ONLINE DATING QUESTION ~ ASK J SMOOTH!!!



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PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 8:54 pm 
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Me: Damn, Who are you? :)
HB: (Full Name). Get to know me :))
Me: Well(her), Im (me) lol
What would you like me to know about you? :)
Describe yourself in 3 words and cant be anything about your looks:)
HB: Haha uhm. Outgoing,halirous, and blonde. Your turn???


whats next help me please
Shawn1234,

I respect the fact that you are new to the forum and online game and want to do a good job. However, there comes a point of is it me picking up this girl or is it you? If I keep writing lines for you then at some point if she meets you in person or talk to you on a more personal level like text/phone. She is going to notice inconsistencies with my personality, the way I work things, and your personality. Those inconsistencies are "red flags" with girls online and it will spell the end of us talking to her. This is why I put this rule at the beginning of this thread.
Quote:
2. I love to write but I'm not you're personal writer. I will answer all kinds of "How do I..." questions, but please take my responses and put them in your own words. If you do not, when you meet the girl she will notice there are incongruencies very quickly. The way I say things might not work for you, so take the concept and then write your own response please. :)
Let me be the very first to give you permission to fail. The way I learned this stuff and got better was to screw up sometimes. If you do then no big deal we just keep going or talk to someone new. Find the words that work best for you.

Obviously at this point you just need to tell her about yourself, and go from there. She continuing the conversation which is a subtle IOI but a big one. You've got your foot in the door you just have to open it the rest of the way! ;)

~Jon

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 2:59 pm 
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Hey JSmooth, thanks for doing this... ;)

I need some funny and interesting response to Poke on facebook...

So the thing is: one girl, and we are already friends on facebook, and I like her, poked me on facebook, and I want to takt advantage on that and to write some very funny/good response regarding that poke on her Wall...

Any answer regarding that?

TNX!!!

Niko


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 Post subject: asking for help
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 7:13 pm 
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there is an HB 7 that i have seen a few times, and i ran game on her and hooked up with her a bunch of times...but we just made out and nothing else. i've been over to her appartment a few times but her roommates always seem to cockblock so i wanna bring her back to my place

she doesn't have text, so i keep trying to ask her on facebook to chill or come to my dorm or something, but she always seems to be very busy and she claims to never have time.

how can i ask her on facebook to come over??? it seems as if either way i'm screwed, as when i ask a lot for her to come over i seem desperate. but when i don't ask much, she forgets about me...

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:24 pm 
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Hey JSmooth, thanks for doing this... ;)

I need some funny and interesting response to Poke on facebook...

So the thing is: one girl, and we are already friends on facebook, and I like her, poked me on facebook, and I want to takt advantage on that and to write some very funny/good response regarding that poke on her Wall...

Any answer regarding that?

TNX!!!

Niko
Niko,

Whoopie has this awesome little thing he does on Facebook for the poke opener. He'll poke girls and when they poke him back he says, "Did your parents ever teach you its not polite to poke people?" Just as something cocky/funny to get their attention and have a little fun.

Jon

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 12:09 am 
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Dear J smooth,

I have been watching this forum almost since the day it got born.
And I must tell you; I can't possibly think of a way to thank you enough. It was a great journey to read all you responses, and I really like the way you look at things.
Well I'm not that great in online gaming, so I thought i should work on it ;)
Here's the deal:
I opened this HB9.5 and I got a pretty good response.
I used 1 of the great lines: "I was browsing the site and came across you're picture, I just couldn't help asking myself: Is there any more than meets the eye?"
Hmm.. I really want to keep this mesage short so I think I should get to the point lol

She started qualifing at me. She told me that she isn't a bitch who judges people right away. And that she basicly waits a little till she gets to know some1.
Then she wrote; "But I think I'm a nice girl.. Although thats what my friends tell me =p"

So i'm not sure what to do next. Should I DHV her and tell a great story? Or should I reply, neg and play the 3 question game?

Thanks for your advice! And sorry for my bad english ;) Hope you can read it though :)

Phate


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 5:34 am 
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1. Is there a good method for freezing a chick out over the internet? It could be easily misinterpreted as loss of connection or something.

2. Yep, I did this on purpose, I'm sure I broke several basic game rules but this message doesn't smell like complete fail.

"Nice update on the profile. I know, it is a strange compliment but strange people get strange compliments ;). It really stands out. It is not the typical "OMG I love to laugh" "Twilight is like.. OMG Edward!!" "Music=LIFE" "I am a bitch, but really sweet" blah blah blah shallow stereotypical random internet chick nonsense. You'll still get a a lot of the weirdos as well obviously, but you've got a plethora of ways to mess with em. You'll definitely make friends, meet some awesome people with this. Hell, you may even end up one of my friends ;)."

I sent this to an HB7, I've got some comfort with her(helped her make two perverts meet thinking they were gonna see her). The last sentence is ridiculous, I just tossed myself into the LJBF zone, but I am confident I can get out of it.

Anything I could have done different?. or more PUA like?


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 Post subject: Re: asking for help
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 1:32 pm 
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there is an HB 7 that i have seen a few times, and i ran game on her and hooked up with her a bunch of times...but we just made out and nothing else. i've been over to her appartment a few times but her roommates always seem to cockblock so i wanna bring her back to my place

she doesn't have text, so i keep trying to ask her on facebook to chill or come to my dorm or something, but she always seems to be very busy and she claims to never have time.

how can i ask her on facebook to come over??? it seems as if either way i'm screwed, as when i ask a lot for her to come over i seem desperate. but when i don't ask much, she forgets about me...
Gem,

That's a pretty good question. The simple answer is you don't ask her on Facebook to come over. Since you have asked her via Facebook a few times and she has said "No" or saying she can't be there, then let's take another approach. We know she likes you because you can hang out with her in other places right?

The plan should be this. Meet her someplace public like a coffeeshop, bar, mall, pretty much any place you want just so long as its public. This will allow her to relax some. While you are there have fun and do what you normally do. Just add in one thing. Mention something fun to do back at your place like Xbox, Wii, Youtube videos, anything. Notice I said, "Mention" not "Talk about." You want to bring it up for just a few seconds to plant the seed. Then later on in the date work to bounce her to your place as just a continuation of the date to... play Wii, Xbox, watch Youtube videos, movie, whatever.

You initiating a bounce while she's with you to your place will work much better in this situation believe me. I meet girls online all the time. Actually, 3 this past weekend. On each date I met them at some place like a bar, restaurant, etc. then bounced them back to my place chilled for a bit then escalated to well...you can figure it out. ;)

~Jon

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 1:37 pm 
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Dear J smooth,

I have been watching this forum almost since the day it got born.
And I must tell you; I can't possibly think of a way to thank you enough. It was a great journey to read all you responses, and I really like the way you look at things.
Well I'm not that great in online gaming, so I thought i should work on it ;)
Here's the deal:
I opened this HB9.5 and I got a pretty good response.
I used 1 of the great lines: "I was browsing the site and came across you're picture, I just couldn't help asking myself: Is there any more than meets the eye?"
Hmm.. I really want to keep this mesage short so I think I should get to the point lol

She started qualifing at me. She told me that she isn't a bitch who judges people right away. And that she basicly waits a little till she gets to know some1.
Then she wrote; "But I think I'm a nice girl.. Although thats what my friends tell me =p"

So i'm not sure what to do next. Should I DHV her and tell a great story? Or should I reply, neg and play the 3 question game?

Thanks for your advice! And sorry for my bad english ;) Hope you can read it though :)

Phate
Phate,

Thanks for the accolades I am happy to help out and do what I can. Remember flattery will get you everwhere! ;)

Like the opener and it worked well in this case. She qualified back to you so you have "compliance" from her at this point which is very good.

There is not a real reason to neg since we have compliance meaning she thinks she has to qualify herself to you. That would just be like pouring salt on an open wound. :) I think at this point rather than play the 3 question game I would go with a DHV story to let her get to know you some more.

The thing with online game is that DHV stories are king. They allow you to build some attraction subtly with your DHV spikes but it also lets her get to know you through your stories about yourself. I would almost use the 3 questions game later on the phone or via text when you get her number later on. You're on the right path with this one just keep the conversation flowing and get her number after a few more messages.

Have a good one,

~Jon

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 1:56 pm 
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1. Is there a good method for freezing a chick out over the internet? It could be easily misinterpreted as loss of connection or something.

2. Yep, I did this on purpose, I'm sure I broke several basic game rules but this message doesn't smell like complete fail.

"Nice update on the profile. I know, it is a strange compliment but strange people get strange compliments ;). It really stands out. It is not the typical "OMG I love to laugh" "Twilight is like.. OMG Edward!!" "Music=LIFE" "I am a bitch, but really sweet" blah blah blah shallow stereotypical random internet chick nonsense. You'll still get a a lot of the weirdos as well obviously, but you've got a plethora of ways to mess with em. You'll definitely make friends, meet some awesome people with this. Hell, you may even end up one of my friends ;)."

I sent this to an HB7, I've got some comfort with her(helped her make two perverts meet thinking they were gonna see her). The last sentence is ridiculous, I just tossed myself into the LJBF zone, but I am confident I can get out of it.

Anything I could have done different?. or more PUA like?
LaVitae'Breve,

Hey thanks for posting I'll try to answer you questions the best I can here.
Quote:
1. Is there a good method for freezing a chick out over the internet? It could be easily misinterpreted as loss of connection or something.
Not really, if you freeze out over the Internet she's going to move on. These chicks get lots of messages online from guys so if you're not around then she'll move on to someone else who is interested. Unfortunately, with the Internet in most cases we don't have enough rapport built really for this to work well.
Quote:
2. Yep, I did this on purpose, I'm sure I broke several basic game rules but this message doesn't smell like complete fail.

"Nice update on the profile. I know, it is a strange compliment but strange people get strange compliments ;). It really stands out. It is not the typical "OMG I love to laugh" "Twilight is like.. OMG Edward!!" "Music=LIFE" "I am a bitch, but really sweet" blah blah blah shallow stereotypical random internet chick nonsense. You'll still get a a lot of the weirdos as well obviously, but you've got a plethora of ways to mess with em. You'll definitely make friends, meet some awesome people with this. Hell, you may even end up one of my friends ;)."

I sent this to an HB7, I've got some comfort with her(helped her make two perverts meet thinking they were gonna see her). The last sentence is ridiculous, I just tossed myself into the LJBF zone, but I am confident I can get out of it.

Anything I could have done different?. or more PUA like?
Yes, there are hundreds of things that you could have done differently. The thing of it is what is congruent with who you are, and the way you talk. If this message is more you, and as long as it gets you results then it really doesn't matter what I think. Results are more important that what I personally think. Having said that I'll try to give you some feedback from my perspective.
Quote:
Nice update on the profile. I know, it is a strange compliment but strange people get strange compliments ;).
Okay, you are caling her strange in the first two sentences. I wouldn't play that card because it's not really a neg just a flat insult, but you play it off pretty well. I think the way you did it comes off playful but many woman wouldn't put up with this.
Quote:
It really stands out. It is not the typical "OMG I love to laugh" "Twilight is like.. OMG Edward!!" "Music=LIFE" "I am a bitch, but really sweet" blah blah blah shallow stereotypical random internet chick nonsense.
I like this part of the message. It displays your funny personality and is a basic cold read on her showing she's not this way. It's a small compliment to her as wlel in a way. :)
Quote:
You'll still get a a lot of the weirdos as well obviously, but you've got a plethora of ways to mess with em. You'll definitely make friends, meet some awesome people with this. Hell, you may even end up one of my friends ;)."
I'm not sure what you were trying to accomplish with this. I agree women get hit up by lots of weird guys but tell us something we don't know. Then of course you start to position yourself as a friend. Yes you can pull this out but not a good idea to through yourself down into that LJBF pit.

I would have gone with something like, "It's obvious from your profile that you true to who you are and what you're about. I'd definitely like to get to know you better. Tell me what was it like growing up for you?"

I'd do this to display direct interest in her. This isn't a big deal because we are already showing interest in the girl by messaging her anyways. I just spell it out for her so there is no confusion about what I want. Then I always end with a question to further the conversation and go right into stories. That is a nice bridge for me later to tell my DHV stories to her later.

Hope it helps you out,

~Jon

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 Post subject: Online Direct
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 9:35 pm 
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Online Direct

Being direct and to the point with what you want online is a large key to success on the Internet. I don't use any fancy openers or lines when it comes to meeting and attracting women online I'm just up front about what I want.

With that being said there is some measure of restraint you need to have when being direct online. If you email a girl saying, "Hey you're cute and I'm a pickup artist want to come over for a great night of sex?" I'm guessing thats not going to work too well for you.

As a real life example this is what I said to a girl today on Match. I first tried to chat with her via the Match.com chat since she was online but the chat system didn't work. I sent her this message below, then immediately she texted me and I setup a date to cook her dinner at her place. :)

"The Match Chat I think was having some issues. You seem like a really easy person to talk to so let me level with you. I think you are polite, have a big heart, and are very attractive! I'd really like the opportunity to take you out for some coffee with conversation or dinner sometime. =) I just have this feeling that you're a great person and I'd like to get to know you better.

You are welcome to message me back here or if you want you can shoot me a text. xxx-xxx-xxxx Jon"


Most guys wouldn't send this message because they would say that's AFC you need to be more indirect then show interest. "Hello?!?" You are messaging a girl online. Your actions show you are interested before she reads the first word. You might as well be honest about what you want.

This actually happens to me a lot. I am just very up front with what I want and what I'm looking for. Girls respond very well to this, and more often than not, they respond favorably. Keep in mind as you message women online to be more direct about what you want as far as a relationship goes, who you are, and that you want to meet her.

~Jon

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 4:23 am 
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How does on keep up the comfort/rapport/attraction over the internet/phone over a long period of time. Ok, so I've number closed an HB on a social networking site. I've gotten several IOIs, the number obviously, she has made very straightforward comments that she is physically attracted and is very willing to meet. I've spoken with her over the phone once, tried to set up a meeting, but for honest reasons she won't be able to for awhile(a week max).

She's attracted to me NOW,normally I'd surf this comfort/rapport wave during the initial meet and build up more tension, go for the k or f close. I'd like to keep the levels of comfort and rapport up but I'm not sure how to do that for an extended time over text/phone/email.

Any Suggestions?


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 9:47 am 
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Hi J, Hi everyone,

OK I do not know where this fits in but it is related to online sarging so let's post it here.

I had a few cases where girls I'd been sarging online through a dating site last month or earlier have now started to write to my direct email address. As I'm usually using the site on a freebie and have limited time I have included my email address as a failsafe. Well that works.

Ok these girls are contacting me or re-engaging but they seem very flaky. Obviously contacting me is a big IOI but what the f--k is going on with them as they seem to be very unresponsive when I reply? Of 4 girls who have contacted me I can only think of one occasion where I came across as too needy. I haven't heard back from her. As for the other 3, they seem to have fallen into a email tennis thing. I've stated quite clearly that I'm not interested in that. Are they re-engaging simply for attention? Messing me around? Need more attraction or comfort to shift it offline?

I'm kind of confused and a little p-ssed off by this.I have been careful in what I have written back to these girls so it's not needy or negative.

Advice or comments would be appreciated


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 12:15 pm 
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How does on keep up the comfort/rapport/attraction over the internet/phone over a long period of time. Ok, so I've number closed an HB on a social networking site. I've gotten several IOIs, the number obviously, she has made very straightforward comments that she is physically attracted and is very willing to meet. I've spoken with her over the phone once, tried to set up a meeting, but for honest reasons she won't be able to for awhile(a week max).

She's attracted to me NOW,normally I'd surf this comfort/rapport wave during the initial meet and build up more tension, go for the k or f close. I'd like to keep the levels of comfort and rapport up but I'm not sure how to do that for an extended time over text/phone/email.

Any Suggestions?
LaVitaeBreve,

Yes you need to just ride that comfort/rapport wave like you are talking about until the meetup. I have had this happen to me several times as well. In the mean time send some short text message like, "Have a good day! :D, Hope you're not working too hard," little stuff like that. Don't engage in huge conversations via text and wait on your replies.

Then at night I'd recommend calling and building rapport over the phone a few times before the interaction. Not everynight because you are going to tell her your busy doing something some of those nights just so you don't have to talk to her each night and we don't over do it on the talking. We want something for you to talk about on the date right?

She is attracted to you so the hard part is over. Just relax, ride the wave, stretch it out, and closer to time of the meet talk to her a bit more to highten anticipation. If you want to start building tension a day or so before the date go for it!

Jon

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 Post subject: HAPPY B-DAY TO ME
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 12:16 pm 
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IT's JSMOOTH's Birthday today!

Image

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 12:20 pm 
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Hi J, Hi everyone,

OK I do not know where this fits in but it is related to online sarging so let's post it here.

I had a few cases where girls I'd been sarging online through a dating site last month or earlier have now started to write to my direct email address. As I'm usually using the site on a freebie and have limited time I have included my email address as a failsafe. Well that works.

Ok these girls are contacting me or re-engaging but they seem very flaky. Obviously contacting me is a big IOI but what the f--k is going on with them as they seem to be very unresponsive when I reply? Of 4 girls who have contacted me I can only think of one occasion where I came across as too needy. I haven't heard back from her. As for the other 3, they seem to have fallen into a email tennis thing. I've stated quite clearly that I'm not interested in that. Are they re-engaging simply for attention? Messing me around? Need more attraction or comfort to shift it offline?

I'm kind of confused and a little p-ssed off by this.I have been careful in what I have written back to these girls so it's not needy or negative.

Advice or comments would be appreciated
Skypirate1965,

I agree that them messaging you via email is big IOI. I hate the email tennis bullshit as well believe me. The best thing you can do is to get them calling you or vice versa as fast as humanly possible to avoid that. If you've already traded some emails with the girl I'd send something pretty direct and to the point.

"Hey, You seem like a really cool person and I definitely want to get to know you more. Here's the thing I don't get a chance to check my email that often. Why don't you text me so we can talk easier. 555-123-55555"

If she really likes you she will message you, and if she doesn't well you've ruled out one more person you have to follow up with and that sort of thing. Don't get into the email game because that can takes anywhere from a week to a month to complete depending on the girl.

~Jon

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