I really don't know my problem, perhaps I just don't have anything interesting to say. I was thinking of perhaps having contingency topics that I could go to if needs be.

Anyone else do this sort of thing?

it all depends man i sometimes just look at her and just be non reactive usually shell say something. if not use routines i do some like the cube or something for a time eating thing. then you can use her answers to supplement for stuff in your convo.

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evolve

its cheesy but the 5 lies game is a good one to restart a conversation.

I used to have that problem and the best explanation I got was the reason it was awkward was because I was thinking it was awkward......... and as soon as I thought it was awkward I stated running out of things to say, my anxiety level would shoot up and I would start saying really dumb shit, (one time I stated talking about transvestites...... ya talk about dumb thing to say). Anyways if a silence occurs, don’t think of it as being awkward. Try to put out the vibe that you are comfortable in the silence and if you are really good you might even begin to build some sexual tension. Then calmly think of a new topic and continue the conversation.

I use the awkward silence conversation from Pulp Fiction.

Mia: Don't you hate that?
Vincent: What?
Mia: Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
Vincent: I don't know. That's a good question.
Mia: That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.

Mix it up a little. Give her a DHV smile after, if she starts a conversation go with it. If she's quiet let the silence hang for about 5-10 seconds and suggest a venue change.

I use the awkward silence conversation from Pulp Fiction.

Mia: Don't you hate that?
Vincent: What?
Mia: Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
Vincent: I don't know. That's a good question.
Mia: That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.

Mix it up a little. Give her a DHV smile after, if she starts a conversation go with it. If she's quiet let the silence hang for about 5-10 seconds and suggest a venue change.

I usually act like it's a natural thing, because it is!

If I want it to end I usually go "What are you thinking about?" and work it from there. Either I'll get "Nothing" and joke around that or I actually get a real answer which sparks a conversation.

Another way might be to go "You, know, I just realized something!" and have something prepared for these instances. Preparation is key.

"I just remembered something funny! [Insert history here]"

Hi guys,

having experienced the most dull , closed person on a day2, with lots of uncomfortable silences last night I thought I'd add some opinions and observations.

Firstly it can be used as a qualifier. Does the girl re-start a conversation? If so then it's quite good. Even if she does re-start it what topics does she talk about? My girl last night just asked standard stuff. Really boring.

Secondly, you have no obligation to fill that silence. Why should you? Maybe at the very start yes but after about 10 minutes she should be able to contribute as well!

Last night I was talking and asking questions and I was getting very short or one word answers even to opinion or open type questions. Even talking about her 2 big interests cycling and swimming gained no real replies. Very closed. I venue changed and managed to get in some kino while leading her to see a unique sculpture and see Christmas lights. While walking I tried to get her to open up but no luck. I tried one gambit and discussed what crazy things people do. She said she had live New York for a few years so I started by saying she must have seen some crazy things...no response but I persisted and continued that I'd seen some guy meet a girl and they were kissing and making out like crazy in broad public... again no response. I came to the conclusion she was dead inside. It did make me realise that I should have just walked after the first venue. Ejecting or walking away is a sticking point for me.

To the OP Falcone, when I got home I was frustrated for several reasons. Firstly I should have left quicker than I did. But secondly I realised I get frustrated and irritated too much when girls are not responsive. In short I was reacting because she was not reacting! Look at that possibility Falcone. I should have asked some cool but direct questions in the first bit. Maybe I should have simply stated that some people feel uncomfortable to open up with strangers. Maybe I should have just said to her that I didn't think it was working and just left

probably the best thread ive ever read. Helped me out heaps.
http://www.theattractionforums.com/best ... lines.html

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THE YAGERMEISTER!!!

This is a problem everyone faces. For the most part, I've learned to just keep asking questions; and when silence does occur it's you who makes it awkward not her. It's going to happen eventually so why not try to build something out of it. Give her your best "fuck me" look. Stare into her eyes like you're trying to read her soul, and if she makes a face call her out on it. Maybe throw in a "wow stare much?" or a "I know I'm pretty but honestly, calm down" works almost every time lol. Eventually though you'll be able to read when this is coming and be able to think of something to alleviate the situation. All things in time right?

Each to his own, but from now if the conversation stalls I'm going to use it to qualify them. If they restart then good if not then move on.

I'd just start talking about how people perceive silences to be awkward when in conversation with a new acquaintance versus how comfortable the silence is with others. At the same time I'd be careful of sounding like the girl and I were not close.

AAHHAH

Anyway, that what DCash posted was golden.

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There is NO secret ingredient. Theres just you.

I agree completely. What has worked for me in the past is being quiet and doing your own thing, until she starts a topic herself. DONT listen to your ipod or read a book or something that makes her think she would be intruding if she spoke to you. just look out the window or watch other people, or doodle in a notebook or any number of environmental things. Keep your mind off of her----if you're not thinking about her, time will fly faster, and before you know it she'll be asking you why you're so quiet. Then you can jump into a routine.

"...stop talking, i can't even hear myself thing"

i say it in a serious tone but then smile afterwards, then transition

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Slept On Rappers
http://hiphoprising.blogspot.com