My girl and I have been together for two years now. She is here from Spain and basically has no friends. I don't have really any friends either but my basic four and one doesn't live in my town and the other one has a baby. Tonight is Sat. 11pm and we are just sitting here waiting for one of my friends to call and tell us where and when we are going to meet up to go out.

It is like this every Sat. If I don't have a plan of what to do then we just sit. I get real anxious and feel I am losing her interest as being predictable. Or fear one day i will just get sick of the routine and decide to act rash like break up with her for the third time.

I guess the solution to this would be to seek out more couples and tag along with what they are doing. I am just a real shy and self couscious guy who worrys about every little thing, which makes matters worse.

On top of that when we do go out. We both usually act quiet and don't have a good time. Our laughs are forced and we look forward to just going home to go to sleep and hope for a better tomorrow.

I just want to go out most Saturdays and have a good time with lots of laughing and smiles anticipating the next time. Jealousy is just another chapter to my venting. I will save that for another post. I am just one of those guys that dont believe that guys can be just friends with girls without wanting to try and get into their pants. Which brings my anxiety and, self consciouseness and worry to greater heights.
Any input, suggestions, tips ect....

Thanks,

Ok i read the first 3 sentences of your post.

I think you need to relax.

I think you need to be more confident.

I think you need to stop taking the blame for her not having anything to do.


I think you need to spend some independent time away from each other.

Have your life, and help her have her life.

You don't have to do everything together.

Don't ever think a negative thing about yourself again. You are not the cause of her wanting to break up with you! If you can understand that, then you won't need to come here and ask for help.

--Magnum45

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Walk Hard

I can understand that you didn't read his post magnum, as that was not what he asked about.

I would advice you cmagnet to find a hobby that both of you enjoy, a sport for example is great! You can also occasionally do a cinema-trip, head out for dinner, picnic etc.

Point being, if you can start up an activity that both of you enjoy, you won't have to feel ashamed of being home on Saturdays.

- Exerio

Alright there cmagnet.

I hate staying in on a Saturday night too! When I was a bit younger I was literally out EVERY night - and I think when I sit in on a Saturday that part of my brain still wonders why the hell I'm not out!

In my relationship, we often go out together - and have found, similarly, that nights out just aren't that great anymore. Nothing to do with our company - but we simply have grown out and done that 'clubbing thing' far too many times, despite our young age.

Its no longer exciting. Key word.

As Exerio rightly said, Saturday night is only ONE part of your week you could be having fun. There is so much other time.

Ditch the idea of going out on the town with friends if it really isn't doing it for you, and find a new hobby.

Join a gym (as hard work as it sounds) you'd be surprised how much fun it can be taking up a hobby together and working through it hand in hand.

Throw in some cinema trips. Some casual days out to lunch.

Hell, maybe even some kind of night course you can both learn a new skill.

Possibilities are endless when you think outside the box. And that's what excitement is - something away from the norm.

These things won't do too badly for your confidence either!

Let us know how it goes bro.

Riot.

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Using situational openers?
Throwing yourself in?
Able to flow conversationally from every good or bad comment they make?
That's the way its done.
The only game is natural game.