ok i just read that i should write down my routines so i am. I already have this one that makes my friends and some chics laught althougt i dont know if it good for atraction or giving DHV or anything ok here it is:

There i was on the couch and sudenly I felt some pain in my chest and i got up quickly but the pain got worse and it felt like an elephant was sitting on me and i lay down again and I tried to reach my phone but I could barely move..Finaly i get it and call my mom and tell her that im having a heart atack to send help fast... she says shes coming and by the time she got to my house i was already fine

Then she asks : ¿What happened?

And i say: it was gas

I know it probably gonna go EEEWWWW but i think delivering it correctly it can be preety funny

about me calling my mom : im 17 and in high school so i live in my parents house also theres no 911 in bolivia so i think it doesnt DLV in that

Uh, if the punchline was "it was gas", then it makes it a fart joke. Guys who talk about their farts is a major DLV, the topic itself is low brow, and most women won't be into that. Secondly, why would you think you were having a heart attack if you're only 17? Are you morbidly obese? If so, you should not be drawing attention to this fact and be trying to play it down. If not, and you're in decent physical shape this makes you seem unintelligent for thinking you could have a heart attack at such a young age. Finally the fact that you called your mom for help makes you seem clingy and a momma's boy. I don't like this story at all. There are a million things to talk about-- this probably should not be one of them.

~Antithesis

and gassy, are you the sun?

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"That's how you become great, man. Hang your balls out there!"--Copy store clerk (Jerry Maguire)

No good. Actually if I heard a guy use that I would burn him hard for it and then take his set that he never opened right.

thank you everybody... wont try it

LOL

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Vino, vedi, vici.
I drank some wine, I saw her, I conquered

Just to clear any dout in your mind about using this...don't lol but keep trying!