im finding it almost impossible not to offend girls when i try to work the cocky&funny routine. i know im coming across too cocky and insulting so could u guys give me some advice as to how to bring out my funnier side...

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If you're not going to go all the way, why go at all?

Cocky/funny, the cocky part should not make you look egotistical, it should just give your comical performance an edge. Make your jokes witty and slightly sarcastic without going overboard or making yourself look to arrogant.

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That which doesn't kill me, only makes me stronger...

Thanks man, i appreciate what you're saying here. Have you any examples of this right balance of cocky/funny? I understand what you're telling me, i just want it to be crystal...

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If you're not going to go all the way, why go at all?

being cocky funny shouldn't really be a routine, it's got to be quick and off the mark. If she says anything that can be turned dirty (in an obvious way) just remark oi OI with a cheeky face

but don't do this if it isn't obvious what you're emplying. You don't want her to have to stand there and be confused cos that'l DLV.

If she's really blonde, neg her about something she's doing, and say "it's alright, you're blonde, i forgive you" - Then put a MASSIVE smile on and laugh. She'll say something like oi! and might hit you....to which you say anything like "careful, i'll get the old bill (do americans say this? - police) on you for sexual harassment" etc etc

cocky/funny is something that i grew up on even before i knew what it was

i was always sarcastic as fuck and i knew it too and my mom always asked me why i was

i never knew why but growing up on that kind of gives me an edge because if a girls says something, i can turn it around and neg her on it with the cocky/funny so quick

oh yea and i thought about it the other day, if i have kids in the future, i will tech him how to bag women once he enters middle school

You're forgetting that here in the US, oi! doesn't mean anything.