How do Opinion Openers Work???



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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 10:11 am 
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Hey, sorry about another post. But hey, I don't actually know ANYTHING about getting girls, so I'm completely empty. Need help.
People keep on saying about opinion openers. Now, what's the deal with them? Why on earth would you ask someone their opinion with stuff that they're not experts on? Like, why would you ask someone who you don't know about stuff? How on earth would that work without the person thinking "why are you asking me this?"? Like, if you really wanted to know, wouldn't you ask your friends? Or, wouldn't you ask someone who knows?

For example, when people ask "where is the shop?" etc or something, why wouldn't you just ask the centre info people or look at the map? People would be like "look for yourself, you lazy person" They're only answering so that they're not rude, and that means they don't want you there. This especially irks me when people suggest that you go out of your way to ask them an opinion rather than being practical, if you actually did want to know their opinion.

Does anybody actually test this, or are everybody just script-writers? I'd like to know some examples specifically, and some that aren't stupid and impractical that I could use. I just want something that I can go 'hey, I can actually use this' without thinking I'm a tool and not bothering approaching.

Cheers, and sorry for sounding so negative but I'm feeling really low as I've been doing this for about a year now and nothing's worked.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 12:03 pm 
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Okay, first things first. They say when you go into set (approach and open), generally they're going to be thinking two things - "why are you speaking to me?" and "how long are you going to stay?". Apart from good body language and frame control and such, this is why False Time Constraints are important, along with follow-up stories and reasoning behind asking questions and getting feedback/opinions.

Also, you question the appropriateness of using opinion openers. Well, here's an example of how you could pull it off without rousing suspicion - say you're milling about, talking to some people you know, and some HBs are nearby. You leave the people you're with (quickly depending on how much AA you get), the approach and open with the opinion opener, something like "I've gotta get back in a sec, but we were just talking about _____, and was wondering what you think about _____. Because the thing is, _____". And obviously, you can keep it going if you have their attention. In their mind, they'll just think it was convenient to get someone else's input on something, as opposed to seeming like you're hitting on them.

People don't have to be known experts on topics for others to strike up a friendly conversation, especially when it comes to more subjective things you can discuss and debate. Basically, I'd recommend you go out and field test all kinds of openers for yourself, in this case questions and opinions, and see what kind of reactions you get. Might be different than you expect! Or it might not be so good, big deal. A lot of this process is personal trial-and-error.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 1:34 pm 
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Quote:
Okay, first things first. They say when you go into set (approach and open), generally they're going to be thinking two things - "why are you speaking to me?" and "how long are you going to stay?". Apart from good body language and frame control and such, this is why False Time Constraints are important, along with follow-up stories and reasoning behind asking questions and getting feedback/opinions.

Also, you question the appropriateness of using opinion openers. Well, here's an example of how you could pull it off without rousing suspicion - say you're milling about, talking to some people you know, and some HBs are nearby. You leave the people you're with (quickly depending on how much AA you get), the approach and open with the opinion opener, something like "I've gotta get back in a sec, but we were just talking about _____, and was wondering what you think about _____. Because the thing is, _____". And obviously, you can keep it going if you have their attention. In their mind, they'll just think it was convenient to get someone else's input on something, as opposed to seeming like you're hitting on them.

People don't have to be known experts on topics for others to strike up a friendly conversation, especially when it comes to more subjective things you can discuss and debate. Basically, I'd recommend you go out and field test all kinds of openers for yourself, in this case questions and opinions, and see what kind of reactions you get. Might be different than you expect! Or it might not be so good, big deal. A lot of this process is personal trial-and-error.
Yes! See this is what I was thinking. There was one massive time where me and my mates were questioning whether a word existed (my mate said it did, I maintain it doesn't..."punce"= not a word, right? Ponce is the right word.) and there were some fine chicks nearby. This is the only situation where I thought it would have worked. But any of these day-game, on your own "Hey I was just wondering" stuff just seems like it's not going to work, just looks really unnatural and awkward.


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 10:39 am 
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Hey Sexton,

If you're finding certain types of approach unnatural and have tried them a few times and it still feels weird then try other ways. I think you may find situational openers far easier and more natural. A possible way is to approach with a bland standard neutral question - what's the time, where is x? And then elaborate on this by then doing an opinion opener.

Here's an example. To build up my confidence (which in my case is very erratic) I went out and asked various people standard stuff . One lady I saw outside a Tattoo shop I asked if she knew where a certain bar/club that played rock music was as I was new to the area. Tattoos and rock go together so it's a mind numbing natural question. When she helped me I started asking her about locations of alternatives and then asked her opinion what was the best one. We probably talked for about 15 minutes.

Generally I've found that most people are polite and helpful. If it feels weird to ask something than it's probably going to feel weird for the person to answer it.

In terms of numbers it's great to visit a busy place and try opinion openers but be aware that in the back of their minds they maybe thinking why is he asking *me* this and not those people that were nearer to him. In this respect it's easier to ask when someone is more isolated.The thought -why me - will be unlikely to occur if they are isolated.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 3:46 pm 
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Opinion openers do work, but they have to be done right, and they have to be believable unless you have already some kind of value.

My advice is that you find some material that you are genuinely interested in hearing a female opinion on. It has been suggested that you should watch/listen to relationship talk shows, pay attention to what's going on in your friends lives, etc. so that you'll have material to talk about. Ex: your friend is going through a rough breakup, but he feels like he has more to say to his ex. From a female perspective, what's the best thing he could do here?

Asking for directions to the store isn't really an opinion opener, that's just asking for information. These sorts of openers can work too if you stack them properly. Hey, do you know where the Gap is? Nice sweater. I bet you're a gap person aren't you? No? H&M? I KNEW you loved those huge stores. Etc. Etc.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 4:47 pm 
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Okey. I think its hard to use opinion openers aswell -daytime.
I dont do daygame on random people. (Well sometimes, but it just happens..)

But in bars and clubs.. Its perfect.

I only use really stupid opion openerns that are fun.
I also take a stand that is stupid so the girl Im talking to will
come at me.. then Ill defend myself by using a really stupid example
and throw loads of teasing negs at her. Then I'll slightly turn my back
as if walking away, then go: I fell kind of bad, maybe you deserve a second chance. Say 3 things about yourself that are fucking awsome..

Example:
Me: Hey, quick question. My friends and I are having diffrent opinions on this VERY important thing.
Set: Okey..
Me: So lets say we have a number of people that has to eat the same thing
everyday. Breakfust, Lunch, Dinner. Just one thing, though. Who would survive the longest?
Robbie here thinks Eggs are the thing. Matt wants to eat Broccoli.
And myself.. Im goin with Chocolate milkshake.
What would you guys have?

Whatever the girls say just: Nooo? What? You wouldnt survive half an hour eating that? Bla bla..
And if they used mix components like Pasta, tell them its more then one thing.
They'll come back at you saying the Milkshake is more then one thing too.
Tell them: "Thats a diffrent thing. Milkshake is one of mankinds greatest achivments.. its totally exkluded from the "Only-one-thing-rule"..
What are they teaching kids theese days?

And so on.

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:32 pm 
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actually i only use opinion openers ( most during day game ) when you do it well you don't have to do FTC or any of that crap... if your opinion opener is plausible enough they really will dig it.

you know why i like it ? because you ask something and then let the girl talk... it's ideal if you don't have much material to talk about. you let the girl talk to .. il give you a few examples :

normal opener : ''hey i see you girls shopping, but really no offense but you look around like your stealing - il bet your shoppaholics''

ok what do you know about them ? they probably reply with a smile and ask what they should steal..... you can say steal this for me and blablabla.

This doesn't tell you anything about the person with normal openers you have to act with moxie and talk like 80 - 90 %, with opinion openers you can find out your target interests right away so you can talk on that.

opinion opener ( emphasis on asking ) : ok il set the time on my watch 30 minutes backwards..... : now i approach a woman '' hi i got a question i just saw 2 clocks and im afraid the time isn't right..either my watch or that clock i just saw. ( showing her my watch ) can i have a look on your watch ?

BECAUSE she sees the time on my watch ( the time on my watch isn't the right time ) it's very plausible.. im not lieing or manipulating ( at least she thinks ) with most girls you don't have to use a FTC ... maybe only use a FTC when you follow up.

normal opinion opener : hey can i have your input on this.... my girlfriend is dissing me about it ( waving to a random girl - of course i approached her before so she waves back - or you can say hey she doesn't see me.. anyway) .. but only people who are single can answer this - i don't want to offend anyone because i just met you... so.

she will say ''im not single or '' i got a boyfriend''
if she doesn't say she has a boyfriend but still asks about the question she is probably interested ( BF or no BF )

in store :

me: '' hey i got a question .. i need a female opinion - i want to give a friend some cologne but most colognes are like mustardgas and im not experienced with female-colognes so do you know a good parfume ? ''

--- now i know if shes into parfumes --- or she isn't into it

ok '' i think giving a bottle of cologne isn't very original do you know something original ? what would you like ''

she will tell you : oh maybe give her this or this .....
you instantly know what your target likes

before she fully answers go like

neg : '' hey what cologne are you wearing ? ... smells a bit like that mustardgas i smelled at the sample section, don't worry i won't run away i like mustardgas''

------

opinion opener : '' hey over a few minutes i got a date ... what do you think of my hair is it ok enough ?

she : yeah well ... ( constructive critisism, she can say yes- yes means attraction and no means shes making fun of you )

me : interupt)) yeah well ? don't you like brown hair ?

she : yes (or no).. (if she says yes , she says it because she is polite or she is attracted to brown colored hair.)

she : blablabla yeah your hair is ok ( or she says i like it ).

me : im not mister insecure but im dating this model and i don't want to mess things up .. do you think im dressed allright ?

she : yeah or no if she gives contructive critisism shes really telling you what she likes. if she say plain yes then she is attracted

by now she likes brown hair and your outfit - she has simply gave 2 IOI's ... i didn't say alot i just kept it natural and short.

its hard to give examples because IT NEVER GOES THE SAME WAY ... every opinion opener will receive a different reply because everyone got his own opinion. it will never go like into a fixed scenario.

because your target is talking more instead of you you can easily come up with new material or negs.

when asking opnions :

Be alone.. don't go up there with your friend or female friend
'' hey i need your input on this .. my girlfriend ..blabla'' don't ask this with your girlfriend or female friend next to you ... you could easily ask her. be plausible

Don't neg before the target has invested or don't neg before you target give IOIs, if you neg your target after asking he or she will conclude your only there to make fun of her.

Be plausible : don't ask time while you got your own watch ( with right time on it )

Don't look insecure : '' hey what do you think about the way im dressed '' never seek confirmation ... its DLV. rather say '' what do you think about the way im dressed, i got this date with this model (DHV)

Don't ask stupid question and don't talk about creepy topics: when your at the bus station - don't ask when the bus arrives because there's a schedule hanging there.
Don't talk about sexual topics ... if your target agrees and talk about secual topics she's probably a low quality who wants to fuck anything on 2 legs. but most people are freaked out.

don't ask too many questions : you don't enter a fastfood restaurant to ask about your outfit , haircut and way of looking if you ask too many questions your target implies your hitting on her.
2 questions are ok as long they are follow ups ... don't switch topics too quick

Don't neg on something that isn't relevant : Neg the target on what she just said ( when she replied )


you can ask everything as long your cocky and funny

during daygame : ask constructive questions + while being cocky and funny

gaming in clubs : you can ask whatever you want as long your cocky and funny

conclusion :

pro's

opinion openers are easy and quick ... you don't have to be original and you will find out your targets interests.

Opinion openers are plausible... and opens up new topics ( mostly topics your target will come up with) you can neg on her replies.

Opinion openers are very actual .. you can ask an opinion about a certain venue or decorative feature ( peacocking)

Opinion openers Work on any group of people , men , female , black , white , gay, gothic .. you simple adjust your opinion openers

Because you do less talking it's easy to watch your targets body language and
physical behaviour, opinions can give of IOI's if you got brown hair and she tell you she likes brown hair ... well that's a IOI to some degree.

Cons :

It will never go like you want to .... opinions are very different .
Some people aren't familiar with fashion or a certain subject .. they could say they don't know anything about it. It has to be plausible.

You have to have a natural game to some degree .... youre seeking reaction instead of giving reaction ... therefore you give away some control

Don't ask high quality girls : what i've found out is that high quality girls often see opinion openers as rapport seeking or confirmation seeking. Don't ask the hottest girl but rather ask her less hotter friend... asking the hottie a questions is like giving her attention .... don't do that.

when you ask the ''HB 5' and get into conversation you will notice the ''HB 10'' seeking attention from you.
you have 3 options when this happens :

disagree with the Hb 10 ( don't disagree on logical level.. keep it opinion )
Ignore the HB 10
Neg the HB 10 : '' wait a second were talking '' '' do you always interrupt ( smiling)''

the hot girl will think (context) '' why the hell is he interested in her im much hotter'' i always therefore ask Guys or Hb 5 or lower...

you will see what i mean unless you calibrate ....

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 10:31 am 
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Hey Lodewijkp,

some good stuff in there. I liked the time opener when you've set your watch wrong. I think you could even work in a false time constraint in there. You could say you need to know the correct time as you may be late for a bus, train, meeting someone etc. You could possibly use it as another time constraint for an instant date should things go well. you know - "Oh shit that's the time! I'll have to wait for the next one...let's grab some coffee together, you can tell me all about yourself..."

The stealing line about shoppers is a good one too.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 12:33 pm 
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Hi Lodewijkp

thumbs up for your post. very detailed and it carrys many interesting ideas there. I am now in high school in your country's context. Ive been looking around and there is this girl i really like. I have not talked to her b4. But i hear from a friend she likes shopping. Any idea how i could use something along the line of shopping as an opinion opener ? I just want to be friend her first. Number close is not important.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 1:21 pm 
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Quote:
... I just want to be friend her first. Number close is not important.
No, no,no......no! Trying to be a friend first and you are almost definitely going to end up just friends for eternity.You almost have zero chance of moving it to boyfriend or whatever.Aim for what you want she can always relegate you to the friend zone


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 2:19 pm 
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well ... just walk up to her and say '' hey you look like you shop much... do you know some cool shops ?''

she : .... (she hooks or not anyway throw in a follow up , don't give up )...anyway Listen to what she says and look to her body language

me : you look a little bit shopaholic ... well all girls are shopaholic but the way your dressed make a certain statement. ( FTC now)

if she asks about the statement say something funny/ cocky.

1. well you know hugh hefner ?: P
2. like bubble gum .. sweet on the outside .. but stingy in the middle.
3. well your making a blonde statement .. most people say blonde people are dumb but now im seeing you i think your different ( you can add : or at least i hope so ).

follow up question with kino.

me : hey do you know the time : grab her hand to look on her watch : It's even better when you only touch her watch, it's still opening so avoid grabbing her whole wrist or hand::

does she comply with your kino ? --- > give compliment about her watch ( you reward her for letting you touch her)

she pulls back ? --- > me : whoa there's nothing to be scared about , i ain't a vampire - something tells me you don't hang around with guys.

before she replies on your neg --- > well then don't shop too much.. spend more time with people ! ( keep smiling when saying this )


you can go on and on and on .. just be sure to stand next to her when you kino.... i found out that it you are in opening sequence : A1.A2.A3 it's better if you kino her when standing next to her (to her side ), you can also tell her you accidentally touched her but still don't give a fuck. this is harder when your standing in front of her... daygame is different to some degree...

You can ask anything but be sure to have some information, that girl is interested in shopping so thats quitte actual and plausible.

o yeah .... don't get friends.. don't let her befriend you ! ..... keep kino her and don't comply to her tests In short words : be a badboy - Don't respect her beauty or her personality, don't be a ashole either.
The more respect you have for her ... the more you shut down.

Remember girls with male friends ARE Friends because they tried but didn't get laid ... they ended up in the friendship zone like her lesbian friends, i don't have female ''friends'' because i DONT end up in the friendship zone. girls want guys to not touch them so they can all be girls together , Don't be that girl please....


1. opinon opener
2. wait until she answers .. analyze body language and so forth. ( she can look un-interested but this is her Bitch shield ... don't give up )
3. reply on what she says and turn it into neg preparation ( i prefer cocky/funny)
4. Tease neg ( FTC after you tease negged her do it before you start with 5, you look less needy when doing this.
5. Second opinion opener
6. don't wait until she ended her speech but kino her, let her distract herself wit her own talking ( grabbing her watch and moving her hand towards you ). Because shes talking shes less able to pull away.
7. reward kino allowance( compliment her watch or whatever or NEG Her when you get defied.

From 7 it's getting to A2 and A3 so right now you have to be natural or apply a method, YOU cannot use a new opinion opener at this stage - also because you already opened her ......

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 2:54 pm 
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Thanks for the fast response! this is gold!

anyway, I live in a conservative society. If you haven't already known, its Singapore. And that sucks! Hope, the PUA stuff can be applied there. Situation in UK or western areas are much better. :twisted:


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 3:43 pm 
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Lodewijkp your post are gold btw.


I Love opinion openers maybe a bit to much :) when I was working one breaking social anxiety I would use to take an Opinion opener and open entire coffee shops and turn the whole shop into a big group I loved it not really pua stuff but got me past that step fast and they feel right to me now though I sometimes am slow to cut them but I usually survive ;). I would even do that on a day 2 now that was money talk about leader of men getting an entire establishment in a conversation you started.


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