My girlfriend dumped me on Friday night.

She wasn't mean and had nothing but great things to say about me. She just said it wasn't the same as it used to be.

I know since that night, she has told people, she thinks I'm great, the nicest guy in the world and isn't sure if she made the right decision.

What should I do to win her back? I can't stop thinking about her... before she came along I was having great success in the field. I don't want to go back to the field. I want her back.

B-Man

Whether you like it or not, you're in the field.

Whether you choose to game her, and get stuck on a one-itis trap or move on to other women is your choice. As a consolation though, you were having great success in the field before she came along.

Why not take a break from relationships, game, pickup and such? If you can't be happy without a woman (or a specific woman), you can't be happy even in a relationship. If she changes her mind, well and great. If not, prepare to move on.

If it's not the same, obviously your whole mentality has changed and the way you acted in the field when you first met her is drastically different from the new "nice" guy you are.

I agree with mokole. Maybe getting back into the game will help a little in reviving the person you were and you can decide then if she is still what you want. If she is, maybe the change will cause the spark between you again that she first enjoyed.

been in ur position, hot gf that you love and are attached to... definitely dont want to feel what you feel right now, at least in my case it hurt like hell...
the crazy part is that she was probably attracted to the player/baller in you, at the start of the relationship, partially due to the fact that you were desired by other chicks, partially because you knew you could have others so you werent all into your ex like you were towards the end of the relationship...
you probably made the mistake too of showing her too often how happy she made you, and that kills the vibe/mystery and makes you a 'done deal' that she doesnt have to work for anymore... young chicks hate that, older prefer it due to security/stability/predictability.
its the sad truth, she'll probably think of you more and more when she gets older and realizes that you were/are special...

chasing her back now, in my experience, is very hard and can amplify the emotional damage you undergo cause in the case you dont get her you'll have all that time in your memory of obsessing about her and just getting a cold shoulder.

my advice is to reorganize your life, cut it off and pick up sports or something endorphin rich and jump back into the field... I wish I handled it like that... instead I went down the obsessive path which just drove her away and fucked me up more than I was already... living in a big city in this situation helps since you can avoid seeing her and people associated with her... small cities less so...


ofcourse get other peoples opinions too, your case could be completely different from mine

good luck
go get really drunk and hang out with your friends

Sorry to hear that mate. The only thing I can think about is that you need to meet new women right now to get your mind straight, and even better, make your ex jealous.

Its not a fast process mate . Good luck!

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There is NO secret ingredient. Theres just you.

Posted my post 2 times for some unknown reason.

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There is NO secret ingredient. Theres just you.

Considering I do not know your personality/frame off and in field, if you don't mind, I am going to take a stab at it anyways. I think she could be right: things are not like they used to be. When you first met her "in-field", you had with you a certain frame and vibe because you were out to have fun / pick-up / whatever. Once you started hanging out with her and dating, you began to feel more comfortable around her and that frame/vibe she saw in you began to subtly mellow out because you 'became yourself' and it's not the same frame she thought you had.
Well you said you had great success before, so first thing I would do is get back in-field because that may be just what you need to re-spark that frame/vibe that your ex-girlfriend saw in you when she first met you.

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"Vincit Qui Se Vincit"

I will have to agree with everyone else here...it sounds like turned off your alpha once you were in a secure relationship.
You went from being her lover to being her friend.
Being nice is not a compliment.

That is exactly what I mean. You just switched frames. Your frame when you are out is what attracted her, but you went back to your old self behind closed doors and that's not "who" she fell in love with. It's this terrible Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde scenario that I've been seeing occur a lot lately.

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"Vincit Qui Se Vincit"

the big thing I noticed when people say stuff like that. You know like "things aren't the same as they used to be" it really just means the guy changed.

Its important to remember the things that get the girl are the things that keep the girl. So you got her with PUA and then turned into a pussy

If you want her back, you have to get over her, and meet new people(women).