank Moody does (in Californication). Have it at the right place, at the right time.

Well said and good point. If you have a job and you've got an important meeting to go to, or a report due soon, or paperwork or something; you definitely can't fuck that.

I was referring purely to social situations, but it is an important distinction to make.

_________________
-Sharplin
My journal:
sharplins-journal-vt84603.html?highlight=

This whole "fuck it" concept...

When you want something in this life, an important thing you must do in order to obtain it is having an adecuate thinking process about it.

Lets say that young Usain Bolt wants to be an athlete. What if he starts thinking on all the variables involved on running, and on how he must control them in order to win? He's going to get worried, stressed, and he will snap after a few weeks of training.

Sometimes, the things that really matter have to matter the least in your mind.

I think the phrase "fuck it" inadequate. You are not dismissing the goal. You are just reducing its psycological impact to a digestable integer.

_________________
"[Cool is] a heavily manipulative corporate ethos. ”
Kalle Lasn

"Motherfuckers best belive in....That you are fucking with the best" - 3oh!3

Teasing is a battle plan for what Shakespeare called “the merry war.”

Allow me to disagree.

Yes, the Fuck it approach can work wonders in some situations.

However there is nothing wrong in caring about stuff.

I think that PUAs try to hide behind this attitude to avoid unpleasant situations. If something goes wrog or is difficult they go away and go for something easier. Thats a way to deal with it but you never challenge yourself.

My approach... I go for what I want without feeling any shame. I try and win, I try and fail. The only attitude I have is: If it is important I care and if its not I dont. You have to be able to accept defeat without being destroyed by it.

I am a realist. I believe that being honest with yourself is painful but the best way to learn fast.

You guys both bring up great points.

If no one gave a shit about anything and said fuck it to any situation, the world would be far too mellow. There would be no passion. There would be no success, on a grand scale anyway. The world would be a far less interesting place...

So yes. I agree with you.

And Ezo, that's a pretty cool philosophy to live by: Care about what is important and don't care about what isn't important. I agree with that too.

I don't wanna come off as a pushover who just agrees with every concept, but I believe that the 'fuck it' theory can coincide with these theories.

When applied in the right context. I didn't really convey my meaning well enough in the original post: the Fuck It approach works only in certain situations, particularly pertaining to a social interaction. There might be other fallbacks to the theory but the point is this:

Fuck all the shit that is holding you back. I give examples like rejection, fear, intrinsic thought, fear of how others perceive you (and to bring it beyond pickup you could add other challenges in career or life).

You've gotta grasp the important stuff and hold it close, and fuck everything else. That's the fuck it approach.

_________________
-Sharplin
My journal:
sharplins-journal-vt84603.html?highlight=

The fuck it approach is what I have been trying to develop myself over the last week or so. Before I used to care about what people thought of me but now I generally dont care at all.

Last night at a bar I was dancing myself (god forbid!) and was having a good time and a girl and her guy friends started saying stuff and laughing. I just ignored it and I seen how even one of the guys looked so insecure when he was trying to laugh as if he wasnt comfortable in himself. I continued dancing and the set started to change as they realised their opinion meant shit to me and when my friends came back I was able to say "BYEE" in a really loud voice. The guys started to look at me strangely but the girl seemed into it by replying in the same high energy voice.

Dont change for no one. I have started reading Fountainhead by Ayn Rand which is an awesome book about this. Im only about 200 pages and already feeling the difference.

Good topic.

Legend! I need to start doing more stuff like that, I have this sort of high status, introverted, tough guy image which Im trying to add more fun to. You know what "Fuck it" lol im gonna try this.

FUCK IT !

FUCK THE FUCK IT ... FUCK THAT !

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

Damn you should write a book on that topic!

Exactly! Interaction with the Boss at work = Very Important
Social Intercation with HB at the bar= Not Important

As a PUA though you obviosuly do care about the HB at the bar, you want her to be attracted to you and you want the progress, so it is.. "Important".

But its not life threatening, so "Fuck it"

... Or you can just think 'fuck it', which reduces the psychological impact to a digestable integer!

Trixsta: what ever works for you bro.

_________________
"[Cool is] a heavily manipulative corporate ethos. ”
Kalle Lasn

"Motherfuckers best belive in....That you are fucking with the best" - 3oh!3

Teasing is a battle plan for what Shakespeare called “the merry war.”

At the same time, having a little bit of "Fuck it" in your system when dealing with your boss goes a long way. I'm obviously not saying to fuck off at work, simply holding onto not being needy and simply doing your work, and not getting used by others. Right? It works wonders for me, now I need to do as sharplin says, and get that same attitude with women. I was actually talking to a HB last night, and she told me that when she is interested in a guy, she adopts the attitude that she's better than he is, and it usually works. After much conversation we both reached the conclusion that a fun relationship is where both people have adopted this attitude.

This is actually an advanced spiritual concept - I'm not even sure the author of the book realises this
http://thefuckitway.com/