Hi,

I have a major problem...

I have known this girl for years and we lost contact - however one day she messaged me on facebook out of the blue and we met up again.

However I stupidlly allowed myself to be LJBF by her.

I see her almost every day (her request) and she calls me alot every day without fail.

However this is where it gets weird...

I told her my feelings for her (stupid i know) and she said we are just friends and she would never see me in that way and im not her 'type'

but...

Since then I have pretty much gotten over her - and i've let her know that (and as i really have i think she can sense it a bit) - but - i've also been like playing a bit hard to get and like i dont care etc... and she flirts with me like crazy (and the more I back away from her - the more she flirts)

So... what do you think I should do about this one? I haven't got oneitis anymore but it would be nice to be with her cos well - she needs me lol

Timez

its a ploy man. even if you gotten over her. It like the cat string theory. you put the ball of yarn in front of it and it loose intrest, well even before that, but since you have taken that away from her she wants it back. She basicly just gonna take you on a emotional rollercoaster ride so i wouldnt bite at the bait. Just be like the way you are, un-intrested. If she wants you, she'll tell you. girls will play like that to feel a sense that she is still sexy and can get you sorta like a self-estmee booster.

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"Live life to the fullest, never look back, remember No regrets" J.f

Timez:

The key to getting out of the friend zone is suddenly showing a complete personality change. If she thinks of you as just a friend, a not sexual object, you need to show her something different about yourself, so she will not associate that with platonic feelings. It is hard to describe.

You're right about the hard to get thing, because she is used to you having feelings for her that she doesn't have back. It gives her a good feeling to know you like her, and she will try to get that feeling if you take it away from her.

Show her confidence, and that you've learned a lot of new things and grown as a person since you had feelings for her.

Show her preselection, if you guys hang out a lot then ask her for advice on other girls (without being a total dick about it).

Show her that you have high standards about girls (above) but also give her compliments about her appearance (very brief, just to send mixed messages).

Build up kino.


This is not 100% because you did tell her your feelings but it still has a good chance of working as long as you show her that you don't need her.

Yours,
Red Hot

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Yours,
Red Hot

lol not only that but i have actually said to her "all the feelings have gone" - and meant it! - now id just like to F-close her lol - and she tried to say - if you was ever to have a chance with me you would have to prove to me... (I interupted her here - and said...) - "no you'll have to prove to me that - you are going to be faithful - that you will stop acting all crazy - etc etc..." - she didnt know what to say! lol.

can i just say this stuff is absolute gold!

Timez

me?

glad i could help

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Yours,
Red Hot

Didn't read the other guys' replies, but I say this, just stop talking to her altogether for a long time. Give it about maybe 3 weeks or so. Fuck going to see her every day, she is wasting your time. Potential time you could with another HB. Think about it this way, she's into other dudes and is using you as a "gay shopping friend", it's time you be the "jerk". If you don't understand what I am saying, then take it this way; SHE needs you, but you have to make it seem like you DON'T need her. In retrospect you don't, you are a man.

Be aloof about everything, and like I said, give her a good letting alone for a while. Then, talk to her again, but this time do something different. Don't tell her about your feelings directly (women hate that), but be savvy about it.

Ask her if she'd like to have dinner with you, if she refuses, tough shit for her. After all, if you are really as interested in this female as you say, then you will have no trouble letting her know your intentions.

I went through a similar situation with a HB10 and who was a virgin. For about a day or two after her maniac episode of LJBF (after having a high interest in me), I cut the cord.

Now I'm talking to 6 different women who all want to date me. There you go.

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I'm not run of the mill, because it's from the mill I'm running...

hmmm problem is that I am kinda not good with women - i used to be wicked when i was younger but that was because all the girls used to love it if you was a bit soppy with them - but since we all got older everything changed and so I didn't learn a new way - I am learning though - slowly...

also do you think that 3 weeks or so will give me a new chance with her? or do you think she will just see me as the 'old me' as soon as she sets eyes on me again?

if you think I have some sort of renewed chance then thats all good cos i will start from scratch - maybe wouldnt need an opiner - but i will hug her (i dont normally when i see her) which might also make her think - hold on - somthings different here...

I think if im gonna get this girl im gonna have to put alot into...

pre-selection
DHV
attraction

- then i might have a good chance for the rest.

What do you guys think?

p.s. - I have a feeling that if i dont contact her for 3 weeks out the blue like that she will turn up at my house - what do i do in that situation?

Timez

p.s.s. - she initiates kino with me alot recientlly - and kinda naughter and naughter - it started when she got me to "tickle her feet" - but that ended up being me sliding my hands all over her legs and stuff - and she didnt stop me! - and she was moaning with pleasure lol - then another time she put my hand on her boobs and the other one in between her legs (we were both dressed tho) - and she comes and sits on my lap sometimes - her excuse is play flighting but i do think thats an excuse lol - but then she SAYS she dont want me like that - her words are well inconsistent with her actions - and she holds eye contact with me alot - when i catch her eye she just stares at me lol - and i have to say "what?" in the end or she just wouldnt stop - what you make of this?

by reading the ps and pps i would say that clearly she enjoys having the power over you (her sexual assets, the fact shes knows you would Fclose her etc). Even by saying "what?" when she is staring at you shows that she can keep prompting a reaction from you.

take control of the situation and instead of being drawn in, make her work for it and even then dont give her the satisfaction of a responce or reaction. see what this evokes on her end after a while...

in terms of the massage or wateva, could you not just demand from her and switch round what she is saying/doing so that your still guiding the sitution instead of being guided?

...

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Pascal.

A PUA is for life, not just for christmas

i didnt understand a word of that lol

ok sorry, if i didnt know wat i was talking about neither would I!

what i meany simply is she enjoys having the power over you and. Even when you say"what?" when she is staring at you shows to her that she can prompt a reaction from you.

i would say to takesome sort of control over the situation. instead of being drawn in by her staring or pleas for attention, make her work for it. see how this changes her persona as she may become even more flirty and touchy or much less so (hoping for you to beg for her attention back again)

hope that is a bit clearer

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Pascal.

A PUA is for life, not just for christmas

lol yes much better

ok so just one question - how do i make her work for it without actually saying "work for it"

Timez

stubborness is always a good way to tease and flirt.. the more stubborn you are, the more she will try to get you to break

just joke around with her by saying "im puttting my foot down, im not gonna be your personal play thing" or something like that...

this is just my thoughts but you cant do it all 100% jokingly as she is kinda using you and im sure you wanna know where you stand. so just be straight up but not too rude or blunt as that might push her too far...

push then pull (just like shes been doing to you)

x

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Pascal.

A PUA is for life, not just for christmas

Thus far, the OP has been the cat and he's been a nice little kitty, playing fetch and meowing his heart out.

The OP needs to:

Turn this girl into a frustrated and lonely 50 year old cat lady. Those old lonely ladies get cats to receive some emotional comfort but why cats instead of dogs? It's my opinion this has A LOT to do with the "Variable Ratio Schedule" of reinforcement. Google it.

Basically, a dog rewards owners with affection on a predictable schedule. Toss it a treat and it goes crazy. Thus a dog usually gets his treat and other positive reinforcements when the owner WANTS affection in return. On the other hand, cats have a mind of their own. Sometimes you give it a treat and it just walks off. Sometimes you just sit there and the cat curls up next to you. This UNPREDICTABILITY is what keeps those old ladies glued to their cats like gamblers are glued to their slot machines. (If you knew the slot machine will pay out after the 100th pull, wouldn't you just wait there until others pulled 99? However, nobody knows this which is why people sit there for hours on end pulling away)

OK . . . so, how do you frustrate her to death? You reward her with a variable ratio schedule. How do you this? You BECOME MAN and you live YOUR life. If she's being cute, you do things for her when you feel like it and you have the time but if you're busy with your work, school, other friends, or other ladies, she gets NOTHING regardless of whether she hops around like one legged pirate or offers you three orifices. (This might go against your instincts but I'd argue that the instincts of many men have been foundered by Walt Disney films and/or too much estrogen in our diet) To be sure, you are not purposely ignoring her(as others suggested) nor are you being mean. You are simply living a MAN'S life. You don't kiss up to her and then ignore her thinking you are going to attract her. You do this and you turn yourself into a little 17 year old girl. This is EXACTLY what "love struck" little girls do and this is EXACTLY what she is doing. Stop playing her game and start living the life of a man.

You want her to work for it? If you can grasp what is written above, she'll sit there and yank your cock all day long like the way those old ladies yank the handles of slot machines or sit around the porch all day long petting their cats. If you can achieve this, you will then functionally turn yourself into the OWNER of the cat with the ball of yarn in your hand. At the very least, stop meowing . . .

LOL!

I cant beleve what happend today...

She was knocking on my door this morning and my mum let her in (as i hoped she would) - i was however naked in my bed still and she came and sat with me and i was sure to mention i was naked lol...

anyway we chatted for a bit and eventually i managed to find a good excuse to shut the door so it was just us 2..

now before this she has kept saying to me that i have no dick lol and its tiny - so today i mentioned that i would show her it - and she said "go on then" - and so i got it hard and said "i dare you to look at it" and she said "are you serious" and i said "yes" lol - and she took the covers off

she was shocked cos it was big ha ha - anyway after that i was horny so i started playing with myself in front of her - and she grabbed it and started doing it...

anyway after seeing that she was getting horny too - and she started kissing me and playing with me - and then she started letting me feel her up and suck her boobs and touch her pussy - i could tell she was totally horny but she wudnt have sex (prob felt too guilty lol) and she was pushing her boobs in my face...

anyway after all this we both kept bringing it up - and she was thinking about it when i said stuff lol - and she said...

------------------------------------------------------------

her: "what we gonna do about earlier"?

me: what you mean?

her: well u know whats the drill - what do you want from me?

me: i didnt say i wanted anything from you

her: well are we gonna keep doing it?

me: do u wanna?

her: yeah

me: ok then its naughty

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lol so my question is - what now? cos i wanna fuck her next time

Timez

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