It doesn't pay to be nice. Let me be more specific-it doesn't pay to be nice to a woman you're trying to court(the target).

But,that's common knowledge in the seduction communty so all of us should already know that.

Fellaz,grab something to munch on while you read 'cause this' a lengthy post.

Ok,chec it out. Im going to dig deep into my AFC files(years ago)and tell a little story that I later learned to puzzling.

It was a Valentine(a week before) so I figure to do something really special for an HB7 whom I was trying to game. Note-the gesture was suppose to show her how much I was into her and wanted her.

So,I decided to buy her some roses,a cue teddy bear,box of chocolate,a love letter and a love poem. when I was gathering those gifts,I said to myself,"I cannot lose with her".

FYI:I didnt even have her # and I'd only chatted her up few times prior.

Ok,since I knew where this girl lived[thinking about it now-I was I stalker mode and didn't see it-lol),I decided to surprise her at her door and presented her the gift paccage(Lol).

I knocked at her door and startled her with the gifts. I was too shy to stay while she went through them so I left immediately(lol). As I walked away I said,"Ok,Im in now".

Note:we'd spoken prior about jerks and guys who just wanted to fuck and bounce and how much she hates those guys.

2 days had elapsed without her getting to me[I wrote my #'s-(LAN & mobile) on the letter,poem & card so she couldn't missed it].Since she didnt call in 2 days,I decided to pay her an unannounced visit.

As I approached her gate,I noticed 2 figures on the porch embracing an kissing. I hid behind some bushes[stalker mode again-lol]and watch as she passionately kissed....a fucking known womanizing/jerk/con man/bad boy!!!! This guy was known in the neighborhood as a frigging rake,and this chic whom I' admired and fantasized about many nights was slobbing him down!!!!

[Fast Forward]I confronted her days after and put her on the spot as to why him-the known bad boy? After she'd told me that she hates those types. She eventually told me that she wasnt looking for a relationship(with me) and she gave me bacc the gifts!!! I was crushed.

Funny thing is,I had a book called"The art of seduction" written by something Green(cant remember his first name)-I had the book for years but never read it(lol).

Now as I look bacc(about 6 years ago)I have to laugh as to the psychology that was taking place on both ends. It really doesn't pay to be romantic & nice to an OYD(object of our desire),especially when she hasn't reciprocate any of your feelings.

That's it guys;sorry for the long ass post.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
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Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
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I was the same with a girl I know some time ago, except I didn't get her any gifts. Looking back now, I realise that I was too nice. Even my friends said I was obsessed with her, which isn't true at all.

Thanks for sharing!



Phoenix - "Women want sex as much as men, they're just generally less forward about it."

K-Loc good post.

I'm sure many of us found ourselves in that boat.

The rake doesn't care either way, takes what they can get and moves onto the next target. If the girl was looking for a hook-up, those are the best guys to target since they are so detached. BUT not many girls want to be in a relationship with a rake eventually.

So, back to the 'Nice guy finishes last'... You have to be a 'Man' and know when to be 'Nice'... And a Man isn't an AFC or stalker for that matter.

If a girls says 'oh that is so nice of you', that puts you in the 'friend zone' but if she comes up to you and gives you a big hug, then you are more than likely NOT in the 'friend zone' so start pursuing, but with caution.

When you are in a relationship, its ok to buy them gifts but not all the time and not in such big quantities that it overwhelms them. Everything has to be paced and paced just right.

Remember attraction is the ladies choice, not yours. So if you don't get those IOIs you are much better off moving on than spending your time, and money, on something that may never transpire.

And yea, it can tear you up inside seeing someone you have the hots for kissing someone you despise. Hell, I normally will not even pursue a girl if she has been with someone I despise.

Best,

J-Dub

P.S. Its better to be the predator and not the prey.

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J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

What you said is somewhat true.. but what you did is wayyyy beyond being nice... its being needy.. there's a major difference..

Being nice is just being a good hearted considerate guy.. Just being a good friend...
If you were a nice guy that wasn't needy she would've went for you.. you can still be a nice guy and neg and sometimes even freeze out girls when they want it..

Giving a girl flowers that your not officially dating is a weak, creepy move, even in an AFC's world...

Nice guys finish first... Needy guys finish last..

nice post, no guy can say that hasn't happened to them.
how did you rebound from that experience? did you ever fall into that scenario and handle it differently?

You really don't 'rebound' from that experience. It is what it is, you learn to not put yourself in that position again.

Best medicine is having lots of girls to talk to and, its sad to say, but sometimes you really do need to detach yourself from your feelings. You learn to not to get too emotionally involved with a woman until you are in a 'serious' relationship.

But you still need to Man-Up no matter what situation you are in, relationship or not.

Its a tough school of life.

Best,

J-Dub

_________________
J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

Its funny.. now that i remember.. i once did the same thing to a girl.. THAT ALREADY HAD A BOYFRIEND>. she continued to ignore me, even after she broke up wth him and she thought i was a creep. she even said it to my face.

Funny enough 8 months after her break up, she started always texting me and wanting to hang out. she'd see me at parties and start approaching me and giving me the eye.. but i wasn't about it, as i really did not want anything to do with her anymore..

It really shows you how girls are actually more out of touch with themselves than guys.. They never know what they want at the time so never take their actions/words seriously.. Nothing kills them more than a guy that was all about them but then suddenly loses interest...

i bet if you see that girl again and game her she'll be all about you... not saying its worth the chase though..

Well Lorini30, a situation like that had never reoccured because I'd stumbled across the seduction community on the net;plus I finally read the art of seduction by Robert Greene wich I had for years but never read it.

But to be honest,situations like mines has happened to all of us. It happened to be like 9 times in my lifetime(AFC days).

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

Lorini30,Loyal Nicks Fan,J-Dub & others;thanks for giving yall views on the post dealing with a very common AFC issue. Since I represent NYC(the Bronx),I have to give special recognition to Loyal Knicks Fan(lol).

Further note,I forgot which one of yall made a great point that its not a bad idea to present gifts to your gf,but damn sure not to an OYD or a chicc you're infatuated with.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

You're preaching to the choir on this topic. Most guys have probably gone through similar experiences with women we desire. I know I have.

For years, I was naive enough to think that if were excessively nice to women, then it would make me unique and have an advantage over the others. Whenever a woman would say, "You are so sweet. I can't believe you are single," I was actually encouraged by that and it would give me hope. But now I know that when they say that, it is basically BS.

It would really enrage me when I saw attractive women with guys who were total douchebags. In the eyes of women, these guys could do no wrong. That just added insult to injury.

After years of pondering this, I came to realize that I was beyond nice. And it made me realize that I was the true douchebag. I came to realize that I was being this way simply because I was needy and had very low confidence. And we all know what a turn off that is to women. I decided that I could be a decent guy and still be confident.

In fact, I would like to recommend a book that gave me perspective on being too nice. The book is titled, "No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Dr. Robert A. Glover. He coined the term "Nice Guy Syndrome." The book gives an indept analysis about he psychological make-up of a "Nice Guy." Some of what Dr. Glover says is hard hitting, but a necessary evil if you want to get over having "Nice Guy Syndrome."

I am posting this because I hope others could benefit from this and to save them years of frustration. The book is great and it helped me a great deal when I got into the game.

By the way, loyalknicksfan said it best:

"Nice guys finish first... Needy guys finish last.."