Hey

I'm pretty baffled.

Last night I was on a christmas night out in town with my team at work and bumped in to some friends from another department and chipped off with them for a change of venue, not to mention to get away from an ex who had tagged along. Now, I was totally not in player mode last night and just out to have a bit of fun, aside from the fact of being pretty plastered and my having rubbish game when I'm drunk.
Anyhow, with the group I peeled off with was an HB8.
When we arrived at the next bar the HB8 got the drinks in while I put our jackets in the cloakroom, telling her I would look after her cloakroom ticket - a good lock in, now deciding to take a pissed punt on her.
We spent alot of the evening shooting the shit with everything from summer days out to work (as we work for the same company). I'm really in to rock climbing and we talked about how we were going to go out climbing sometime at a local indoor wall, she's not climbed before so wanted to start in a controlled environment.
Later on in the night a friend of her's decided to tell me that the HB8 was not interested in me and she had (rightly) got the idea I was hitting on her. I immediately regressed in to AFC mode and backed down saying that I was not interested, I then thought screw it, left the group and spent the rest of the evening with some other friends.

Should I have backed down saying to her mate I was not interested - it release a bit of pressure off the situation after all.

Further to all this, I logged on to facebook this morning and the HB8 (who is not currently a facebook friend) had sent me an email asking when we're going rock climbing.

I spoke to a mate today who is very much AFC and seems to think the cockblock was due to the HB8 asking her friend to find out what my true intentions were as she wanted to keep up a friendship and go climbing. I'm personally thinking the cockblock had taken it on herself to tell me that for her own reasons - am I wrong?

I'm going to email her back tomorrow when my hangover has worn off a little bit and get something sorted.

Tyree

Don't know if I am too late on this blog.

At any rate, I wouldn't say anything about the cock-blocking. Just stick with your plans and take her to the rock-climbing gym. Act like you don't care whether or not you two go out on a date. Just make sure you two have fun.

She must have some level of interest in you if she already wants to go rock-climbing with you and you two just met.

Another hint, if you know a lot of girls at the rock-climbing gym while you two are there, try talking to them in front of your HB8. That will increase your value in her eyes.

Best,

J-Dub

_________________
J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

hey man

you're not too late by any stretch, and you're on my wavelength - my natural frame would be to appear to not be fazed by any previous negativity and just be cool with the situation and keep it low pressure. it's nice to be reassured thats the right thing to do.

i do know a couple of other girls who go down there, will keep fingers crossed they are going to be there.

i mailed the hb8 yesterday saying i was still up for taking her climbing although she's not come back yet - as they say, if in doubt do nothing so leaving it there until she comes back.

tyree

To be more direct, already set a date that you are going rock-climbing and tell her what day/time. Don't ask her what time works for her. Once you do that, the clock will be ticking and she knows it. If you leave it open ended, she could play cat and mouse with you for a little while.

If she takes the bait, your golden, if not, then move on and act like you don't care. But after that, don't say anything else to her about rock-climbing again, let her bring it up.

And if she does go rock climbing, keep her on 5.6 or 5.7s and not harder, otherwise she may give up too easily,

Cheers,

J-Dub

_________________
J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

hmmm now there is a good plan - cheers dude - will defo be booking her in for a session next time we chat but dont worry i'll be keeping the grade down and let her get in to it.

i'm taking it you're a climber?

Yes, I use to rock-climb back in college but been too busy lately to do any climbing at all.

Remember, you want her to know that YOU are in control of the situation and that you don't care either way if she comes or not. That will make her think to herself 'why doesn't this guy bow down to me like all the other guys...etc', it will work if she is remotely interested, especially if she is a HB8 or above.

A guy that appears that he doesn't care if she hangs with him or not is powerful and tells her that you have other plans that don't involve her, etc.. It then means that she must work to get your approval.

At any rate, good luck.

J-Dub

_________________
J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.