Recently f-closed a Chinese HB7 so I'm on some high. But the high on this night cost me a decent f-close.

The night this happened, I told a local PUA that I hadn’t been challenging myself a lot lately. Told him I need to start sarging higher value HBs or those that are usually seen as no-go. So then, before heading out for a solo sarge last night, I drowned two beers and polished off a steak. I don’t know about you but eating well always puts me in a good frame.

Anyway, I hit a pub in uptown Kuala Lumpur where I find it half-empty. There’s tables and seats outside and I say hi to the guys on one table and to the three girls at another. Nothing specific, give off the air of being in my territory. I get in and there’s a guy with two girls playing pool while some tables are filled with varying sets of males and females. Nothing smoking there so I sit at the bar and order my beer.

Turn to my left, see Dude1 staring at his beer and say hi, ask him what’s going on. Challenge him to a game of pool and we play three games, some girls come to watch and I neg them about being chicken. The place is basically dead for pussy and I’m bored. Few more beers, ciggies and some dance with a Swedish HB5 and I’m not satisfied. I want to take it further.

I come across Dude2 who’s sitting on his own again. I ask him, “Which girl do you want in here?”

He laughs, point at one and I walk over to the girl, an Indian HB6 and tell her, “I know you’re shy and so is my friend. He want to say hi.” She smiles, follows me, I introduce them and exit.

I see two girls sitting at a table and say hi, introduce myself in no special way. They tell me they’re from Sweden. I tell them there’s another girl from Sweden in the pub somewhere, “let me find her, maybe you’ll stop looking so miserable ey?”

I find the Swedish HB5, get her to the table of Swedish girls and introduce them and before they turn to me, I exit the set and go back to Dude1 who’s returned to staring at his beer. I shoot he shit with him and he goes, “You’re making lots of friends.”

I tell him to loosen up. The pub has filled up by now with more guys in the place. Dude2 has lost Indian HB6 because what he lacks in personality he makes up for by being needy. He joins us and after looking around, says there’s too much competition in the pub. I laugh and go, “that’s even better, dude!”

A prostitute comes up to the three of us and tells me, “I like you. I want you to fuck me.” I look at her and ask her, “Cool, how much will it cost me?” Dude1 and Dude2 stare in silence, oblivious to the fact that she’s a prostitute. I’ve seen her before, usually comes in, flirts, sells her story and snags a chump. I take my matters elsewhere by inviting the guys to a game of pool. We play pool for a while, assess the situation and that’s when Dude2 nudges me.

Two middle-eastern girls walk past us. Both of them are tall and dark-haired, well dressed and have solid bodies. One is easily a 7 and the other follows close behind at 6. They sit, order their drinks and the temperature in the club rises. These girls are fucking smokin’. While the guys are still counting to three, I move to their table, laughing.

ME: “You guys won’t believe this but my friend over there thinks you’re from the Middle East!”
HB6: “We are!”
ME: “No kidding! What you doing in a place like this?”

I’m standing in between them and when they tell me they’re from Iran, I go, “Group hug!!”

They hug me and I see a good number of PUAs turn away. Some continue to monitor the situation. I pull out a cigarette, HB6 lights it up for me, I thank her then take her hand and look at her watch, “Your watch says its time!”

“Time for what?”

“For this…”

I pull her from her table, swirl her round and she begins to dance with me. I extend my hand to the HB7 but she turns it down and I ignore her for a while until we finish dancing. HB6 sits down and I ask them a few silly questions then decide to escalate,

“What’s the most fun you guys have had with your clothes on?”

This is to get them thinking about sex even though they don’t realize it. It’s natural for somebody to think clothes should be off to have fun when you ask them this question.

“What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever put in your mouth?”

“Have you ever matched your panties with your shoes?”

I continue with this naughty line of questioning until the HB7 buys into it and asks me to sit down with her. I tell her “Not yet, there’s still more girls coming!” and laugh. She playfully shoves me and I sit down, put my arm around her and kiss her on her cheek. She offers no resistance and I play with her hair. I order my fifth beer. I’m getting tipsy.

Then check this, Dude2 appears out of, what, some Charles Bronson movie and goes … “Why not share the fun?”

I look at him and wonder, should I AMOG him and go,

“But you are having fun! … On your own!”

Or should I be the nice guy and share? I decide the latter and introduce him by name (which impresses him) then tell the girls, “Dude2 wants to join our private party. You think we should let him?”

I’ve aligned myself with them so naturally, it’s the three of us against any AMOG that dares. Its funny, they look at me for approval and I go, “Sure man, why not?”

He sits, we shoot the shit, talk about Arabic women and I get HB7 to do a mean-ass belly dance for me. I’m sitting when she does this and I hold her hips while she’s shaking. I laugh, some minutes ago, I was invisible now I know I’m invincible!!
For some reason, Swedish girl from earlier set stops by and asks me where the toilet is. I point her towards it and she says thanks, squeezes my shoulder and the HB6 laughs at me, “Mr. Popular, ey?”

I shrug and continue running kino on the HB7. Dude2 is at it again with his needy shit by asking HB6, “Do you have a boyfriend?” I feel like kicking him in his eye or throwing dust in them. Anything. I take HB7 to the bar, order tequila shots and continue kino then fuck it, go for the kiss. We kiss for a few seconds and she tells me to slow down. I laugh and tell her, “We’ve come this far, we might as well speed up!”

I order my sixth beer. We kiss again and then she says she’s going to the toilet. I let her go and tell you what, she stops at her table, gets HB6 and they head to the toilet. When they return, I start ignoring them by staying at the bar while Dude2 continues with his Who Wants to Be a Millionaire dumb-ass questions. Something’s happened in the toilet because they’re now sitting together instead of opposite each other.

I tell myself, fuck this, I’m out of energy so I walk over, run a false-time constraint routine and walk over to the table with Swedish girls, who have two other guys now flexing their dicks on them. One of them goes, “Oh, here he is.”

I smile, tell them I’m on my way, they insist I join them for a drink. I say hi to the guys in a friendly way then order another beer, sit down, tell them a joke about swine flu and the guys find it funny but only one of the HBs does. It raises my value as the guys high five me and I laugh back but I know I’m drained.

I’ve drunk too much. I’ve smoked too much. I can’t possibly have the willpower to fuck an HB even if one dragged m home, can I? I laugh at nothing in particular; turn to look at the table of middle-eastern HBs. Dude2 has been displaced by three other guys. I look at HB7, roll my eyes and make a stupid face. She laughs and I stand up and exit.

Mad fun! Wasn't it? I wonder, maybe I just wanted to mix it up