why didn't things go smoothly?



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:12 pm 
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During the 1st week of college in September...I selected 2 targets to work on

1.) SHY GUY- I approached him in the school library and we talked for 1 hour about fluff-interestes, hobbies, likes, dislikes. We usually bump into eachother on campus and we talked for 1 hour 2 other times before. He usually pops up when i least expect it. He admited the 1st day we met that hes shy. I thought he should make a move and do a number close on me...but he didn't. I decided to do something about it and when we chatted about movies, I suggested we watch one together. The days he was available, I was busy. Finally he suggested we meet on Tuesday. Tuesday comes along and i wait in the library for 5 mins. He didn't show up. I walked around campus and didn't see him. It has been a week in a half and I still haven't seen him.

2.) Ten- I call him 10 cuz he's a HG10. He sits next to me in class. I talked to him 1st day of class. Usually I see him wandering around school alone. after 3 weeks, he approached me and opened with "sorry to intrude, but does that say keg stand on your notebook?" we chatted from time to time when i saw him sitting alone at the library. I know he likes to workout so i suggested we go to the gym and he sayd wed works best for him. weds in class he says nothing to me, and in the end of class he taps me on the shoulder and says hey as hes about to leave. i ask him about the gym and he said he went yesterday. he said i should go to the gym tomorrow when he goes with his buddies....


During this month, I have accomplished not much. I approached both, but I feel as a girl, they should both numberclose on me, which they didn't. Ten may have better game than shy guy, but where did I go wrong here? why did they both backout on plans that I made?

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:54 pm 
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When gaming these [if you did] maybe you made them feel like they stand no chance? Even though you asked them to do stuff, maybe you gave them the idea that they can never have you, and dont wanna hang around feeling like you're just flaunting the fact they cant have you? etc...

~Blend


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:55 pm 
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You're expecting those guys to know about pick-up.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 07, 2009 12:07 am 
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I'm not an expert but you should start kino with him give him a hug or make up a handshake also display your stuff so he can't take his eyes off of you


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 07, 2009 1:27 am 
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With the 10 dude, you need to designate higher value. He opened you which is a good sign, but you haven't done anything to stand out to him since.

With the shy guy, just be the aggressor. Start kino with him especially. If you want him, you'll have to be the instigator.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 07, 2009 2:34 pm 
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Your putting to much into this, guys usually dont want girls to ask them out because in certain cases it emits neediness, u want to make him ask you. For guys its not so much winning them over emotionally, you have to attract them with real or an illusion of physical appeal. If a guy wants to take you to the gym its almost like another way of saying LJBF, but if you didnt go, then i expect you didnt cross that line yet. If I where you, I'd tell "10" that I didnt understand a certain subject, and ask him if he could help me study. This gives him a feeling of power even though you are in control. You want to seem needy but not too needy, there a fine line between damsel in distress and a needy nancy.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 07, 2009 2:39 pm 
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And as for Shy guys, if you get "10", which im sure you will, then you need not bother with the thought of him


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 08, 2009 12:46 am 
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During this month, I have accomplished not much. I approached both, but I feel as a girl, they should both numberclose on me, which they didn't. Ten may have better game than shy guy, but where did I go wrong here? why did they both backout on plans that I made?
The thing is you can't expect these guys to ask for your number when you approach them just because you are a girl. You are taking up the guy role here, which means you have to ask for their number. As far as why these two guys blew you off, there are various reasons to why they did. Its really hard to say why. You may been too aggressive in your approach or did not make things clear enough for them to show you where into them. Or they may not like girls asking them out. To you not raising their interest level high enough, which more than anything I bet is the case here. Because if you got their interest level higher they would have not backed out on you. I know this may sound absurd, but get the book or movie "He is not that into you".


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