It seems like everywhere I go at my high school the guys AMOG me, not even around girls just when I'm trying to make friends with guys. I often feel like I'm unarmed and just totally defensless when they make jokes in front of groups of people about me being gay or scaring girls away or dumb typical shit like that. A lot of the Amog'ing shit seems a little too confrontational and I do NOT want to start any fights. What are some ways of defending myself against jokes like that?

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Be a real AMOG and punch him in the face.

Actually this is good advice because high school age kids dont know any better and'll just argue if you try with words.

1) Start self defence sports like: krav maga (check it out, it will be always useful in your life)
2) Buy yourself a book on how to verbally win a fight
3) Buy yourself a book on how to become alpha
4) Befriend your enemies that are amoging you!!!

hope this helps
cheers

fuck all that. the best AMOG defense I ever saw was by this kid at my high school. He was kinda chunky, so anytime anyone would insult him he'd say, "Be nice I'm fat!" or something hella funny. The kid was so funny and had so much self confidence he could make jokes about himself and laugh at himself so well that no one messed with him. One time we were driving on the freeway with a couple buddies and we passed this sign that said "Jesus Saves" and my friend read it out loud. So this guy goes, "AND GRETSKY(or however its spelled) SCORES ON REBOUND!!". Trust me, be able to laugh at yourself, be friendly, take it, sometimes laugh with them. At the very least if they see it doesn't bother you and you don't make a scene they'll stop doing it because it no longer gives them attention.

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"He is god, he will understand. And if he does not, then he is not god, and we need not worry."
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This. I found out through my high school years that the best way to make friends and to lose enemies is to make people laugh. Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself and make a joke here and there. Those guys could bust out laughing.

I went to a "ghetto" high school and was a dweebie white kid there surrounded by gangs and racial tension. I made a lot of friends with some of the alphas there because I was smart, mellow, and made them laugh. I felt pretty damn safe knowing that some of my friends were these black belts and gangsters. After a while, people simply stopped picking on me because they knew I hung out with these guys.

That's how you do it.