Ok, so my count is 5, but I'll be honest that of those, 2 were attractive. I'm overly picky on safety and diseases, and I'm trying to just go for it instead of settling for . . . Skeletor. However, meeting new girls is . . . new, especially in a crowded SPAM. I've been reading Neal Straus' The Game, and armed with my little ammo, I went at it.

I went to a bar that I'm familiar with around midnight. I tried to flamingo it up by wearing a gaudy Hawaiian tie. I walked around, and all I could think was, "Okay, she's with a guy, pairs don't easily split, and I don't know how to dive into a group uninvited - people don't like to be interrupted!" After literally 30 minutes of wandering and feeling lame, I approached a group with Mystery's Pez approach. "Want a Pez?" EVERYBODY likes Pez. Yeah, crinkled noses later, I came off as a creep with a weird tie, so I left them. I ditched the tie.

Finally, I just dove into a group with a, "Is this a private party, or may anyone join?" One girl left immediately thinking I was a creep. I got witty and kept the rest. One girl was obviously the leader of the pack. The girl I started with was cute, shy, and conservative. I hit it off with her well. The other girl . . . well, I insulted Texas, and she's from there. Lost big points, and I over-apologized for my comment (what the hell do you do? I tried to joke it off with, "Well, I'll just talk to you - already lost points with her . . . ). So, I ended up doing what I do best - being the nice boy that my momma taught me to be, and I spent darned near 45 minutes chatting with Mrs. Conservative. She's not a bad girl and I'd love to be her friend, but just not what you sarge for, ya know? Got her number (literally the first number I've EVER gotten from a strange girl that I've just met), and 15 minutes later, I did the gentleman thing again and sent her a thank you note for the evening.

Okay, my obvious problems. While I may be comfortable once I'm IN a group, I have trouble approaching. I'm pretty convinced that crowded bars are a BAD place to sarge - I thought it would be easier to cut my teeth on. Nope - can't tell one person from the next. Openers just made me look like a creep, and my stupid flamingo stunt didn't seem to help, either. I just looked gay. Also, I'm WAY too nice. I tried to neg the leader girl, but after my Texas comment, I'd just completely lost it. So, I just went into gentleman mode on the conservative girl. While I got digits . . . there's no way I'd kiss close with this one unless I was a boyfriend, pretty much.

My questions - where should I sarge to cut my teeth? It's hard to talk in loud bars, and approaching groups that don't want to be interrupted just sucks. Openers - mine all failed. They all seem corny or unnatural. "Hi, my name is" may be generic, but it seems to be what people are used to. Suggestions? My flamingo attempt. Give outfit examples that I could do without revamping my ENTIRE wardrobe, if you could.

Well, at least I got a number, right?

Hey don't put yourself down. You approached, you tried things - that is a success not a failure

you remind me of myself a year ago. nowadays, im worried about my short game, but not my opening. heck, i went sarging with some buddies, and I always made it a point to open the set. Friends get approach anxiety. But its tough when you're alone. Something I picked up from this one guy, when I was quite a bit more advanced in my game was the idea of a base to return to. If you dont bring friends, you gotta make some. While this isnt actually necessary, it doesnt hurt. Find a fellow sarger there, and bam you're good. But dont put yourself down. Recap what happened, and do better next time. Even if you changed one thing, you improved, and David DeAngelo said the game is like playing an instrument. It takes months, years to get really good at it. It takes another few to master it.

As Profi said, it will take time. I think that a lot of men do not allow themselves the time to learn and improve. Yes it is likely to be uncomfortable and possibly painful. but if you persist you will get there