whats up bro! heres my input
i think you are doing everything good by keeping a good frame, and not letting her dominate you in person. however letting her to carry you around by telling you he doesnt want you to be like her ex-bf to me is B.S. Shes treating you like a puppy if you behave good you gonna get a treat (in the end is still her decision)
What i think you should do is somehow to comunnicate her that you are not gonna be around for long waiting for her wanna take things further you dont have to prove yourself to anyone and you are a man and shes out there always looking to see if you do something wrong. Because you are a man you have desires and plans which you are postponing because of her and her insecurities about you. Dont do this in a mean way you dont have to hurt her but you gotta keep her on her toes, your not gonna let someone waste your time.

hope it helps