I have a friend that ive gotten to know in the past couple of months. for our purposes, lets call her Monica.

Now Monica is spontaneous. she's fun to be with. She's childish, she's smart. She's shy, but she's not insecure.


now when i met her, i didn't think too much of her,
and now, a couple months later,

I WANT HER. not the sloppy fuck and throw away, but ACTUALLY WANT HER



now. this wouldn't be a problem, if I wasn't so incredibly close with her already.
We laugh, we make fun of each other. Sometimes we push each other and really jsut fight, but it always cools down because we just end up smiling, and laughing it out. and we REALLY fight. but it always ends with really friendly chatter, and just smoking on the balcony.

when i heard she was going out with her ex again, i felt JEALOUSY.
haven't felt that in a long enough time.


BASICALLY IM GOING AFC over her as a FRIEND, when i want her FOR MY OWN. ANY ADVICE?
i know there's been a lot of friend threads, but HAS ANYONE ACTUALLY FOUND A WAY THAT WORKS?

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move fast enough, and you can move people from one *normal* to another.

Hello my name is Iden Cross and i would like to start off by saying that reading this question made me think about my friend who was in the same position as you. I hate to say this , but your most likely in the friend zone and if your in your never gonna get out. I know you have feelings for her but if she thinks of you as a friend it aint gonna go anywhere. Having said that you should find a new girl because that sounds like a dead set. You should also be thankful you are friends with her because like i told you about my friend. Long story short she wanted to go out with her best guy friend who shes known for years and they both decided to give it a try. Well a month went bye and now there broken up and not talking. This situation is not easy and i cant force you on how to handle this but at the same time Ive been through this and so has my friends and the one thing Ive learned is that emotions can ruin a lot of things. As a pick up artist are main goal or at least one of them is to learn to control them, having said that i think this is one of those times your emotion needs to be controlled.

This is bullshit.

1: You can get out of the friend-zone
2: Emotions are not in your way, they are there to help you

To explain, getting out of the friend-zone is hard, though possible. You need to make more sexual contact in a confident way. That is your goal.

Emotions are good to have, but have them in a healthy perspective. You should be wanting her, not needing her. Both are emotions.

- Exerio

Well Exerio you said to have emotions in a healthy perspective what did you think i meant when i said control them. That means to control the negative aspect that emotions can bring and focus on the healthy part. Also we don’t knowhow deep he is in the friend zone, if he’s really deep it would be nearly impossible. I’m surprised a pua such as yourself would make such a blind mistake because although you are right it’s not impossible and my apologies for saying that it was, It will be so hard and there will have to be so much more effort put in and the question is why can’t you just go for a new girl and this way you get the stress of having to work ten times harder off your shoulders. Also if a man is deep in comfort and doesn’t have much attraction (friend zone) it doesn’t matter what he does because she doesn’t look at him as a potential mate or boyfriend. Now these are assumptions on my part maybe there is some attraction that you can build off her. I’m just saying if there isn’t and you’re in the friend zone don’t try and break it move on.

lets just say that im deep enough to know her bra size, in a non-sexual way.


now although it may seem like I NEED her, it's not so. subconsciously my mind has the capability of making her my one-itis, except that i also have a very warped view on the human psyche

no woman is perfect

i want the perfect woman

i cant get what i want.

but on the other hand, as the philosopher Jagger once said:
You can't always get what you want, but if you try hard enough, you can get what you need: sex.

but this isn't about my needs, its about my wants. how would you suggest i get out of the friend zone?

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move fast enough, and you can move people from one *normal* to another.

Well the way to get out of the friend zone would be less comfort and more attraction routines increase the kino and negs. The only problem is if she only thinks of you as a friend then doing this will do nothing but make things awkward. I trust you know if this is worth doing or not but regardless of what you decide I hope all goes well.

i agree with you geneis it probably is too much effort but i think that bassing this guys luck on what happened with ur friend when they actually tried it is not a fair example, i was in friends zone with a girl and unavailable then when i was available i ended up getting with her, and staying with her for 2years 8 months, so it differs on the people I would say. But yes it's probably a bit one-itis and a good idea to go for someone else. You say you got jelous when she got back with her ex, maybe she'll get jelous when u get a girl, I dont know, just putting it out there

right thanks for the replies


do you believe that the one-itis is best left alone, and why?

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move fast enough, and you can move people from one *normal* to another.

I think you misunderstood my point. You should not have to control your feelings, they should be healthy at the get-go. I would not want myself to have an emotional drama in a way like that.

Over to the friend-zone: As I said it is hard, though possible. It probably is better for him to find another girl, but I don't care as long as he wants this one. You should never give up until you get rejected, else you have no idea if you missed something out or not. I've experienced that myself, and it hurts knowing the fact that something could have been.

Edit: I know I'll get some critique on the last paragraph so I'll explain it a bit further:

It is advocated that one-ities is a bad thing due to two main factors:
1. You have already been rejected, but are still continue to go for it.
2. You have the "nice-guy"-syndrome, thus letting go of everything for the girl.

However, this guy said "normally this wouldn't have been a problem" thus I believe him to be able to step up and take action. As long as you work your way towards the goal you should not stop, unless you get rejected. If you are unable to progress further though, then you should just move on.

- Exerio

you know what? thanks. Im currently stepping up with my game, C/F and kino. she's reacting quite well.



And hell. thanks for the advice, but I wouldn't just walk away from this chick, truly, unless i know there is no point of return.

Ive known plenty of people to get girls even after they've been rejected. ^^



thanks again any other ideas on how to get closer to a girl that you already know? or at least link some good threads if you know any

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move fast enough, and you can move people from one *normal* to another.

Totally disagree with you dude, it is totally possible to get out of the friends zone. This is how I do it.

Dude

HB1 is a good friend and we have fun together I decide I want more from HB1 so what I do is I come up with a scheme to confuse HB's feelings about me by telling her everytime she called or wanted to catch up I'm seeing my other friend (HB 2) that night/day etc.

Eventually HB1 wants to suss out my friendship with this mystery girl who is stealing my attention by saying something like 'oh you have a girlfriend im so happy for you blah blah...'
To which I say something along the lines of 'Haha nah no way! its nothing like that, I mean occasionally we have great sex but we're totally just mates'

This way I have established that I am capable of having friendships with loose sexual boundaries. I don't need to convince her 'it's right' to cross the sexual line with me because I'm already doing it with someone else. I gaurantee she will feel jealous at the attention you are giving this new girl, and if you keep your kino going everytime you see her eventually she will subconsciously want to compete with this girl for your affections and that means giving up the goods baby!

Don't change the person, change the reality.

BOOYAH!

thanks for the insight. but Ive already done that. with not much success

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move fast enough, and you can move people from one *normal* to another.

right.



after making out with her ex, she told me she loved me.

i remain confused. :S

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move fast enough, and you can move people from one *normal* to another.