Don't know if this information has been posted before but here it goes.

Below is an article I read about how to get out of the friend zone, the places that so many of us find ourselves trapped in. The link is below:

http://www.sosuave.com/articles/escaping.htm

Highlighted items in quotes:
Please feel free to add your comments or any experiences you have had to help get yourself out of the infamous 'Friend Zone'.

Cheers,

J-Dub

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J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

I wrote a lengthy answer but it wasn't accepted by the forum and I try again with a summary.
I am not at all sure this would be helpfull for you but I have a hunch it may.

Along with desire comes hate and the experience of aggression. Difficulty to feel hate toward the ones you desire and the inability to "contain" aggressive feelings makes it impossible to have hot sex. This is according to the book / audiobook Mating in captivity. Feeling hatred and aggression along with desire for the person may help in avoiding friendship.

Meeting and having sex with the friends friends may be a possibility. And keep her as a friend only. Read in another book.

In the first mentioned audiobook the author argues that democracy and desire don't go along. Equality destroys hot sex, she says, and small cruelties are erotic. Getting and keeping in contact with such themes in your personality and not trying to hide this when meeting with women may image you primarily as a sex object in their minds I guess.

This book and the book Can love last (which also is about these issues) also touches on the necessity to objectify women in order to have hot sex.

I did not wish to write this with an edge but being denied by the forum in the last effort did make me feel a little edgy.

Benefit,

I had the same issues until I wrote at least 5 responses/forum topics, per the being denied bit.

What you said already makes a lot of sense. Will have to follow up with the reading material you mentioned. Can never hurt.

Cheers!

J-Dub

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J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

Hey J-Dub,

Until I have written 5 entries I will copy the text before I post it so I have a chance to adjust it.

Wanna say that the author says that democracy and equality in the erotic area destroys eroticism, but she does not at all suggest that acting "democratic" and with "equality" outside the erotic domain would diminish eroticism when being in erotic situations.

Remembered, in the book Self-coaching the author writes in the beginning of the book that it is vital for having a fullfilling life to risk feeling what you feel. He writes something like "when you feel what you feel, you will find out if your a monster that will pester the world or you find out that you are a person capable of true intimacy". He argues that knowing this is important.

Very relating to what you wrote is that in the book Mating in captivity the author argues that a major hinder to hot sex in relationships is to be too emotionally close. She argues that eroticism demands emotional distance between the two persons. I'm not sure I rembember but perhaps she suggests some ways for a couple to create more of that distance.

Cheers!

I agree with J-dub, it makes a lot of sense! I going to have to use your tips with a friend of mine that I'm stunk in the fz with.

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As a monarch is one that surpasses others in power, I surpass others in the field.

The Friend Zone is deadly. Hopefully I can use this. I started using jealousy and a lack of dependency already on my own figuring it was the only way to get out of The Zone.

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Stop talking to her.

Cut back to very limited communication.

Be busy when you're not busy and tell her you cant be around.

After 3 months she will want you, or sooner. I know from experience. But I wrecked it after the 3 months lol.

Oh yeah, flirt and be sexual

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-- Jay --