Huge Stickign Point, HELP!



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A Sticking Point or SP is an issue you CONSISTENTLY run into.

It is NOT a point where you get stuck with ONE SPECIFIC GIRL.

A Sticking Point is:
Quote:
I keep getting LMR whenever I bring girls back to my place. This has happened at least 10 times already! What am I doing wrong?
A Sticking Point is NOT:
Quote:
I got LMR with this one girl! What do I do?
IT IS AGAINST THIS BOARD'S RULES TO POST THREADS ABOUT JUST ONE GIRL
If you have not already gone out and practiced enough to have a real Sticking Point from meeting an ABUNDANCE of women, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO POST HERE.



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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 9:01 am 
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Wow I have some major sticking points, well my problem with dating is that when I like a girl, I start acting like way too much of a nice guy, and kind of like a dork, don't know how to fix it yet. So I took this amazing girl I like quite a bit out to the movies and dinner and I turn into a complete dork and run out of things to say also. God I like this girl, but when I put my arm around her in the movie I was so freaking nervous and this ONLY happens to me when I really, like a girl, I have had so many girls that like me and I turn them down left and right but when I actually like a girl everything I have learned and everything I know seems to go straight out the fucking window. Dang why can't I just pretend I don't like her and I would be my normal smooth talking self, but the problem is I actually ended up liking her. I didn't even use any line I'd normally use on a girl to get her to like me; the problem was I wanted her to like me for me. God my head feels like it wants to explode right now. What I think happened was I came off as to needy or something or asked too much about her, like I really wanted to know but I was genuinely interested. Dam I hate fucking up, why does this have to be so hard when it’s actually a girl you like. Somebody give me some advice, I don't care what it is just tell me something.

Background: This was a first date, we met up at a movie theater talked for a few min, we had been talking on IM the last few days so a lot of those general questions are out of the way, I had my arm around her for most of the movie and she didn’t seem to mind and leaned in close to me, then once my arm got tired, I just grabbed her hand and see seemed cool with it but she didn’t squeeze my hand so I didn’t get an IOI in that sense, after the movie was over, I asked her out to eat and we talked about pretty much everything, oh ya I played for everything including the movie and dinner since it was our first date, if that’s the wrong thing to do then someone let me know. Then when we were driving back she asked me like what I liked about her or something or and I answered with cause I think I thought we’d get along well and stuff. Then later on I asked her what she thought of me, and she answered with, I think you are really NICE. I don’t know how to take that, later on she said something else about her liking to go with the flow and school is really busy for her right now. Now the problem with that is, that’s the same line I use when I’m tring to be nice to a girl and just want to be friends, although she never said that, I don’t know if I’m reading to much into it or not. Where do I go from this, do I call her back or text her. If I am reading to much into this then what’s a really fun second date to take a girl? Guys give me some advice!


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 9:08 am 
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One thing is for sure. If you don't go for the kiss close the next time you go out, chances are that you will fall in the LJBF zone..

And about that nervosity? I'd suggest that you have another girl as your reserve. In this case, if you screw up with this one, you will still have another girl waiting for you. Of course this is not gonna happen because you will lose your nervosity if you have a "spare". Hope you understand what I'm trying to tell you.

Kinda in a rush now, so if something is unclear, tell me and I will explain when I come home tonight.


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 3:36 pm 
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basically you need to make a bold move that says I AM NOT LOOKING FOR ANOTHER FRIEND! the i dont give a fuck attitude will help, im in the same perdicerment mate we both just have to go for it, wait 2 days and call her that gives her time to think about not having you and if she likes you enough she shud call you anyway, good IOI is time spend away and they make first contact and then theyve made the conversation so they feel obliged out of politeness that we have in this day and age to continue it, the best thing ive found with girls i like alot is tease the hell out of them by like disqualifying them for height age anything that isnt the same as me and it helps wen conversation goes stale ok i have gone on abit sorry good luck mate


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2009 8:04 am 
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Hey fellows, I appreciate both your guys’ advice. Well I figured I'd give you an update, today, was chilling and saw that she got online, I wanted to talk to her bad, but I left it alone, figuring if she wanted to talk then she can send me a message, so about 20 to 30 min after she got online she sends me a message, starting with Hey! so we talk for a about 3 hours online and in the first 20 to 30 min I was joking with her about going on a date someplace, and she tells me she can't this week only cause her class (she seemed to be sad about this and actually wanted to go this weekend) is getting done but she for should can next week, after that I was just joking with her the rest of the time, and I used a ton of negs, just because I like this girl so much I'm intentionally not using any obvious lines with her, but even with just the negs alone she seemed to get a kick out of it, and was pretty much laughing the entire time. Next week I'm planning on either taking her to the zoo or a local park and then go carting. Today I feel a lot more confident that she is starting to like me, the last time I wasn't even sure and thought she just wanted to be friends. If you guys know any great place for a second date with a girl that’s fun and doesn't cost a lot of money (the money doesn't really matter, I just don't want her to think I'm trying to buy everything for her) let me know. I for sure was teasing her a lot today and she seemed be eating it up. Oh ya, I will for sure do my best to kiss close on the second date.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:17 am 
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You're doing great so far. Remember one thing though: When you go on a second date, make sure you start building a lot of COMFORT. This means that you should stop negging her so much and quit being "cocky". You have her attention, so stop with it. Now just build comfort. Without the comfort = no kiss.

Read this if you have read The Mystery Method:
You are now in position C1 - C3. Important rule: When doing a transition between A3 and C1, you stop being cocky because now is the time for her to get to know you emotionally. She needs to know if you'll be good boyfriend material in the future.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2009 12:09 pm 
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You don't really have an opportunity to neg her, and to build comfort with her if you're at a movie, that's why you didn't get anywhere.

First time out should be somewhere open where you can talk, neg, and eventually end up kiss-closing her.

Just continue doing what you're doing for your second date, you should be fine.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2009 2:49 pm 
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haha, oh dear oh dear.. i wish you were in Sydney my friend, then i would personally coach you. You seem like a sweet, caring individual, so ill post on here and give you my 2 cents.

argh.. I generally don't do this too, as most of these posts humor me but after reading yours, i feel like there is a place in my heart where I actually understand where your coming from :)!


So my dearest of young comrade amigo, the reason everything goes out the window when you see this girl, is because there was nothing of real substance learned in the first place. That's called living in the moment, and when a man despite his ability to interact with a woman puts so much care and love into a date with a woman, then if nurtured and educated right, he can eventually learn to make EVERYTHING in regards to women and dating spin around his finger.. with hard work of course :)

So you are on the right track, you are obviously making plain mistakes, and when a girl says your really nice, it generally is on the level to you are slightly homosexual! I think it all comes back to honesty, and you have to learn to be honest as a man, and look at yourself, your hands, your body and say, alright how can i be honest, how can i be honest with the center of myself, about everything i have, and how can i be a honest man and make her feel and understand that. Your insecurity is obviously not serving you, so you need to brake down exactly what you feel and when you feel it, and there has to be a resilience built into your mind which says, "hey woooo.. im feeling like a little bitch now.. wait.. little bitch.. thats not me.. nooooo, " every time you feel your being pushed out of your center.

In my early days the best exercise i did, was, when i felt the feeling of anxiety kick in, to take a small breath, hold it, and then after 1 second exhale, and in that moment i would realize that I'm loosing my cool, and i would slow down - then i would resume. I would pay attention to this in particular, and make sure I articulate my words and watch my body language, as it was the first to collapse in on me when i got in this unproductive zone.

---

Now as far as forgetting about things to say.. and I'm really SPAM allot here, I hope you appreciate this! You have to do something very out of your natural zone, you will have to get a pad, pen and paper... sounds annoying already dosen't it :)? and on it, you have to write, what your goals, dreams and ambitions are.

IF you don't know, and you feel like your taking up paper for no reason, you should look into what you like!

A while ago, i never thought id be a good actor, a great musician, i never thought id travel with people who were famous and wealthy, but life simply pushed me exactly where I was ment to go. There is allot of peer pressure on us to be something else, parents, friends, everything, you need to distance yourself form that and discover whats truly important to you! It could be as little as taking up martial arts, then getting very very very inspired at it, and taking that inspiration and knowledge to the women you meet.

Another good thing about writing is that when you wake up in the morning, you can read the enthusiasm and ideas you had the night before, and take that into the real world.

Wow.. now I've given away everything!

---

Finally, to cement that you do something about your life, I'm going to tell you what will happen next... After reading this post, you probably will feel good and validated and yet not pull off that trigger in your head to do something about it, i sincerely hope that's not the case! You have to realize that this journey is run only by ourselves, and that the special moments where everyone notices you, come from your own hard and honest work.

---

I would also go to the book store if I were you, and grab a book on body language, practice your voice tonality, and the way you communicate with your body on daily basis.

Now this girl likes you, and you have to understand what women and men are. The very basic foundation is that men are masculine, and women are feminine.

Women want to be dominated, they get a kick out of being dominated and then falling into their emotions and loosing themselves in them! That's what a woman is.

I think the best thing i can do for you, is give you piere woodman, and make you watch it, and then i believe you will understand more clearly..and over time the chips will fall in place.

Now this is for educational use, not enjoyment, as this is a forum which aims to bring the very best to your doorstep, and ..tada.. I'm here...

Learn


http://www.tnaflix.com/view_video.php?v ... 28aa08b90e

Do you notice how she says no, yet continues going forward? that's called falling into her emotions! Women want that from a man, the dominance, that's what gets them off about a man, that's what you can provide, that no other women can. If you couldn't provide that masculine factor, women would turn over and be lesbian.

So Imagine now after watching this movie, what it would be like to get your current self to play Piere.. would that girl really get off or get creeped out and walk off? do you have what it takes to accomplish what he is accomplishing as a man?

Every time a woman goes out with you she wants to feel that sexual part to yourself, and the man that's connected to that. From now on, that's what a date will mean. Sometimes you won't need to bring out that sexual side, but you'll always be a man, and she has to be reminded, by the way you look at her and talk to her, that you have that side in you.

lol...

best of luck man!

_________________
Back, starting over as of 2012.


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