Please see below – anyone have anything to add before I write back?

Dear Jimmy,

I need some advice. I picked up this brunette HB9 and she’s absolutely stunning. It’s been going really great, she’s texting me every day and we even started calling each other every night (past 3 nights) but here’s the thing!

She’s shy, like real shy and so the conversations on the phone vary from flirty and game to basically mundane boring things, only because I run out of things to say! She’s slowly starting to be more open which is good, but I have a date with her in 2 days and I don’t want awkward silences during that time (unless I’m going in for a K-close)

Would you happen to have any good conversation starters that are playful, instead of boring friend shit? I want some games, something flirty.

Thanks in advance Jimmy


There’s a LOT to discuss here. I’ll focus on what your questions actually is - Good conversation starters that are playful instead of friend shit.

First – what stage are you at? You’re at comfort. Forget openers. Forget silly DHV routines and magic tricks. She’s attracted, you’re on a date You are in comfort.

Second I’d say you don’t want to avoid being her friend, that’s exactly what you want to be. You want to avoid being NON SEXUAL and being in the just friends zone.

Now you’re in comfort but you’re still going to DHV yourself and qualify why you like her from time to time.

Everything I say from now on is relevant to girls I date – you have to look at your date and make the REASON in what I say below fit her.

So I live in London and I date hot girls who are 24 to 28. Most London girls in that age bracket love to travel. So do I. So I talk about holidays a lot. And I have a lot of DHV stories about holidays. When I talk about it I avoid the normal stuff, like a hairdresser ‘going on holiday this year’, I’ll get into it by saying:

‘Do you like Thai food, I just got back from Thailand’
‘Oh wow I am going there in September’.
‘Wha!! Christ! Poor old Thailand, I’d better warn them trouble makers coming’ (friendly squeeze as I am saying it then push her off as I finish – push pull)
‘You’re going to love it (DHV – master of her environment). The guys told me they’d take me anywhere for my birthday (DHV – leader of men) and I chose Thailand. With whom are you going?’

At this point I can flim flam about travel for ages. I just remember to keep getting the DHVs into the conversation. Not big ones because I am in comfort, but it doesn’t hurt to remind her she’s with a man of value.

DHVs (all true for me) – I won’t say them ALL, just one or two will fit the conversation as they fit.

‘My big mission when I go on holiday is to get something for my niece that will make her curious about other countries’ – protector of friends and family/likes children.

If she asks me where I am going next - I travel a lot to interesting places. I like to take my mum sometimes. She’s getting older so I do it while I can – protector of friends and family

If she talks about Europe -The time I took my girl to Nice, in France. It was an adventure. I sold a vintage guitar on Ebay and she’d been having a rough time, family problems, her agency weren’t being cool with her – Pre Selection.

Eastern Europe - The time I booked some gigs in and took my band to Croatia and I decided last minute we’d drive 11 hours up to Sarajevo – leader of men.


Once I am chatting about travel I can include her with role play and get her INVESTED in me and her.

‘I’ve always wanted to go the Greek islands. Are you any good with a mop?’
‘A mop!?’
Yeah, I’ll hire a sail boat and sail round the islands but I need someone to mop the deck afer my wild parties’
‘ha ha ha’
Yeah, I’ll be the captain you can be the captain’s mate. It’ll look like I am not working, but I am telling you now, when I am in the deck chair with my eyes closed and a beer in my hand, I am actually planning where we’re going next. So don’t get angry and stop tidying up’

When you’re teasing her you are getting lots of kino in. So this avoids you being in the friends zone.


So look at your girl. What is the conversation going to be about? If I was dating a 16 year old I wouldn’t rattle on about taking my mum to Malta. She’s probably not excited by travel yet so she won’t become invested by my conversations.


Think what she likes, get your DHVs ready to fit that conversation and go for it.

NOTE :

No matter what a girl says to me. If a girl says she likes the circus …. I have a DHV for it. I just take my standard one and adapt it.

‘My big mission when I go on holiday is to get something for my niece that will make her curious about other countries’ becomes ‘I take my niece to as many different events as I can, I want her to be curious about things in life. The circus is a good idea’

I travel a lot to interesting places. I like to take my mum sometimes. She’s getting older so I do it while I can’ becomes ‘I go to a lot of interesting events. I like to take my mum sometimes. She’s getting older so I do it while I can, the circus is a good idea’.


If you’re really up for it, then I always walk my dates past a lingerie shop, I pull them in close and tell them what I am going to dress them in. If they lean into me, I tell them what I am going to do to them. If they’re less receptive; I push them off playfully and say ‘but you’d probably ruin the moment and want to keep your Spongebob Squarepants knickers on, God I can’t believe you wear those’.

Loads more I could say. Loads. Remember you’re in C2 so read up on it.

But it’s enough for now I think.

Good Luck.

Jimmy Jambone